Self employed , baby due wed!

[marley]

As the title says!

We started our business a few months ago, oh won't be able to take time off.
He mainly works a 4 day week, or finishes at 1.

He has 4 days of work this Week and 3 days next!

He said if baby comes I won't go to work, but I told him he should.

He's so sweet , but now im slighty cacking myself at the prospect of being alone pretty much straight away!

Mum said she can have some time off... What do you think?
should I take this offer!?

Oh said if it ends in c section, I have no choice he's definitely staying
At home.

Anyone else in a similar situation.

On the positive side I think if it's just me and baby, it gives us lots of bonding time xxx

 

[Jayceesmumma]

I honestly think youll want you OH there at the crucial birth time.. Maybe have ur mum with u til u only have a short time left (can request being checked more frequently so u know he won't miss it) and they can switch??

 

[marley]

He's only working 20 mins away, so there is no question he will be there at the birth. Mum is also birthing
Partner and she's a nurse at the hospital which is opposite my
House.
She's made Arrangements to leave work as soon as I go into labour!!

I'm more concerned with the aftermath.

Mum text this morning, and either way she'll be having some time off.

I think it's so wrong that if your SE you are not entitled to Paternity pay. I know it's not a lot of money but every little helps.

Makes me sick paying tax and Ni and this is how we get treated x

 

[Geminiblue]

take all the help offered that you can get, its manic in those first few weeks xxx

 

[Geminiblue]

...thats bad isnt it...no paternity...I got SMP from the government so should they not do that for the father? Mmmm I didnt realise.

xxx

 

[marley]

Nothing, it's up to us to save it and organise it. So he can have time off,
Which we have saved etc but when
You run your own business you can't just put it down and forget it.

I got smp from my old work place in
One lump sum as I left, I didn't realise they owed me
It, so that was a cheeky surprise. Mwhahaa


After next week wed he's got the rest Of the month booked off, but i
Something comes In he'll have to work!

Ahh rant over! 20 years time I hope we can reap the benefits we sowed In the early days and our children
Will appreciate how hard we worked for them! xxx

 

[marley]

Update

I've stopped feelin sorry for myself! I have a fantastic partner and family!

Women do this on there own with
No support whatsoever.

I'm focusing on the positives!!

Xxxx

 

[Jayceesmumma]

Sorry to hear ur frustration babe!! Surely you can get maternity pay... My sister is se and gets hers... They have to do something for the father too... Unless you earn too much??

 

[titch]

We're not self employed but my OH had 2 weeks off when LO was born, but I was in hospital for most of that so we had a few days at home with me an OH and the day he went back to work within half an hour I was on the phone to my mum asking her to come and help. Id had a c-section, LO couldnt feed, I was on medications which made me really tired, so when LOs nappy exploded with the biggest poo I just thought, OMG I cant do this!!! My mum was a life saver, shes very good at not getting in the way, she did stuff like clean the kitchen, do laundry and take baby when I needed to sleep. She helped me to keep trying BFing but also when I said no im tired just let me sleep she never pressurised me into it IYSWIM. I honestly have no idea how I wouldve coped without her. She had to stay cos they lived so far away too. If i have another baby I will be making firm plans to move me mother in!

 

[EmmBee123]

OH is working today, it's just the two of us today, am bricking it, scared to go for a wee and leaving her.

Take every opportunity of help, my mum's been great so far. OH is being amazing too, we got home yesterday and I've done nothing since, he's done it all. He's even left me a packed lunch for today.

 

[marley]

Sorry to hear ur frustration babe!! Surely you can get maternity pay... My sister is se and gets hers... They have to do something for the father too... Unless you earn too much??

Thanks for the response ladies ! I'm definitely going to take all the gel I can get!!

I've managed to sort it so , mum will come and be with me days oh is working up until the 11th and then oh is off for the rest of October, so I'll have him with me.

Jaycee I got smp from my employer, as I was employed in my 25th week PF pregnancy.because I left they gave me it in one lump sum, this means I'm not entitled to any Maternity allowance from the government.

Long and short of it is, I have my
Maternity pay! Not bothered about the financial aspect , I think it's rude they don't give SE dads paternity pay.
Basically if your independent enough to work for yourself, why should we help you.

Because oh works for himself he can't get any paternity pay. Them is the rules!

Xxxx

 

[Jayceesmumma]

That's awful he can't get it!!!!