Not sure what to think :/

[KoleIcepole]

Having twins, and we are so over the moon but can't lie and say we've had it easy it's been a pretty stressful couple of months and now me and my OH are just falling out something awful. I wasn't well this morning, bleeding etc, and was busy telling him how much I appreciate him and what would I do without him etc. Then I felt better and just wanted out the house, it's his only day off and I didn't want to spend it stuck in, so I said let's go for lunch but he was so grumpy about it and whenever I asked him if he wanted to go he would avoid the question. So I eventually asked him why and he hit out with his favourite line 'I just can't do anything right today can I? ' it was like a punch straight to the gut! I know I'm hormonal and I know I took it a bit over the top but I was so angry I'd spent the day thanking him and saying sorry for being unwell and as soon as there was something I said he didn't like he was making it out as if I was an arsehole all day but I don't think I was. His excuse was I was quiet and he just didn't want to go a walk, even though he knew I was quiet because I was unwell and despite that I was still talking to him. So fast forward a few hours and I try make it up to him (I feel daft for it now I should have left him) went to the shop got his favourite juice and ordered us some Chinese gave him a hug and said sorry. But he's still ignoring me. This isn't the first time and these aarguments last for days sometimes. It's the last thing I need right now and could really use some advice, thank you xx

 

[Mrs M]

He got pissed cos you wanted to go out for lunch??

 

[KoleIcepole]

Kind of. He goes a quiet moody way if it's something he doesn't want to do and he knows it gets me every time so ill just say not to bother.

 

[lisey]

You weren't forcing him though, you asked if he would like to go for lunch. I think he is being ridiculous (sorry don't want to insult your OH). I personally wouldn't put up with that, he can't get in a strop every-time something isn't quite what he wants, doesn't work like that when babies come along.
I hope you're ok and I hope it doesn't stress you out too much. Have you got any friends or family nearby that you can visit or go for lunch with instead? xx

 

[KoleIcepole]

I've started being a bit more stubborn and putting up with it less, but I really hate arguing I would rather just apologise even if it's not really my thing to apologise for and make up and get it out the way :/ (bad I know) I've told him I worry when the kids come along, my daughter has been noisy whilst he was trying to watch something on TV and he has stormed off into the other room to watch it, trying to explain he isn't going to be able to do these things. He says not to worry but I can't help it. Nobody's perfect.

 

[tinselcat]

Sounds like you're doing everything you can to please him, and far from reciprocating, he doesn't care if you're happy or not - it's all about him.

Sorry to hear you were bleeding - that can be scary - and men don't always appreciate pregnancy woes, but I think you need to start suiting yourself a little more if you can, e.g. go for the walk on your own if you don't want to be stuck inside, and don't fawn over him if he's having a sulk (it clearly doesn't work & you shouldn't be apologising for him being a moody so & so!).

These things can be difficult to resolve as people don't change easily (and I totally understand about hating arguments), but I wish you all the best in dealing with it x If you find it hard to stand up for yourself, think of it as standing up for your future babies. xx