rant time...

[niknaks]

sorry your all prob sick and tired of me going on about my mum and my family life. im just so confused at the moment. she keeps asking me what me and oh are doing about the registry office and mine and oh plans were to look for one on monday. but im just so annoyed. i wanna marry my oh so badly but just feel pressurised at the mo. just feel torn. i cant wait to be his wife but at the same time i dont want people to think its only because of the baby.my mums barely told anyone on her side cos shes still ashamed. she says why didnt i think of all this before, but i wason the pill, wasnt like we planned lil man but we love him already even if he was planned, we also love each other and i want people to feel we got married because of that and not because of the baby and i dont want him to think his mum and dad only got married because of him. i know shes under a lot of stress at the mo, but ive said toher just tell people whatever i dont care, i just wanna focus on the baby and she even said we can a church wedding next year and a lil reception. but id rather get it all done in one go. shes just like ive brought shame on the family and ive always gone against her and im just doing this to spite her. just feel so torn at the moment sometimes i dont even know what i want just to keep the peace

 

[Rachaellius]

Oh hun sounds like your in a horrible position! You should be getting married when you feel good and ready to. I know its stressful but i think you need to put your foot down. Making you feel like you've bought shame on the family isnt helping anyone. Sorry I can't really offer any good advise, but I hope it all works out okay. Just concentrate on keeping you and baby happy, don't worry about anyone else xxx

 

[Lovisa]

Aww hun sorry you're feeling like this.
Just take every day as it comes and if you get married soon you do but I'd you don't you don't.
All that matters at the moment is the three of you and that you know you love each other. Don't worry abit what people think, you will do it all when your ready otherwise you might regret having a quick marriage. Xx

 

[netty]

that so medieval getting married just coz your having a bubba poor you you shouldnt feel pressured to rush the best day of your life ( apart from when bubba come obv ) you do what you want to do hunny, dont ever let anyone tell you how to live your life!
Dont end up regretting your wedding day, is your family quite religious at all as this seems to be the action of a severe faith. Having a baby is nothing to be ashamed of.....shame on your mum for making you feel so bad awwww i just wanna give you a big hug!! xxxxx

 

[niknaks]

thanks girls. its all so frustating, as im writing this my mums sat there knitting a cardigan for bubba. it just dont make sense. shes all like shes happy for the baby but not happy how we done it. i dontmind that, im glad shes happy for the baby just annoyed she has to be all backwards about it. were goan and catholic and the older people from our lil community tend to talk and gossip. we also have a lot of family esp on my mums side who are in india so its the whole cultural thing. i just wish people would grow up and see that it shouldnt matter about these thing. firstly my mum had a prob with my oh cos hes mixed race then its cos of his job.i just wish shed see that im happy and cant wait for my son to be born. just wish shed see that me and my oh do want to get married just when we want to though. but were still gonna go to a regitry office tomorrow just to see, who knows might help me make my mind up x

 

[Dragonfly Fi]

I would definitely wait, just say that you have decided to leave it for the time being until it feels right. She shouldnt be pressuring you and your memory of your wedding day should not be a pressured thing...

best of luck i hope it all irons out. She sounds like she is actually really pleased but feels like she 'should' be behaving in this way to save face or whatever!

thank goodness its the last generation of these crazy 'must be married' types!!

 

[JoJo79]

really feel for you hunni, my first two girls have different dads (oh the shame lol) and when i had them i wasnt married, didnt feel pressured to get married but def felt peoples diapproval!!

Me and hubby only got married last yr (he's dd2's dad) and tbh everyones opinion of me beingpregnant again was a lot better this time and the only thing i can put it down to is the fact we are now married!!

We've been together 9.5yrs too!!

What im saying is YOU and OH decide when the times right for you, like other ladies have said dont feel pressured just because your expecting, plus (imo) you probably enjoy your wedding day a bit more when you have your body back!!

xxxxx

 

[1986princess]

feel for you hun, and you shoulnt be under this presure. do whats best for u and oh xx