Got a baby shower today

Discussion in 'Trying to Conceive' started by mrs nel, Jul 7, 2013.

  1. mrs nel

    mrs nel Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Mar 9, 2013
    Messages:
    1,939
    Likes Received:
    0
    Hi,
    One of my friends is having a baby shower today and I would rather pull my finger nails out than go. How bad is that? Out of 20 odd women going I am 1 of only 3 who do not have children and I know that the question will be poised!
    I feel rotten for even feeling like this as I know that they tried for a baby for over a year and that she was also attending the infertility clinic.

    Iv been so low this week, to the point iv not wanted to go outside. That is so not me at all. I know I need to pull it together but id rather sit and cry!
    I cant believe how hard im finding it at the minute. Does anyone else find that they go for months and they are fine then it hits them all of a sudden that they are struggling?
    xxx
     
  2. T84

    T84 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Dec 28, 2012
    Messages:
    5,576
    Likes Received:
    0
    Yep defo do hon! I've been fine and had a mini meltdown last night. 2ww are the worst!!
    I would go along and if anyone asks just say 'oh no there's still loads more we wanna do first' deflects it for me. I have one next weekend tho and ill probs know either way by then so not looking forward to it if its a bfn :-(
    Funny how everyone seems to be having one now, used to only be in America x x
     
  3. vic30

    vic30 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jun 11, 2013
    Messages:
    2,593
    Likes Received:
    0
    Oh hun, I really feel for you..It's totally understandable that you feel this way, and no, it isn't awful of you, It's natural. I'm sure when you get there it might be slightly better? It must be so difficult facing questions. Just keep your smile going and brave it if you can, you'll get your bfp soon I'm sure

    Take care x
     
  4. vic30

    vic30 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jun 11, 2013
    Messages:
    2,593
    Likes Received:
    0
    And I'm sorry you've been so low, hope the next few weeks are much better for you x
     
  5. OfficiallyMrsM

    OfficiallyMrsM Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Dec 19, 2012
    Messages:
    1,869
    Likes Received:
    0
    I know how u feel hun I had to go to my sister in laws baby shower and see her every weekend and I'm just so jealous of her but I'm happy at the same time. I suppose it's different for me as its going to be my niece or nephew so that means I will be the best auntie in the world but I can't wait to have my own mini me to spoil
     
  6. Clairabella

    Clairabella Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Oct 17, 2011
    Messages:
    1,403
    Likes Received:
    0
    I know how you feel and if it's going to upset so much do not put yourself through it and don't go. A true friend will understand I have missed a few then with others I went along and stayed for a short amount of time.
    I'm not a fan of baby showers I won't be having one if we are ever fortunate to get that far along.
    Hope you are ok Hun xx
     
  7. purplepebbles

    purplepebbles Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jun 21, 2013
    Messages:
    294
    Likes Received:
    0
    Can totally sympathise with you! OH's sister had one not long ago and I didn't go. Not totally for the reason that we are ttc, which they don't know about, but also I didnt really know anyone there, I would've been the only childless one and I couldn't justify the 50 mile round trip if I wasn't going to enjoy myself. Felt bad but had to think of myself! Xx
     
  8. mrs nel

    mrs nel Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Mar 9, 2013
    Messages:
    1,939
    Likes Received:
    0
    Thanks ladies,
    that's me home and I feel so pathetic for feeling envious of a friend. To make things worse there were a few newborn babies there too. I sat and participated in all the games and conversations that were on the go and put the smiley face on that we reserve for such situations. It's now over and my friend had a great time so that's the main thing.

    I'm not a fan of them myself as I feel it can be another expense - depending on how they are planned. For example I've been to 2 where we have had to pay to go!!! The girls planning them chose venues where the staff provided the food and drinks (well one on arrival!) and we had to pay £20 if we went and all for a couple of pitiful sandwiches! But then iv been to a few, like the one today were it was just in the house and the girls organising it did a fab job. I took the mum to be some nice toiletries that she likes and i'll buy the baby a gift when it arrives.

    Oh well, at least Andy won Wimbledon!
    xxxx
     
  9. T84

    T84 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Dec 28, 2012
    Messages:
    5,576
    Likes Received:
    0
    Woop woop was sooo pleased :)

    Aw glad its all over for you hon. Now you can relax a wee bit. X x
     
  10. scn

    scn Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Oct 23, 2012
    Messages:
    5,086
    Likes Received:
    0
    I'm not into baby showers myself. I think if people want to buy a gift for baby, they will do so when born and I wouldn't want anyone to feel obliged because of a baby shower. Glad you managed to make it through the day Lynne x

    Yahoo for Andy, it was a great match wasn't it?
     
  11. mrs nel

    mrs nel Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Mar 9, 2013
    Messages:
    1,939
    Likes Received:
    0
    Yep, our boy did well!
    I'm just glad it's over. I cant believe how much TTC messes with u,x
     
  12. T84

    T84 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Dec 28, 2012
    Messages:
    5,576
    Likes Received:
    0
    Whereabouts are you mrs nel? I'm in Edinburgh and the atmosphere was electric!! X x
     
  13. mrs nel

    mrs nel Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Mar 9, 2013
    Messages:
    1,939
    Likes Received:
    0
    Ooh,not far! I'm Glasgow! Yeh we had plenty of cheering going on and many folk had their tv out in the garden!

    Lynne,Xx
     
  14. Blueflower

    Blueflower Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jun 11, 2012
    Messages:
    5,376
    Likes Received:
    1
    Yes I agree that baby showers are a bit greedy and American! Especially if you have to pay! I've been invited to one by a younger relative and I'm not sure whether to go or not, there might be questions that I'd rather not answer! DH suggested I just buy her a present so I might just do that.

    Its so exhausting to stick on a smile isn't it! The only benefit I can think of is if its local and you don't have to drive so you can enjoy some wine when the pregnant or breastfeeding mums can't!

    We went to a childrens Birthday party at the weekend and I got the usual question and I managed to deflect it quite well I thought! I said "we don't have children yet but hopefully will soon, I've always loved children, I work with them" etc etc. Then the person who asked got the hint but had a safe topic of conversation to go onto! Phew! I used to just say that we don't have any yet but then they say things like "why not? You obviously love children, what's the delay?" which can be so unintentionally hurtful! :wall2:
     
  15. mrs nel

    mrs nel Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Mar 9, 2013
    Messages:
    1,939
    Likes Received:
    0
    Blueflower, im a teacher with infants so I get that question all the time too! Sometimes I just reply with "God I spend all day with them, why would I want to go home to them!"

    Today iv been ok so far, iv taken a car full of rubbish to the tip, went to Next to pick up an order which I was chuffed with as I had ordered a size 16 and an 18 and im pleased to report that the 16 was perfect. So that in itself put me in a great mood. I then hung out my washed bed lined, got the next load in and about to hang it out. I've also managed to walk the dog at a local park for 30mins so he is now exhausted and lying on the floor at my feet. For the rest of the day I am just going to chill out,make dinner then going to my old spin class at 8pm!

    Just on the count down to my fertile week so im starting to poas using my new CB advanced ovulation sticks on Saturday!

    How are you all?
    xxx
     

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
    Dismiss Notice