getting divorced....

[krystal&jack]

i split with DH last year (thats dickhead husband not dear ) to be fair on him he was nice person but we married too young and it wasn't right. It was my decision to end it cos i wasn't happy anymore.

Anyway it's been a busy year with Jack (jack is my OH's and not DH) and everything so we've only recently discussed divorce.

Just got a letter this morning from his solicitors starting proceedings on ground of my unreasonable behavior??

I don't quite understand what this means. does anyone know or have advice .

thanks

 

[Sarah&Braydon]

does that not mean like wwen u have cheated?
not sure exactly as never been married

 

[krystal&jack]

well i thought that but had a quick peek on internet and that would come under adultery which i never cheated anyway.

i just wonder what i did that was classed as unreasonable... or was ending the relationship enough grounds for that..

i'm so confused.

wierd as well. as much as i'm happy about me Jack and oh being a family it's quite sad to get this letter.

obviously never went into marriage thinking it would end

 

[reallyoldmum]

Most people use unreasonable behaviour as a reason to get divorced - it means you dont have to wait for a couple of years, in england you have to wait 2 years being apart to divorce if you both agree and 5 if one of the parties dont want too - they usually have to put in the petition several examples of why they dont want to be married to you any more - they can be really silly reasons or really serious ones it seems!

Just a word of warning - I was married for 13 years, put up with hell from my exhusband over those 13 years - he was eventually sectioned under the mental health act - but he divorced me for unreasonable behaviour - I didnt contest it as I didnt have the money too at the time and i really didnt think it would matter - but I really wish I had - it still upsets me to think he divorced me for lots of really silly stuff (like I let my brother stay in the matrimonial home when he was homeless!!) but no where is it written down what he put me through. Getting phonecalls from the hospital at 3.00 am when I had 2 small children because he had drunk so much he had slipped into a coma!! The time he hit me so hard on a night out with some friends that I was knocked out cold!!

I know I should let it all go but it does still hurt - so just make sure what he is divorcing you for is fair.

Good luck its a horrible time x x x x

 

[krystal&jack]

he was eventually sectioned under the mental health act - but he divorced me for unreasonable behaviour - I didnt contest it as I didnt have the money too at the time and i really didnt think it would matter - but I really wish I had - it still upsets me to think he divorced me for lots of really silly stuff (like I let my brother stay in the matrimonial home when he was homeless!!) but no where is it written down what he put me through. Getting phonecalls from the hospital at 3.00 am when I had 2 small children because he had drunk so much he had slipped into a coma!! The time he hit me so hard on a night out with some friends that I was knocked out cold!!

aww thats horrible

thanks for advice, i'm not sure whether to contest it or not. I just want it over quickly! i don't care what he puts down really i just want to see the reasons before i agree to it. Do you know if you get the reasons first?

 

[Babylicious]

should be unreconcilable differences I would have though

I divorced my ex for unreasonable behaviour because he was violent

 

[reallyoldmum]

If my memory serves me right they are listed in the petition - It is the quickest way I think but as I say please dont just agree and then regret it - its amazing how many times its been thrown back at me!! Every time he contacts the CSA he mentions it ........

 

[reallyoldmum]

Most people use unreasonable behaviour as a reason to get divorced - it means you dont have to wait for a couple of years, in england you have to wait 2 years being apart to divorce if you both agree and 5 if one of the parties dont want too - they usually have to put in the petition several examples of why they dont want to be married to you any more - they can be really silly reasons or really serious ones it seems!

Just a word of warning - I was married for 13 years, put up with hell from my exhusband over those 13 years - he was eventually sectioned under the mental health act - but he divorced me for unreasonable behaviour - I didnt contest it as I didnt have the money too at the time and i really didnt think it would matter - but I really wish I had - it still upsets me to think he divorced me for lots of really silly stuff (like I let my brother stay in the matrimonial home when he was homeless!!) but no where is it written down what he put me through. Getting phonecalls from the hospital at 3.00 am when I had 2 small children because he had drunk so much he had slipped into a coma!! The time he hit me so hard on a night out with some friends that I was knocked out cold!!

I know I should let it all go but it does still hurt - so just make sure what he is divorcing you for is fair.

Good luck its a horrible time x x x x

 

[krystal&jack]

he was eventually sectioned under the mental health act - but he divorced me for unreasonable behaviour - I didnt contest it as I didnt have the money too at the time and i really didnt think it would matter - but I really wish I had - it still upsets me to think he divorced me for lots of really silly stuff (like I let my brother stay in the matrimonial home when he was homeless!!) but no where is it written down what he put me through. Getting phonecalls from the hospital at 3.00 am when I had 2 small children because he had drunk so much he had slipped into a coma!! The time he hit me so hard on a night out with some friends that I was knocked out cold!!

aww thats horrible

thanks for advice, i'm not sure whether to contest it or not. I just want it over quickly! i don't care what he puts down really i just want to see the reasons before i agree to it. Do you know if you get the reasons first?

 

[Babylicious]

should be unreconcilable differences I would have though

I divorced my ex for unreasonable behaviour because he was violent

 

[reallyoldmum]

If my memory serves me right they are listed in the petition - It is the quickest way I think but as I say please dont just agree and then regret it - its amazing how many times its been thrown back at me!! Every time he contacts the CSA he mentions it ........

 

[krystal&jack]

should be unreconcilable differences I would have though

hmmm, thats the one i was trying to think of. I don't think i've behaved unreasonable. unless it counts that 3 months after i ended it i was with someone else and concieved Jack. But that shouldn't matter should it.

gonna call tomorrow and see solicitor and fingers crossed get things moving. Just want it over now

 

[M&Ms]

I started divorce proceedings against my husband on ground of unreasonable behaviour and he got a detailed list of everything in the divorce petition. Although he didn't agree with all of it, he didn't contest it but his letter through solicitors accepted that our relationship was irreconcilible (sp?). Weird cos there was nothing in there that I hadn't been moaning at him about for years

 

[*saulino*]

Hi

Just wanted to say i hope things work out for you hun

 

[krystal&jack]

Hi

Just wanted to say i hope things work out for you hun

thats really sweet - thanks hun

 

[krystal&jack]

thanks for the Gemma, I have an appointment with my solicitor next week so I'm gonna discuss with then as I'm not prepared to admit to something that I haven't done. At same time I want this whole sorry mess behind me.

Thanks for your reply

 

[suzy100]

when i got divorced, there were only 3 ways to do it
1. wait 2 years and its automatically annuled
2. on grounds of adultry
3. on ground of reasonable behaviour which covers just about everything

 

[suzy100]

3. i mean UN reasonable behaviour lol

 

[krystal&jack]

3. i mean UN reasonable behaviour lol

lol, t think reasonable behaviour sounds more apt... i put up with him being crap in bed for years... how reasonable can u get

 

[reallyoldmum]

Wish I had thought of that I used to write my shopping lists in my mind with my exhusband only ever got the fruit and veg though! I once pulled an apple from under the pillow and took a bite and he didnt even notice!!!