Dilemma!

[SarahLouB]

Me and my husband have had our names picked out for ages, long before we found out I was pregnant. I am sure I am having a girl but I will find out on Wednesday for definite.

Anyway, we haven't told anyone our names because we want to keep them a surprise so no one has any clue apart for people on this forum

The other day my sister was trying to get me to tell her the names and she said "well as long as it's not Cecilia because I've always wanted to use that name"

Well that is our chosen name!!! It's our nan's name so that's why she also has it in mind.

My sister is only 24 and a long way off having kids so I don't know what to do?

We did have another name in mind which was Amber but we were still going to have Cecilia as the middle name.

What would you do?

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[tambo1976]

I would choose it anyway, she's your nan too!! You can't just expect to bagsy a name years in advance and expect everyone else to not use it x

 

[Bethi]

No way would I be 'banned' from using a name by someone who wasn't even pregnant. She may not even be able to have children. Or it may be a decade down the line and she goes off the name by then. Or maybe she only has boys. There are endless possibilities, and it all boils down to: one of you has a baby to name now. One of you doesn't. No brainer.
And if you use it, she could still have it as a middle name for any DD she my have.
People don't own names. And it isn't fair to lay on the guilt by 'bagsy-ing' a name.
I would DEFINITELY go ahead and use it. Without hesitation (although I can see why it has thrown a spanner in the works. Very unfair though).

 

[Clairabelle]

I'd use it still if that's the name you definitely want. Like others have said she isn't even pregnant yet so as far as I'm concerned it's first come first served. She'll probably be a bit peeved when you tell her though. I really wanted to call my eldest ds Ashley when I was expecting him, but my bro and sis in law had their ds 4 months before me and called him Ashley - I was gutted but to be fair hadn't even told them that was a name I was thinking of so it isn't like they'd pinched it off me. But now I'm glad it worked out that way cos I couldn't imagine him as an Ashley now and definitely suits the name he's got. So I'm sure by the time your sis gets pregnant they'll be a name she wants even more xx

 

[Kay Kay]

I would say if you have the baby first then you have first dibs on the name. It's unfair of your sister to do that. Lovely name btw x

 

[SarahLouB]

Just for the record, my sister has no idea still that I am planning to use that name so it's not like she has told me I can't use it or anything!

I think you are all right though. I think I just worry too much about her reaction but I'm sure she'll be happy

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[CARNAT22]

Would you not confide in her that you want to use that name??

That way it is less of an issue when bub arrives?

Once you point out that she is a long time away from kids / may have boys etc I am sure she'll be fine.

I love Amber by the way. It's my cats name but now I wish I'd named her something more 'catty' as I seriously love it for a baby girl

xxxxxxx

 

[SpinSugar]

I would definitely confide you want to name. You never know, it could have been an off hand comment (to provoke a reaction) or she could genuinely have her heart set on the name!

Having been in the other side, its so gutting. I told my Pg friend my planned baby name last yr and guess what she called her baby! And it wasn't even on the cards for her. However had she told me I'd have been ok with it iygwim, would have been happy to have helped.

I would still have the name, but just explain it to her in advance. She can still use it if she wants it anyway! Esp if you only use it as a middle name.

Reminds me of the friends episode where Rachel wants Monica's chosen name

Xx

 

[SarahLouB]

Thanks everyone for your thoughts.

I probably going to find out I'm having a boy now after all that!!!

 

[JJ Mum]

good luck for your scan, if you do find out its a girl, then do speak to her, tell her you didn't say when she mentioned the other day about the name , because you thought if you had a boy it wasn't an issue, but now that its a girl you wanted to tell her that that was your name too , your first in queue.

My younger brother always wanted one daughter called zoe, (it was odd as he went on about this from a small child! ) My sister and i both said wed never use this name (were older), and we both had one girl each and luckily we both are not fans of the name, but left it for him. He went on to have one child 5 years ago and his wife wouldn't let him use it! so he got away with Chloe! So it just shows you things change and so you have to go with what is right for you..