In tears...

[jarjar7]

I have reached the end of my tether now, I'm so upset I'm sitting here bawling. I am pretty sure I am ovulating and my window has been since Friday with ovulation yesterday and my OH has only managed it once, yesterday. His Son was here on Friday and we weren't together Saturday so he said we could do it Sunday, yesterday and today...Sunday came and went with him being 'too tired', managed it yesterday then today he phoned me and said he was going out tonight to watch the football so I said to remember what tonight was and he said he wouldn't drink too much. Anyway, he has come home and couldn't manage it, smelling of drink.
Now I think that's it, tomorrow is going to be too late and that is another month gone with nothing. I'm so upset and dont know what to do... It is just never going to be as important to him as it is to me, I feel like I'm going through this on my own and feel so lonely.

 

[Sam's Mum]

Even when they do want it just as badly as us I don't think they realise quite how we feel every month. Once is enough though, and it was well timed - remember the egg can survive for up to 48 hours and sperm live around 5 days so you do have a good chance (although I've had months like that too and all the facts weren't much consolation to me then, so sending you lots of s and ) x

 

[toni64539]

Oh sweetie. I know how you feel. It's awful isn't it feeling like men just arnt as bothered as us. But at least you managed it yesterday, remember some sperm can last up to a maximum of 7 days. Your not out till the witch gets you. Stay super super positive and try again for tomorrow as you never know. Cheer up chicken, it'll happen. Fx for this time

 

[NatEvz]

Keep your chin up honey (I know its easier said than done sometimes) like toni said, try to stay super positive xxx

 

[jarjar7]

I am trying to keep hold of the fact that we did it yesterday and will use that to try and stay positive but I just feel like I'm the only one bothered about it. One minute he is saying that he wants to do what he can to make it happen then the next he is saying he dont want trying for a baby to turn into a mission. I would never use a word like that cos to me I am willing to do ANYTHING to make sure it happens, nothing would seem like a 'mission' to me...I just dont know what to do anymore. We are doing all this his way so he feels comfortable with it but I just feel like he isn't taking my feelings into consideration at all. And all he has to do is sleep with me! I'm the one taking the folic acid, giving up the caffeine etc yet he acts like he has to do so much work for it.

 

[JJ Mum]

Hang in there Jar Jar, as the ladies have said you still did it at the right time and it only takes the once.

I would seriously have another chat with OH again after this cycle, has he seen you in tears about this? I wonder if he really knows how much turmoil this causes you over the month, maybee time to tell him.

Chin up chicken, still time X

 

[frankie707]

Sometimes men just dont quite understand that once we start TTC it becomes a massive part of our life. Hopefully he has done the job that once, fingers crossed for you, keep smiling

 

[SmallPurpleCat]

Try not to worry too much - that one BD could have done it but I can empathise - it is so frustrating. We think, eat, sleep, talk TTC and they often don't realise!

Try and have a chat about it to explain how you feel.

Goodluck

SPC xx

 

[jarjar7]

Thanks Ladies. I feel like I'm banging my head against a brick wall you know? It turned into an argument last night too so while I was sitting here I sent him an E mail that he would have got when he got into work today. It basically just told him how I felt, wasn't an angry E mail or anything. I just told him how I feel about it so he can read that without me getting angry trying to explain it to his face. So I shall see what that brings today, if anything.
He has seen me upset about it but probably not as upset as I was last night. He is a really awkward fella, you have to tread so carefully with him cos if he feels like he is being pressured into anything he'll go the complete opposite way.
Thank you though ladies. You really are so supportive and I dont know what I'd do if I didn't have you all to vent to! I am definitely going to hang on to the fact that we at least got one bd in and try to stay positive. xxx

 

[karenandbump]

Aw hon - hopefully you'll have a good chat about it when he gets home then.

It does only take once. Me and OH were ill in the lead up to OV last month so only had one 'go' at the right time and to my shock I got a BFP so ur still in hon - fingers crossed for u xxx

 

[nmf1987]

oh hun. hopefully he will start to understand.

im in the same situation as you to be honest.

oh told me to stop the pill but thats as far as he will discuss it. he is now just waiting for me to tell him im pregnant so apart from you lovely ladies on here im totally alone every month.

hope you get your bfp soon hun.

like everyone said it only take one little swimmer and if the witch stays away your a winner.

xxxx

 

[jarjar7]

Its such hard work, especially when you feel alone like some of us seem to. I never realised it would be this hard.
xxxx

 

[ema-lou24]

chin up hun xx

 

[Rosie's Mummy]

Men! Did they really evolve at a slower rate than us? Emotionally I think they did anyway! Im really sorry that you're having to go through this, I hope you get to talk about it and he truly understands the significance of all this to you xx

 

[jarjar7]

He doesn't seem to...he has just told me that this IS more important to me than it is to him but that doesn't mean he dont care. He wants to go back to not knowing when I'm OV and just seeing how it goes...Apparently I talk about it too much and put him under too much pressure. God I feel so low...
xxxx

 

[PinkPunch]

He doesn't seem to...he has just told me that this IS more important to me than it is to him but that doesn't mean he dont care. He wants to go back to not knowing when I'm OV and just seeing how it goes...Apparently I talk about it too much and put him under too much pressure. God I feel so low...
xxxx

I know that feeling well. Men just don't cope well with all this, they think completely different to woman. They don't see the rush for pregnancy, they just think it will happen when it happens whereas woman have a real deep desire to be a mother and it can completely take over our lives.

Its annoying having to keep it all inside and nto talk about it but whats probably why so many of us come on here because our fellas dont want to know! Please dont be disheartened by it, he sounds like he still really does want this but maybe just wants to enjoy it all more instead of it being like a chore for him, know what I mean? Its so hard though hun xx

 

[jarjar7]

I know, thanks for understanding! I have just wanted this for so long and I feel like it is within my grasp but he just keeps pulling it away from me inch by inch. He has a son already so that want isn't there for him like it is me.
God I'm having a bad day and what makes it worse is the not knowing if we were successful the other day, this could all be for nothing, who knows?
xxxx