Delivery after 3rd degree tear

[Juzza]

Hiya,

Not even preggers again yet but desperately trying! Can't help thinking about the whole birth thing again though. I had made up my mind to have a c-section next time due to the risks of tearing again but recently i've been changing my mind every other day because they say second births are easier and maybe also i'll know what to expect and not be so exhausted or terrified plus c-section is a DEFINITE injury whereas i could be lucky this time.

HELP anyway - really interested to know whether any of you mums or mums to be have experienced 3rd degree tear and had a better second birth or what your plans are for delivery after 3rd degree tear.

Sorry loads of questions just building a case for and against.

Cheers me dears
Juz xxx

 

[nathanmum]

i never had a 3rd degree but my half my right labia fell off and i had a 2nd degree perineal tear. i would defo go for a natural delivery next time as at the end of the day an elective c section isnt the best thing for the baby. they said i would have to go to theatre with my tear but i refused. some people have awful tears with theyre first and never tear again, im gonna cling to that hope

 

[Juzza]

Thanks for your reply OMG - how the hell did your labia fall off?!
I had to have forceps with episiotomy after failed ventouse. I'd had a spinal as they thought they were gonna have to do a c-section so i couldn't feel my contractions which is why i then tore from front to back, internally and externally. An hour in theatre, a litre of blood and a re-opened wound 3 days later.

I know how dangerous c-secs can be but i can never help thinking about being incontinant at 26 - i don't care about wee wee its the other i'm terrified of after taking 9 months to heal this time! And then i fanatsise about a natural home birth...

 

[nathanmum]

my labia fell off when he turned to deliver the shoulders. that was the most painful bit of the whole birth!
its your decision i was incontinent(wee wee wise) for the first few weeks and it scared me to death so i know where your coming from. have you looked on the homebirth website i always found it really reassuring for stuff like this.

 

[foxymum]

i have a friend who had a terrifying experience with her 1st child & ended up tearing front to back & with her 2nd child she did go for an elective c-section.

 

[Riley's Mommy]

i never had a 3rd degree but my half my right labia fell off and i had a 2nd degree perineal tear. i would defo go for a natural delivery next time as at the end of the day an elective c section isnt the best thing for the baby. they said i would have to go to theatre with my tear but i refused. some people have awful tears with theyre first and never tear again, im gonna cling to that hope

OMG

 

[budge]

i never had a 3rd degree but my half my right labia fell off

jesus wept

 

[Miracle babe]

Hi hun, I had a rotten first delivery. After 27 hours ended up with an episiotomy and forceps and tore both external and internal. Had to be readmitted to hospital for reconstructive surgery so as you can imagine shat myself at the thought of delivering naturally this time. I had councelling to help with what they call secondary tocophobia. I went on to have an 11 hour labour (little toe rag was back to back bless him or would have been shorter lol) a straight forward delivery and although I did still tear and yes had another episiotomy I wouldn't change a thing. It was a wonderful experience and seeing my son being born and feeling it was fab in a warped sort of way.
You can check out my birth story on the new arrivals board, probably a few pages back now lol, he arrived 30th Sept.

 

[Juzza]

Thanks for all your replies chicks.

Foxymum- did your friend have a better overall birth experience with the sec? And was her recovery shorter/longer?

Miraclebabe - did you take as long to recover this time? I couldn't drive/sit/sleep properly for months after DS.

Sorry bout all the questions - in a massive quandary!

Juz x

 

[foxymum]

Foxymum- did your friend have a better overall birth experience with the sec? And was her recovery shorter/longer?



yes , she had a fab experience compared to the 1st.
she said anything was better than Emilys birth (1st one)
recovery was probably not as long as the tear, plus she said with a c section you know the recovery period will finish, where as with the tear, you're never sure.
good luck.

 

[Juzza]

Cheers chick

 

[Urchin]

I'm so glad you asked this as I was wondering too.
I had a second degree tear with Brody and if I do decide to have another it will be a huge worry....the thought of becoming incontinent for LIFE scares the living daylights out of me!

Is a C-section THAT bad?!?

I'm so confused about the whole thing!

 

[Xena]

I had a 3rd degree tear too and am worried about this next delivery.

I wouldn't go for a c-section though. Even a bad tear is better than major surgery.

 

[prickleyfairy]

I also had a third degree tear from front to back inside and out-and was in agony for weeks after....still hurts when we have cuddles. We've talked about trying again at the end of the year but am sooo worried about having another bad tear. Is it easier the second time-could you tear in the same place as before?

Amy xx

 

[Miracle babe]

It took me 6 months to recover from having my first but that was just the physical scares. I also had Post traumatic stress disorder and suffered flashbacks for 2 years. This one was a 4 week recovery and I'm ready to take on the world with no emotional baggage

 

[Juzza]

Most sites/articles/books seem to suggest that subsequent deliveries are easier and shorter as the birth canal has alreay been stretched but surely that doesn't apply to your actual vaginal opening. I know that even though they did a sh*t job of stitching me up it's quite tight down there (sorry!) and i do worry that the weakness is there-in the scar.

All the consultants say that the risk is greater but they can't say if it WILL happen again. I'm not really worried about the pain as i had a pretty gruelling back labour with Jakeypops but i am so worried about incontinence esp. as i still have what they call flatus incontinence which in common terms is the farts (sorry again!) and the docs are suggesting that this might make it even more likely to tear again.

I've heard some horrible c-sec stories yet people i know who have had one seemed to recover a hell of a lot quicker than me - and i'm not demeaning anyone who had a sec but i always think that surely its easier to cope with a stomach wound than one you have to wee and poo through!

Saying that have read some lovely home birth stories esp. Phillippa and some on the IMA site which all seem to have been successful rip free births after 3rd degrees. So there must be hope hey?

Thanx for all your replies girlies x

 

[Urchin]

I'm still leaning toward C-section. Like you say it's not just the posibility of a tear I'm worried about....I'm worried about never being able to go to the loo properly ever again!

 

[Juzza]

Totally agree 100%. I think i could probably go through the months of pain and upset again, i could even cope with the sadness i felt this time when i couldn't breastfeed jacob because of the sheer pain of sitting/lying down. But what i couldn't cope with is if my relationship were to end because i became terrified of sex or shitting myself, or iff i developed PND! But the same could be said of infected c-secs or the risks on the baby.

But then i've read stories and heard from friends that have had successful second deliveries - i guess its just a big unknown and a BIG game of russian roulette. So unfair - as even though it sounds crazy i really think i want to go through labour again - it was a magical though shocking experience. Hohum...