mother in law grrrrrrrrrrrrrr

[mrz85]

well i did try and breastfeed but sadly it did not work out for us ! my mum in law has found out and been a bit nasty about it saying i am risking her health !!!!! hubby is such a mums boy and dont want to say anything

 

[Inga]

Hi, my mother in law has a lot to say, so I know how you feel. If you want advise , tell her to mind her own business. That her life is too boring so she is giving you opinions. She might cool off.

 

[daisyduke76]

I know you lot will think I'm bonkers, but I'd love it if my MIL ever took the slightest interest in our lives and proffered any kind of opinion! Still, I'm sure if she did, I'd be ranting and raving also.

I think I'd be tempted to try the guilt card and say, "Don't you think that this is upsetting enough for me right now, without you adding to it? I have done everything in my power to breastfeed my daughter, but I will not watch her go hungry."

Surely risking LO's health by letting her starve is far worse for her than not breastfeeding! I do feel for you, it must be hard also when your OH won't stick up for you either.

Big hugs. xxxx

 

[mrz85]

I know you lot will think I'm bonkers, but I'd love it if my MIL ever took the slightest interest in our lives and proffered any kind of opinion! Still, I'm sure if she did, I'd be ranting and raving also.

I think I'd be tempted to try the guilt card and say, "Don't you think that this is upsetting enough for me right now, without you adding to it? I have done everything in my power to breastfeed my daughter, but I will not watch her go hungry."

Surely risking LO's health by letting her starve is far worse for her than not breastfeeding! I do feel for you, it must be hard also when your OH won't stick up for you either.

Big hugs. xxxx

must b just as bad i suppose if MIL not taken intrest :/will see if she says anymore on the subject then i might try the guilt card lol

 

[BabysMomma]

How mean of your MIL.

I understand the anxieties that go with breastfeeding. I breastfed my LO for and 3 weeks and she lost so much weight and was very unhappy. My expressing was crap. I wasn't getting very much out. I was worried about how much she was actually getting which caused me stress and anxiety. And I felt a complete failure that I was giving up on what was supposed to be the most natural thing you could do for yor child. Pffft is what I say to that. You have to do what's right for you and your baby. I have a photo of my LO at 16 days old and OMG she looks so skinny to what she was when born.

The last thing you need is anyone, let alone your MIL putting their two pennies worth in when it's not really needed and unsupportive.

I would definitely say to her that you feel bad enough as it is and that you need her support rather than her criticism. It must be frustrating for you that your OH won't speak up to her on your behalf.

If people put more energy into giving support to one another rather than criticising then things would be a whole lot easier. I find that people are just too quick to judge/criticise others without knowing the whole picture and it's mean.

Hope you feel better about LOs feeds as there's absolutely nothing wrong in formula feeding and if works out best for you and baby, and if you can, just let MIL rattle on xx

 

[mrz85]

How mean of your MIL.

I understand the anxieties that go with breastfeeding. I breastfed my LO for and 3 weeks and she lost so much weight and was very unhappy. My expressing was crap. I wasn't getting very much out. I was worried about how much she was actually getting which caused me stress and anxiety. And I felt a complete failure that I was giving up on what was supposed to be the most natural thing you could do for yor child. Pffft is what I say to that. You have to do what's right for you and your baby. I have a photo of my LO at 16 days old and OMG she looks so skinny to what she was when born.

The last thing you need is anyone, let alone your MIL putting their two pennies worth in when it's not really needed and unsupportive.

I would definitely say to her that you feel bad enough as it is and that you need her support rather than her criticism. It must be frustrating for you that your OH won't speak up to her on your behalf.

If people put more energy into giving support to one another rather than criticising then things would be a whole lot easier. I find that people are just too quick to judge/criticise others without knowing the whole picture and it's mean.

Hope you feel better about LOs feeds as there's absolutely nothing wrong in formula feeding and if works out best for you and baby, and if you can, just let MIL rattle on xx

I found my little girl screaming as if she was starving when breastfed (Some people say it cant happen but since she is on forumal she is much more settled ..to b honest i am rather upset !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Kayelle]

Wow what a cow!! What a complete overreaction to something that is none of her buisness!
You do what you feel is right and if baby is happy your doing great! Try not to let her upset you x

 

[BabysMomma]

Do not listen to other people hun. It's your baby and you know what's best for her.

It's other people's silly comments that make you doubt if what you're doing is right. Breastfeeding works brilliantly for some people and not so brilliantly for others. And there is absolutely no reason for anyone to make you feel bad about using formula.

My DS is a happy, very healthy 15 year old and I only breastfed for 3 days with him. I had PND so it didn't go too well. As I mentioned, I breastfed my daughter for about 3 weeks and sadly it didn't go too well due to the amount of weight she was losing and frankly she wasn't getting enough. I felt enough of a failure (and still feel guilty at times) without people commenting.

Do not let these people's comments upset you hun. You're doing the best for your daughter. A happy Mum comes with a happy baby.

And I wonder what these people would say if you continued with breastfeeding only to find that your daughter got ill because she wasn't getting enough. Try not to listen. xx

 

[redbear]

^^ agree you can only try your best and its nothing to do with your MIL. I would say something to oh though not nasty but maybe 'your mum has upset me a bit' maybe if he says something it will go down better?im sure your OH will understand! xx

 

[mrz85]

thanxs ladies!!! Hubby is being such a idiot about it so making it a million times worse

 

[BabysMomma]

Some guys just don't get it. They don't understand how emotional and upsetting it all is I remember my OH wouldn't let it go and it put extra pressure on me to continue BF-ing but he thought he was encouraging me!

Hope he wises up and sees what a moo his mother is being. xx

 

[VikkiR]

Aww bless you, I'm flipping mad just reading it. Sounds like your OH was breast fed for too long, frigging mummy's boys. I'm afraid I wouldn't be able to hold back if my mil said that to me and I'd be telling her if she cannot be supportive or neutral that she's not welcome to visit unless she changes her attitude. If she feels she can be so blunt then she's fair game for you to be so, and if your OH won't support you, I'd be telling him where to shove his weenie as well. This is your body and your child. You certainly don't need anyone to pack your bags for the guilt trip xx

 

[mrz85]

oh he s deffo a mammys boy i akways saying it !!!!!!

 

[redbear]

Aww bless you, I'm flipping mad just reading it. Sounds like your OH was breast fed for too long, frigging mummy's boys. I'm afraid I wouldn't be able to hold back if my mil said that to me and I'd be telling her if she cannot be supportive or neutral that she's not welcome to visit unless she changes her attitude. If she feels she can be so blunt then she's fair game for you to be so, and if your OH won't support you, I'd be telling him where to shove his weenie as well. This is your body and your child. You certainly don't need anyone to pack your bags for the guilt trip xx

Sometimes i worry if im a ball buster because i would do this, i dont pussyfoot around DH with anything i dont keep any of my thoughts or feeling hidden even about his family. if he doesn't like it he can jog on as well! I think he is more scared of what i would say than his mum so would probably say something though- before i did!

 

[VikkiR]

I get mad at people in scenarios like this because us new mummies are emotionally vulnerable and if ever there was a time for other halves and families to hold their tongues and be supportive this is it. Kindness doesn't cost anything and if the eejits who upset these mummies can't just keep it shut, they deserve the full hormonal force as that is prob the only way to get through to their thick heads and tbh I wouldn't feel guilty about it x

 

[Kayelle]

Well they should act like parents and guide rather than judge then lol