Is there anything else we can try? :(

[xMillie]

Having a really bad time.


Yesterday I went back to my consultant so she could discuss the results of both HSG and Ultrasound and where to go from there. Apparently they could not find any reason as to why we are not getting pregnant and that they are referring us for ivf.

I feel so heartbroken right now as I feel like this is not the way things should be. Everyone around me, family and friends are popping out kids 1, 2, 3 even 4 and I'm sat here unable to even have one naturally.

Does this mean we are going to only ever have one child? if ivf even works for us? This probably sounds really selfish and greedy but I'm not sure I want to do this just for one child. I've always wanted a larger family and 3 children would have been my dream but it feels like it's all shattered right before me.

Then to top off my day yesterday I also found out I have cin3 and will need treatment for that. No idea on the details yet or how bad things are as the news was broke to me by the consultant when she was looking at my details on her computer. So now just waiting for a letter to come in the post.


People keep telling me things will get better and I should look on the bright side and I can't. I keep trying and honestly every time I do I just get more bad news.

I'm meant to be getting married Feb 2017 and people keep talking to me about that and I can't even get excited for that right now.
I'm sure most people would put TTC on hold before their wedding but I don't even feel like we can. It's been over 3 years already and I have to walk down the aisle 9months preg then so be it.

Sorry for the rant and lengthy post. I just feel so broken.



Each day I am taking:
Sevenseas Trying for Baby
Vitamin C
Vitamin D
and Zinc (was suggested I take this after finding out I have HPV)

My cycles are pretty regular (usually 27-28 days) and I OPK from cycle day 8/9 and do catch ovulation.
We DTD at least every other day and every day around ovulation. If around ovulation I'll put my legs in the air for at least 20mins lol.


Any more ideas on what we could do?
I feel like I'm stressing out about TTC more than ever now, which isn't going to be helping ahh!

 

[kittykitchn]

You don't mention your partner, what are his results like? So sorry you haven't got any answers, that's definitely one of the hardest parts I would say.

 

[phonixgirl]

Hi hun

I agree with Kitty, the not knowing is the hardest part. I was initially told there was no reason why I'm not getting pregnant either. Then I was diagnosed with PCOS.

I'd say go with your instincts - you know your own body. Are your periods regular? Do you get any spotting? Are your periods particularly heavy or light or painful?

Just because they haven't found anything yet, doesn't mean they won't in the future.

Everyone says to relax and I hate it when they say that (it didn't work for me anyway) but I had acupuncture (by a fertility specialist) and would recommend it to anyone. Reflexology is meant to be good too (and cheaper) but I use an app called Calm (which is free) for meditation and relaxation plus fertility yoga videos on You Tube up to ovulation. Xxx

 

[Tiptoes]

Hey hunni, so sorry you are feeling that way. I can relate to how you feel. We are in the unexplained category and I always feel that I am searching for an answer. I kinda feel that if I know what's wrong I can try and fix it but not knowing I just feel like I'm searching for a needle In a hay stack. Have you been tested for coeliac disease? This can cause infertility...we have had one failed ivf and a failed frozen transfer so I am going to ask for a hysteroscopy. Not sure if that's the same as a HSG? I have also read about ureaplasma which can cause infertility. If you don't fancy doing the Greek hidden infections you can order a test from health express. I asked my doctor but they didn't seem to know anything about it... Good luck Hun. I know it's hard. Had someone at my fitness group announce they were pregnant today. Had to leave the room. But stay positive. You will get your answers in the end xx

 

[phonixgirl]

Oh Tiptoes, how difficult. I didn't realise Coeliac on its own could cause infertility, thinking I should get tested considering I have PCOS.

I think an HSG is like a HyCoSy (which I've had) and just checks your tubes aren't blocked. A hysteroscopy will check for scarring and adhesions on your uterus which could prevent implantation or cause miscarriage. I might discuss a hysteroscopy, laparoscopy (to check for endo) and testing for Coeliac at my next appointment xx

 

[Tiptoes]

Hi Phoenixgirl, yeh coeliac disease can cause infertility. I stumbled across it by accident when I was looking on google at some other things. I got tested at the docs but it came up negative. The ureaplasma I found on the serum site and so sent off a sample here in the uk. I spoke to the docs he didn't know anything about it and said I needed to speak to the consultant so left a message for him at my old clinic and they are going to treat it at our follow up. Although now we are with our new clinic I will mention it to them and see if they can treat it sooner as our old clinic says there is no hurry and our appointment with them isn't until the end of jan. I have also had, full blood count, glucose, thyroid and some of the thrombiphilia tests but not all. Anti nuclear antibodies and thyroid peroxidase. I got these done at the doctors. There are a lot more factor v Leiden, activated protein c resistance, lupus anticoagulant and MTHFR ( not sure what that is ) but doctors couldn't do those ones. It's worth asking when you ask about coeliac xx

 

[xMillie]

More replies than I expected *hugs to you all*.


kittykitchn - The SA was pretty above average. So all is good with him right? Or are there other things we need to worry about there?
We both have to have blood tests before ivf though I don't remember what they're testing him for.
Yep, not knowing has been a nightmare.


phonixgirl - My periods have always been pretty normal I guess. Regular cycles usually roughly around the same length (give or take a day) and no unusual spotting or pains.
I just wish they could have found something already.
I'll def look into that app and other ways to try to relax, so thank you!


tiptoes - I'm sorry you're in the unexplained category too. I've not been tested for coeliac disease but I am willing to look into absolutely anything at this point, going to look into that too. Thanks!

 

[kittykitchn]

More replies than I expected *hugs to you all*.


kittykitchn - The SA was pretty above average. So all is good with him right? Or are there other things we need to worry about there?
We both have to have blood tests before ivf though I don't remember what they're testing him for.
Yep, not knowing has been a nightmare.


phonixgirl - My periods have always been pretty normal I guess. Regular cycles usually roughly around the same length (give or take a day) and no unusual spotting or pains.
I just wish they could have found something already.
I'll def look into that app and other ways to try to relax, so thank you!


tiptoes - I'm sorry you're in the unexplained category too. I've not been tested for coeliac disease but I am willing to look into absolutely anything at this point, going to look into that too. Thanks!

From what my consultant briefly said about sperm quality - although it's unlikely, even if the sperm count and morphology is good, there may be something genetically wrong with the sperm. So if there really is an unexplained fertility issue, it could be something along those lines. If I had gone on to IVF, I believe they would have done some kind of DNA investigation with OHs SA?
They only thing I can suggest is trying to boost the sperm (my OHs sperm are fine, but he tried conception tablets and Brazil nuts and we conceived a few months after him taking them every day - probably coincidence, mind)

 

[xMillie]

kittykitchn - Since we've been referred for ivf they might investigate the sperm then, we will find out I guess.
Interesting! Well like I said willing to try anything. So I will try convince him to take some conception pills too, thanks

 

[RAFMrs]

Throughout 8 years of infertility the only sperm interest from the doctors and IVF consultants (2 clinics) was the sperm analyst. It has only been my most recent clinic that did a sperm DNA fragmentation (private) which has thrown up more things wrong that we didn't know about otherwise x

 

[xMillie]

RAFMrs - ah, we're going through NHS at the moment but I guess we will find out if they're interested at some point. I think we were told it's about a 6month wait to be seen so got a while to wait to find out.

 

[KEW]

I won't bore you with my 4 year long TTC story, just wanted to say you are not alone in worrying about all this treatment only ever resulting in 1 child at best. That does not make you greedy or selfish, to me it is just being honest about how you feel. I had very similar feelings before we commenced treatment, I worried we were opening ourselves to a whole world of pain that we may never see then end of. I thought for a long time that it may well be less painful just to accept infertility than to open that Pandora's box only never to be able to shut it again. In the end though I came to the conclusion that I wouldn't be happy either way so I might as well throw everything at it.
I am now happily 31 weeks pregnant, but I have to stop myself thinking about the aftermath. I still have no firm reason for our problems conceiving and know the NHS will not help us conceive a sibling but I know with support of my husband, family and friends I will come to terms with that. I'm a control freak, but the best life lesson I can ever get from this experience is live in the moment. My husband and I sat down and discussed what we would like to do with our lives if we didn't have children (sell up and sail off round the world in our boat!!), it really helped us focus on the positives, so much so that we may go ahead with this plan with our little one in tow!!
Sorry if my ramblings don't help you much but this forum is great for talking things through and we are all here to listen so get in touch any time. Best of luck xxx

 

[xMillie]

KEW - Thanks hun. That's a really good idea I'll have to have a word with OH, maybe he can help us find some positives.
I'm finding it difficult to find any myself.

 

[Blueflower]

Most younger ladies who have ivf have spare embryos frozen, so you might get a sibling!

 

[attagirl_777]

hi dear xMillie, here's a virtual hug for you dear. It's hard not knowing. I am researching about acupuncture and is getting convince about it's benefit and some personal experience from people I know and here in the group. I would like to share this article so you can do some reading if you would like to give it a go.

 

[FBTTN8079]

I'm sorry that your going through all this Hun it really is tough, all the girls on here are amazing with support & advice for any questions you may have. i know it's not much consolation but our good friends have unexplained fertility, everything came back great for both of them, they e had to go down the if route but now have two beautiful girls xx