It's So Difficult!

[Heulyn]

After all this business with the weird bleeding [click for dates] I had, I have absolutely no clue when I OV'd or when AF is due.

The last little bit of bleeding I had was on the 20th and 21st May, but that was only a two-day bleed, so probably not AF?

Anyway, if I count from the 21st, then I would have OV'd around the 4th?
Which means AF is due.... the 18th?

I took a HPT on the 9th, just to make sure, and it was a BFN, as expected.

So I'm waiting for the 18th before I test again...

IT'S SO HARD!!!!
I only have 1 test left, so I know I can't use it until then at the earliest...
but I am really struggling with the urge to POAS.
I'm dreaming about it even!!!

I feel like I'm gunna get a BFP, I'm having dreams about BFP's and I'm SSing like mad, and I "feel" PG....

BUT I keep telling myself to calm down, because otherwise I'll be so disappointed if I get a BFN, which is more than likely, and probably definately the case.

Sorry for the long rant... I just feel like I'm becoming a

 

[snoop]

Haha know that feeling coming addicted, I hope you get your bfp this month

 

[Heulyn]

Okay, I gave in and testing just now.
A as expected. But at least it took some pressure off.
We'll try testing again soon though, eh. :]

 

[JJ Mum]

Heulyn behave yourself !!!

I am ssoooo wishing that this month is your month Hun X

 

[Heulyn]

Haha, thanks Jen
I am fast becoming a !!!

I don't think it'll be my month tbh, it's all been a bit too messed-up these past few cycles - did you see the dates? it was mad.

But I think I'm now nearing the end of my ... or what I think could possibly maybe be my 2ww anyway!

The thing is, I "feel" PG, even though today was a BFN!
Oh well.... gotta hold out until the 18th, and if that fails, the 21st.
If AF doesn't come by then, that is.