Depressed, am I the only one?

[Dovekie]

I have suffered from depression all of the way through. I think I may have been a little depressed before I got pregnant. A lot has happened to me during the pregnancy, which I believe has made it worse (unplanned pregnancy with very new boyfriend, lost my job, my house, my independence, living away from family and friends). The worst thing has been moving in quickly with the baby's dad and not getting the support I needed from him. I'm convinced I wouldn't have suffered as much if he'd been more supportive. Count your blessings having a supportive a partner!

My treatment was a bit of a mess really. I was receiving telephone counselling at first, but when I moved house they signed me off. It took a long time to register again. When I finally spoke to someone I'd decided to move again! I've never been offered pills and wouldn't have taken them anyway. I will consider them after the birth though, if they take the edge off.

I don't know what to suggest really. Just open up to your midwife. I was sent a special midwife that dealt with mental health problems, but I only saw her once.

I'm really worried about getting postnatal depression, so I'm going to look into my options for after the birth - which is only a week, or three, away!

 

[CoolNoMore]

My treatment was a bit of a mess really. I was receiving telephone counselling at first, but when I moved house they signed me off. It took a long time to register again. When I finally spoke to someone I'd decided to move again! I've never been offered pills and wouldn't have taken them anyway. I will consider them after the birth though, if they take the edge off.

I don't know what to suggest really. Just open up to your midwife. I was sent a special midwife that dealt with mental health problems, but I only saw her once.

I'm really worried about getting postnatal depression, so I'm going to look into my options for after the birth - which is only a week, or three, away!

This is a huge issue in my experience - help is there, but you really have to persist and try to stay sane while you get passed around. It's really tough. Dovekie, you've had quite the ride.

I thought I was doing ok, but OH has just had a bit of a rant about how I'm his biggest source of stress. I know it's difficult to live with me, but it's pretty difficult being me a lot of the time and I really thought I was doing better. Looking forward to giving birth and taking something that will level me out.

 

[SalisburyMum]

Stupid isn't it, you need to be proactive to get help when really the last thing you need is to be proactive or can be is proactive.

All I want to do is sleep, let alone fend off bloody arsey school run mothers and consultants.

Kids got into my room yesterday and ripped up my pillow with the dog, I was so, so upset that I shouted at them and they cried, I felt awful, absolutely sodding awful, then I slept for 10 hours and felt a lot better. Been a hard few weeks

 

[SpiritedAway]

So sorry to hear that Dovekie I can sympathise with a difficult start to pregnancy. This was really difficult at first, we lost 3 weeks before i caught with this baby so we both struggled with not getting too excited and family telling us not to too as I had a little scare. Then my dog of 8 years passed after Christmas and my 12 week scan, he was a big big help with my anxiety and depression in the past as hubby bought him for me for that reason. It broke my heart and i have struggled a fair few months not being able to deal with an empty house especially during the day.

I'm exactly the same, keep positive and i know its hard to do so but tummy time has really helped me with me and most importantly me time. Just take time out to look after you, as you're just as important.

Sailsburymum I think you have to push with it, I have two consultants and midwife appointments too but ive had no chance to say "hey im struggling a bit over here". Its just so in and out see you 4 weeks. Also no one says how are you doing mentally with this? It's all physical changes.

Sleep what is sleep lol? I have the most shitty night sleeps in the world. I wake almost hourly my sleep is so broken, I am up at 7/8am with hubby for when he goes to work and then crash at 9am till 11ish and sometimes afternoon naps. Never been so tired.

I've been better these last two days, haven't cried or had a melt down lol.. I'm wondering if the throat infection i have had a bit of an impact on how I was so I kinda burnt out from being on the go and well hormones. I don't trust it though.. I am absolutely exhausted all the time so it is a big trigger for me to just crash and cry from tiredness. I think I still need to discuss it with midwife or gp.

I guess when i say she might be judging me it's more in my head? Although she's not the easiest of midwives to be open with either.. When i first met her she came into my house complaining about my cat being there so i removed her and then saying she had just been to a house that "stank of curry". Which I was a bit taken back by and then another midwife called her and she literally said with me there "No im with the lady now, no no it's not the same girl we were thinking of". Which I couldnt believe.. my mum met her too and sort of had the same vibes.

So I have just been leaning on my hubby for support to get through this which i hate to do because he has stresses of his own. I started going up for a bath and having baby bonding time every night now or play music to bump in the day which has been really good for me. I think my panic was I was a bit distanced from him with this "melt down" so making time for him has been a big deal.

I take each day by day, depression is so unpredictable especially with all these hormones surging around. I've had the most unexpected crashes in the past, im so stubborn too i just carry on till it's too much for me.

 

[SalisburyMum]

Your midwife sounds like a dick.

You need to have that connection with your midwife, if I were you I'd be putting in to change for another, which you are well within your rights to do.

I was comfortable enough with my midwives on the home check to tell them not to eat the brownies (stoned midwives is not what we need) and have a right giggle.

The woman who shouted at me in the playground last week had a go at the sweetest old lady who was parked picking her kids up today.... I think she's maybe going a bit mad? So that's made me feel oddly better.

My dissertation is due in Tuesday week, so I'm sort of really focused on that which is helping my mood.

Though it does mean the house is a state which isn't good for my head. Also I'm struggling with money, I am supposed to be on maternity but they've still not sorted my pay, which is a nightmare and Not Good for the head.

Anyway we are keeping on keeping on. 8 weeks to go.

 

[kumber]

You're doing amazing ladies, keep going! You. Can. Do. This!!!!