No heartbeat

[Rainbow1234]

Found out today that our baby has no heartbeat anymore. I've to decided what to do as far as natural miscarriage, managed miscarriage or d and c and all options and really scary to me. Don't know what to do x

 

[SunnySue]

Really sorry to hear this hun I can't be of any help as far as what to do but i'm sure the ladies will help. Take care of yourself, good luck with whatever you decide x

 

[charli_]

im really sorry for your loss. i opted for a managed miscarriage. i had been carrying my baby girl for nearly 5 weeks before i found out and my body just carried on telling me i was pregnant. so they were quite concerned for my health. but i wish you well for whatever you opt for and i hope things go smoothly. i will be thinking of you. xxx

 

[VickyClare]

Hi Rainbow, I'm so sorry for your loss. I delivered naturally (stillborn at 19 weeks) but was unable to deliver the placenta. I had a D&C, a very quick procedure. I had no effects of this (apart from blood loss, like a period nothing more).

My thoughts are with you and your oh at such a sad time.

Take care of yourselves x x x

 

[stacesl3]

I'm so sorry, such a horrible thing to happen I know. The exact same thing happened to me back in Sept (had 3 scans in total) I opted for erpc as i knew I didn't/couldn't want to go thru a natural m/c. Neither option is easy though and you just have to do whatever is best for you.
If you decided to go down the op route and need to ask me anything feel free to pm me, so sorry you are going through this and i wish you all the very best xx

 

[megsmeadow]

I'm sorry to hear that rainbow. I wasn't really given an option, the staff recommended medical assistance. Have they suggested one thing over another? Also have a think about physical and emotional healing afterwards and would it help to have things happen quickly or to go through the motions at a more natural pace. No easy option or answer but you will find the right one for you. xx

 

[Rainbow1234]

Thank u everyone. They haven't recommended anything, just given me the 3 options and I've to decide. To be honest I don't know how long my work will allow me to be off so I can't really wait for it to happen naturally, medically managed miscarriage just sounds scary to me, if they're messing about and doing stuff I'd rather just be knocked out and get the d&c although I'm terrified so much to cope with after already having a loss. Sorry for your losses too x

 

[millielaura]

I'm so sorry to hear that! Big hugs to you!!

I had a loss at 14 weeks and opted for a managed miscarriage as my body wasn't expelling it properly and the doctors were worried about the risk of infection. I'm terrified of ops etc so I went for that.

If you want as less intervention as possible maybe try for a natural miscarriage, but it's just the risk for infection which can become a concern if your body doesn't expel the baby for a while. Also like you said if you don't have much time off it's best just to get it all done with.

If you want it all over and done with without having to see much then I'd say go for the D and C if you don't mind surgical procedures.

For my medically managed miscarriage they gave me a pessary and antibiotics and it was just a bit of a wait in the hospital until things started happening then I miscarried that day and got sent home in the evening. They monitored my blood pressure etc and came with painkillers and I felt well looked after!

I liked that it felt more natural than an operation but I think if I had had the D and C it may of been easier as I would just be unconscious and wake up after it had happened and wouldn't have to go through the upset of seeing baby etc but it all depends on which would make you feel better about it?

How far along are you?

xxx

 

[Lou1103]

Hi hun,
I had a natural miscarriage... Although it can be unpredictable - for me when i started to actually miscarry it took a few hours and based on that you would maybe need one day off? Depends on the bleeding and how far along you are.

I don't have experience of medical management but it did take a further 2 weeks for me to miscarry which was torture but for me personally i would rather that than have to return to hospital.

Sorry for your loss xxx

 

[MrsT2711]

Hi

So sorry to hear your news.

The same happened to me in October, should of been 11 weeks and baby was only measuring 6 weeks with no heartbeat in any of my three scans. I had terrible pregnancy symptoms so opted for the ERPC the next day. For me that was the best option, still took a week or so for symptoms to go and my boobs took even longer to return to normal.

I would say that you probably know in your heart what way you would prefer as I knew I didn't want to "pass the products" naturally as that would just hurt for me to see it. So in my case the ERPC was most definitely true right way to go. And I would go with what your heart is telling you to do. The hospital were amazing with both me and husband and I couldn't thank them enough, we got our own private room and everything. Was home for 1pm.

If you have any questions please feel free to PM me I totally know what your going through.

And as a silver lining I am pregnant again! So it happens hun I'm just so sorry this time it hasn't worked out for you

Xxx

 

[laurat]

Sorry for your loss! Xxx

 

[Rainbow1234]

Thank u so much everyone. I've booked in for a D&C but earliest appt they have is Thursday. I was 9 weeks but baby only measuring 6 and we had a heartbeat on Monday but nothing today. I think I knew in my heart as I ran out of pregnancy vitamins yesterday and refused to buy more until after my appointment today and I had been putting on stretch mark cream (prevention is better than cure!) but couldn't bring myself to do it since Tuesday. I'm feeling ok now after a big cry and letting the people we had told know. I'm sad but I know we'll be ok and we'll try again soon. Just want Thursday out the way now, I'm not normally like this but I'm so scared. Thanks again everyone! Xx

Ps. I don't know how to PM!

 

[MrsT2711]

Hi rainbow

For what it's worth I think you've made the best decision... Based on my experience anyway. I'm well aware Everyone is different tho.

I have pm'd you in case you have any questions, no pressure tho

Take care xx

 

[millielaura]

I'm so sorry again and glad you found the best decision for you xx

 

[scn]

So sorry hun xxx I've had a D&C and a medically managed and would opt for D&C every time, it's much kinder on your emotions than medical management in my opinion xxx take care xxx

 

[Hopeful75]

So sorry for your loss. I've also had both medical management and a d&c for missed miscarriages. My body had held on to baby 1 for 4 weeks, so I didn't want the agony of waiting indefinitely for it to happen naturally. Like scn, I'd opt for d&c if I had the misfortune to need it. Now pregnant again, so praying v hard I won't! Good luck on Thurs- it certainly won't be easy and I hope everything goes ok.

 

[SaraLouise]

Sorry for your loss hun x