Name stealing???

[Cyprus08]

We're having a really hard time trying to settle on names that we like this time round. I also have a thing about wanting a name that I havent met more than 1 or 2 of and seen as though I have spent the last 13 years working with children and have such a huge family this is making things even harder

The last couple of weeks I had really started to love the name Isla for a girl (only ever met one). We live on a small army camp so we're a really close community where everybody knows everybody. There is another lady that I know that has just had her 20 week scan. When I asked her about it she told me they are having a girl and she will be called Isla Rose!!! Typical!!!

My question (even though long and drawn out lol) is if we were to stick with this name does it seem as though we have stolen it now?? I kind of wish Id have said when she told me "ooohh thats the name we love for a girl too" but I didnt, or am I completely overthinking this lol??? Thanks for your opinions xxx

 

[dragonlady]

my sister in law was going to be called isla but with her last name being white that soon got changed. her mother then went with kayleigh from a 80s song. it doesnt matter if some one else has the same name what matters is if thats the name u love for ur child and it suits ur child go for it. what about a different way of spelling it.

 

[Doob]

If I'm completely honest it would probably make me think twice. Are you good friends with this lady? Maybe it would be worth talking to her about it and just mentioning you've also chosen that name. I think that would be better than her just finding out because without prior warning she might just think you'd taken it from this recent conversation. I think honesty is the best policy here. I don't think there's any reason why they can't both have the name though if you're fine with that xx

 

[newbie1984]

I agree with doob. If I mentioned a name I like and then someone else took it I'd be a bit like eeeehhh?!?! But totally depends how close u are.

 

[JJ Mum]

myself , I would think twice, I know you shouldn't feel like you have to , but it would for me. I'm trying for a last baby. and my really good mate knows nothing about my ivf etc this year.. She fell preg by accident and is now 21 weeks, she is having a boy and told me her girls name was penelope, and then would be shortend to Penny.

She has forgotten I was naming my last baby Marina Penny if a girl and had thought of using Penny as a first name this time, (one of just 3 names I have) , and so I said wow thats a fav of mine, spooky. I may never have another baby , or a girl, but I couldn't use that now, in her head thats her girls name, she would feel awful. She desperately wanted it to be a girl. Plus I would want to be original in my group of friends... Same way her last baby was a Leo, I liked Leonie to go with my daughters name Briony, and had to rule it out....

I would never tell anyone my choice of baby names , for this reason...

 

[LouiseB]

I was thinking that I'd seriously rethink Isla is you want an original name. In the last couple of years it's gone from total obscurity to massively popular. Perhaps you don't work with many 2 year olds but it seems to me that it's everywhere.

I heard it on TV and I thought it was fab and if I was about to pop I would definitely have used it, but during my wait for a baby I'm quite relieved because everyone I know has it high on their girls list.

As for the stealing it, I think it totally depends on the situation. If you would be heartbroken not to use it, then use it. You might only get one little girl. Yeah, it might be a bit mean so depends on how much you like this other lady.

Strictly speaking names are on a first come basis among close friends and family, and she beat you xx

 

[Cyprus08]

Thankyou for all your honest opinions. The lady in question isnt exactly a friend - more of an aquaintance - but because of the way everybody knows everybody else here, she has obviously told people her choice of name and I think it would definately look as though I had pinched it!

Tbh I would be seriously annoyed too if I had told somebody my choice of name and 5 weeks later they appeared with their baby with the name I had chosen. JJ mum - I would also never tell anyone, apart from all you lovely ladies on here, names that we had chosen for those reasons too.

Oh well - time for a rethink. Thankyou all again xxx

 

[tambo1976]

I would call your baby whatever you want to call it! Think about in a few years time, that woman, who you openly admit isn't a close friend will be a distant memory so she really shouldn't come into the equasion.

If it was your brother or a best friend then you would feel comfortable enough to say "omg I chose that name too!" then have a giggle about it and one of you would choose a different name but hey... this woman will be a nobody in a few years and you will have your baby's name for life so I'd go for it xx

 

[Little_angel]

I would feel awkward, as you say because you didn't mention when she did about your choice. If you are very keen, I would talk to her beforehand, you never know she might change her mind anyway.

 

[BellaRiven]

Two of the ladies in my NCT group from antenatal classes have a boy called Max, I think as long as your happy with the name it shouldn't make a difference what other people think, sorry...

 

[Cyprus08]

thanks again ladies - some very good points to think about there xxx

 

[Kellybean]

Oh, it is blooooooming hard enough to come up with a name and a name that you agree on with your oh to let the fact that someone else has thought of that name too, to let you think twice.

Go for it, so what someone else has said that name first. I just wouldn't worry about it, even if the other lady gets a hump on (so?) it is your girl, your choice and a lovely name.

If mine is a boy it will be called Massan (pronounced Mason, Scottish spelling) my sister in law passed this on to er pregnant friend and they have decided on Mason if it is a boy. Yes, I was a bit upset as it felt like they were stealing it from me, but I then took it as a compliment and I cannot stop other people naming their boy Mason can I?

If it is a girl, she will be named Ruby. Now that is such a popular name but I couldn't care less, I love it. If my pregnant neighbour told me she was naming her daughter Ruby, I wouldn't change it.

I'm stubborn though, and tend to just go for things regardless, so it is just my opinion. I don't see the problem in the long run...initially she may be a bit shocked bit in the long ruin...no one will think about it again. So go for it...

 

[talulahgosh]

It would probably make me think twice about using the same name, but I don't think anyone would think you 'stole' their name and if they did boo hoo, they should have made up a random assortment of letters and created a truly 'uneek' name if they never want another person to be named the same.

A name isn't a possession and can't be copyrighted so if you love the name enough I'd use it regardless.

Isla is a pretty name

 

[MrsMushroom]

I have a friend who had her son 3 weeks before me. She knew the name I had chosen for my little boy and she called her son the same. She did ask me beforehand if I would mind, but I didn't. As talulahgosh says, you can't copyright a name and you are free to call your daughter anything you like.

If you are worried what she might think, talk to her before and tell her just what you've said here

 

[redbear]

I was at baby and toddler and a mum asked my daughters name i said 'Alice' and she looked shocked and she said 'i wanted Alice but while i was in labour my friend who was due a few days after me had her baby before her and called her Alice'.... her best friend who knew thats what she had picked used it, even though all her choices where modern ones. So in the end the mum called her baby a different name. I was shocked her best friend had done that and said 'well i was having Alice no matter what so we would have had kids with the same name because i wouldn't have changed it last minute'

I was just so shocked, i heard this mum saying to her sister later -that little girl is called Alice and looking sad. It obviously meant a lot to her poor lass.

However if its someone you hardly know then its not the same and doesn't matter!

 

[Doob]

I was at baby and toddler and a mum asked my daughters name i said 'Alice' and she looked shocked and she said 'i wanted Alice but while i was in labour my friend who was due a few days after me had her baby before her and called her Alice'.... her best friend who knew thats what she had picked used it, even though all her choices where modern ones. So in the end the mum called her baby a different name. I was shocked her best friend had done that and said 'well i was having Alice no matter what so we would have had kids with the same name because i wouldn't have changed it last minute'

I was just so shocked, i heard this mum saying to her sister later -that little girl is called Alice and looking sad. It obviously meant a lot to her poor lass.

However if its someone you hardly know then its not the same and doesn't matter!

Poor lady I'd have been gutted too. Not sure what I'd have done I'd hope stick with my choice but I'd prob have second thoughts too x

 

[redbear]

i felt gutted for her, she looked really upset... i would be more upset at the betral from my best friend than the name xx

 

[Iwant3]

sorry but 'Isla white' made me chuckle!

If you have your heart set on it then go for it, and if this lady ever says anything - say it was the name you always had picked out, but didn't want to upset her when she told you she was using it too.

 

[Olive]

I always loved isla. I still do but it's very popular up here now so I don't think id use it now...but we'll see. I'd just say to her, look that's our name too but I didn't know whether to say. I know it's difficult. X


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[Lolly85x]

I loved Isla. But then my friend had a wee girl called her Isla Rose. It's a really common name round about me just now.
I think the name thing is a grey area, I had a boys name and girls name picked. I had a boy and used my name, and now a girl who I only know through a friend has chosen my girls name. That wouldn't bother me. I think it would if I was in the same circle of friends. I wouldn't want people to think I had copied them. I'd mention its a name you liked too xx