New to this and struggling

[Tizz]

Hi everyone

So, I'm just over 7 weeks pregnant and really struggling 😢
I cry at everything and and driving myself nuts so I can only imagine what I'm doing to people around me!
I have my first midwife appointment next Wednesday so am stressed about that. Bf doesn't want to tell anyone until I'm 12 weeks so I'm keeping this massive secret whilst feeling down and cry at anything.
Please! Someone tell me what I'm feeling is normal?! My eyes are welling up just typing this.

Help!

 

[ClaireDoll]

Hi Tizz, welcome to PF.

Take a deep breath! Your hormones will be going mental right now, contributing to these feelings. Was the pregnancy planned? Is there someone close to you you could confide in? My husband doesn't want to tell anyone until our 12 week scan either, we've had 3 losses and he's pretty adamant about not telling anyone incase they are disappointed again. However, personally, I couldn't keep this completely too myself, as he doesn't really like talking ablout the baby at the moment either as he doesn't want to get his hopes up. I have secretly told my best friend as I need the support right now. I figured I would tell her if anything happens anyway so she might as well know I'm pregnant so I have someone to talk things over with. I think I would really struggle without this sounding board right now.

You need to mention to the midwife at your appointment that you're feeling a bit overwhelmed. My suspicion is it is just the hormones playing havoc and they will calm down eventually but you need any support you can get right now. Do you usually suffer bad PMS? I do, and the way I see it, those hormones are multiplied by a million when your pregnant so it's only natural to feel a bit emotional.

 

[ClaireDoll]

Also, we have a lovely supportive group of September mums to be over in Tri One forum, it's good to be able to talk to like minded ladies goin through the same thing right now x

 

[kumber]

As ClaireDoll said, come and join us in the September thread. Lots of support for you from ladies in the same boat as you.

You sound very much like your hormones are going craaaaaaazy and that's totally normal. I am a sobbing mess at the moment, I can't even watch Disney films with my two boys because I'm sobbing at the songs, or the endings, or the nostalgia!! Being pregnant is like PMS but 50 million times more extreme. The first tri is emotionally the hardest as your hormones shoot through the roof to get baby growing. This is the quickest growth they will ever have in their lives, so the body works extra hard to keep up with that.

How you're feeling is completely and utterly normal, but if you do feel you need to talk to someone then do. It's important to keep a dialogue going with someone you trust during pregnancy (which is often not the father as you feel like you want to throttle them and hug them in equal measure!!), so you can get out all those feelings, frustrations, worries and exciting feelings as and when you need to. Big hugs lovely, you're doing an ace job already!

 

[JulyBug]

I remember feeling exactly the same during the early weeks! I think the fact that no one knows doesn't help, we didn't tell anyone at all until I was 12 weeks either and I felt sooooo much better once everybody knew! But I too felt very down and emotional, I didn't want to do anything or talk to anybody, I felt miserable! As somebody else said I do think it's partly your hormones going into over drive! Mention it to your midwife and I'm sure you'll get the reassurance you need! xx

 

[misskth]

Just want to echo what everyone else said, take care of yourself x

 

[Tizz]

Thank you all for your reassuring replies!

The pregnancy was planned and we found out on Xmas Eve so it was a very special surprise.
The one person I want to tell most is my mum but bf really doesn't want us to tell anyone until 12 weeks so I haven't. We also live a couple of hours away from my parents and I don't want to tell them over the phone. We are going up in Feb the weekend after the scan and I can't wait!

I am scared about my midwife appointment. I lost 5stone before and I know I've put one on I'm too tired to exercise and am constantly hungry. Suffer from constant nausea but it doesn't put me off my food and I'm not throwing up (dread that!). I was also really ill over New Year but doctor didn't want to know so still getting over that.

To top it all off I run a team at work, two members are already pregnant and I'm keeping mine a secret but constantly surrounded by baby talk which I can't bring myself to enjoy in case they guess.

I just feel lost and bf is trying but half the time I snap his head off. He laughs because it's so out of character which just makes me angry and then I cry.

Feel so silly!

Xx

 

[CoolNoMore]

Hey Tizz, welcome to the madness!

I get that your BF wants to keep it a secret, but are really ok with keeping it from your Mum? That seems extreme to me (who very nearly told my Mum before my husband..ahem). There's so much up and down in the first trimester that I would have had a breakdown if I hadn't been able to spew to my Mum, Dad, sister and sister-in-law. That's my version of 'secret'!

In any case, do come on here and chat away. We'll always be listening!

 

[kumber]

Don't worry about the weight, you certainly won't put on 5 stone jn your first few weeks of pregnancy (also massive well done for losing that, that's amazing!), so please don't worry about that. You're eating loads because your body is suddenly growing a brand new, living body from scratch. That's some seriously hard work so enjoy food. It'll be your best friend over these next 9 months and you'll lose any baby weight fairly quickly afterwards anyhow cus you won't have time to eat

 

[Tizz]

Thanks ladies!

I discussed it with my other half today and he said that if I need to tell my mum then go ahead. Just him understanding that has made me feel a bit better but I still haven't told my mum yet. I'm worried in case I jinx it and I want to see her face when I tell her and have a big hug! But I can't go see her for a few weeks yet.

I don't know about you guys but I've never been so thirsty in my life! I also have to get up at least 3 times in the night every night - been that way since week 3. Probably the reason I'm so irritable!

Xx

 

[CoolNoMore]

Thanks ladies!


I don't know about you guys but I've never been so thirsty in my life! I also have to get up at least 3 times in the night every night - been that way since week 3. Probably the reason I'm so irritable!

Xx

Oh yeah, big time! Keep drinking though - I got so fed up of peeing every five minutes that I stopped drinking so much and promptly got a headache that couldn't be shifted with paracetamol. Rubbish! I have no problem doing away with booze, but maaaan I miss ibuprofen!