feeling down, need to talk

Discussion in 'Baby & Toddler' started by Layla, Mar 3, 2006.

  1. Layla

    Layla Well-Known Member

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    hi guys,

    im sorry for this but i need to get a few things out, i have no one else i can talk to about this so i thought i might be able to do it here.

    please dont judge me on anything i say now, i know some of it might be a bit in sensitive.

    basicly im feeling really crap right now, recently i have made up with my family, but living so far away from them has started to affect me, i havge no one here apart from jase and i feel like im missing out a bit when all my family see each other everyday and suport each other etc.

    i have just lost my best friend too, we have been friends for 9 year and this week we fell out over a bloke (my ex). now i know it shouldnt bother me that shes with my ex, and i know i should be happy for her, but i just cant be, and because of that, its cost me our friendship.

    i havent been feeling to great lately either, feel a bit fluey and very tired, i was hoping to get a rest this weekend, but its my daughters birthday so jases parents are coming down to stay, plus charlie has a party i have to do.

    and also, this is the thing im most owrried about admitting on here, but im really hoping im not pregnant, i know i have been TTC and at teh time i really wanted too, but the last few days i have changed my mind, i really dont want to go through it again just yet, i want to enjoy Coby and have time out, but im worried in case its to late. im sorry i know this is very selfish of me to post this here, but i dont have anyone else to talk to right now, i dont know, maybe its hormones(if i can still blame things on them) that made me want another baby to quick, or maybe its them thats made me change my mind.
    im just so confused right now and feeling crap about everything.

    anyway, i have whinged enough, sorry again to post this, but thanks for reading

    xx
     
  2. minikins

    minikins Well-Known Member

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    Hi Babe,

    Sorry you are having a crap time of it.

    Family, friends and babies can do our heads in at the best of times. It's funny but have a new baby makes you think of these things more and how important they are to you etc.

    I totally understand about the family stuff, I have felt very distant from them in the past but now since I have had Dom they have been amazing and I really appreciate what they do for me and I don't know what I would do without. So it's understandable you now want them to be near.

    Sorry to hear about your mate, the thing with good mates is that you can have these spats then it all comes right in time. She may not even be with your ex for long so best let the dust settle and everything to calm down before you decide never to see her etc, just keep away at the mo.

    With regard to the baby stuff, I agree with you 100%, when you have a new baby your fillings go mad with the thought of having another and it's crazy. It's the old hormones I think as I have had this too, but I like you want to enjoy Dom without being distracted from all the stuff, we have plenty of time.

    I can understand why you are confused now with the fact hitting you that you may be pregnant. I know it sounds hard but try not to worry until you have a BFP and if you do I suppose you just have to do what you feel needs to be done, and if you don't have it, go phew then start using contraceptives for a while until the time is right again ;)

    Hope that helped babe !

    xx
     
  3. leanne

    leanne Well-Known Member

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    sending you big hugs layla, keep your chin up babe xxx
     
  4. beanie

    beanie Well-Known Member

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    (((Layla)))), hun don't beat yourself up. You have had so much happem the last year, with the wedding and Coby, and I'm not surprised you are feeling down. This time is the time when we most need our families, and if there are any issues with them it feels so bad. I kind of understand about the being away from family thing. My sister lives miles away and I really miss her, more then usual. Its also made me miss my parents more, who I haven't seen in ages so I think it is normal to feel like you are mising out. The situation with your friend won't be helping much either, I hope that resolves itself soon.

    Hormones are funny things, I even got broody the other day and I really am scared to have another baby seeing as I struggle with the one I have. I also want to concentrate on Seren till she is a bit older. You are allowed to change your mind, there is nothing wrong with that. I agree with minikins, wait and see what the result is and then go on from there. I hope it is the result you want. No-one is judging you, we are all here for you.

    Take care of yourself babe

    xxxxx
     
  5. Urchin

    Urchin Well-Known Member

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    Awwww Layla sorry you're feeling down.

    I know I have said this before, and please don't think I'm a nag, but you have to trust me on this one: find out about a local baby group and get yourself there for a chat and a cuppa...I promise it will make a huge difference. I know how it feels to be stuck in the house and feeling lonely.
    I know you're shy, but new friends won't just come knocking on your door, and maybe they're in need of someone just like you! They could be shy and really struggling, and an experienced mom like yourself might be a godsend to them!
    You can find groups online or look for posters in your doctors/clinic or supermarket.

    (((HUG)))
     
  6. Layla

    Layla Well-Known Member

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    thanks guys

    im going to ask my HV about baby groups next week, fingers crossed it goes well
     
  7. minikins

    minikins Well-Known Member

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    They are great you can compare babies and talk about stuff other than babies. I have met many great mum's through the groups and that has helped keep me sane.

    Sami - yes I know what you are thinking - sane? !!
     
  8. michelle82

    michelle82 Well-Known Member

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    Aw hun keep your chin up, I'm so glad I have my family to help me otherwise I dont think I would have coped half as well so to do what you are on your own is fantastic, I agree you should find a baby group as its always good to talk to people on your wavelength its amazing to find that your not the only one having crap days etc! I'm starting baby massage with Matthew on the 17th for 5 weeks then the week after theres a weaning workshop where you get a free blender! I'm all for freebies! :D
     
  9. Flossy82

    Flossy82 Well-Known Member

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    Hi yah huny sorry to here this well if you want to chat you have my msn so you are more than welcome to im always here for you and anyone!
     
  10. Urchin

    Urchin Well-Known Member

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  11. *saulino*

    *saulino* Well-Known Member

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    Hi Layla

    Im sorry your feeling so crappy hopefully it wont last long. and wait a few days maybe you wil realize yyou dont wanna ruin your friendship with your mate.

    Ive had friends date my exs and i was mad at first then i got over it and talked to them both again.

    Also its okay to change your mind once in a while and hopefulyl you will get what you want and who knows maybe tom you will hope you are preg??

    Take care and try and relax a little this weekend

    Also
     
  12. Tiny Sue

    Tiny Sue Well-Known Member

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    Hey Layla...

    Doesn't sound like whinging to me! While i haven't felt broody over the last while, I have had my worries and moments of feeling down. In fact, i think my fear of getting pregnant again so soon, since it happened so easily the last time, is behind my lack of libido and inability to relax when it comes to "cuddles". We have to get over that hump though...

    Anyway, if you want to talk, about ANYTHING - PM me and we'll swap emails. We all need a friend.

    PLUS the mother/baby group would be good. I actually must look one up around here, I lean way too much on my SIL for advice, i think.

    Gotta go, guests coming for lunch, it's 11 am and I'm still in my dressing gown, i've a pasta bake to do!!!
    Sue
     
  13. Layla

    Layla Well-Known Member

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    thanks guys
    xxx
     

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