Contraception - Sterilisation (ttc'rs, please dont read)

[lauramumof2]

I didnt want to make anyone trying for a baby sad or angry.

Has anyone considered this as a permenant form of contraception. We discussed dh going for the snip but I decided that I would do this instead.

It seems less acceptable somehow though.

We definately do not want any more kids but I wouldnt tell my mum. She would be horrified at the thought of me having this op.

I do not want more children and do not want to risk having an unwanted pregnancy.

Am I selfish if its what we both want.

Any opinions appreciated.

 

[sam96031]

i think thats between you and your OH my Mum had that done and was quite open about it at the time (7 years ago) a few people were a bit put out including me but now that im more mature and understanding i think it was the best thing for her in her situation. so long story short it you decision and noone elses if you dont want to tell anyone dont

 

[Dee1985]

how old are you hun?

its something i would NEVER have done,
i no a few different women whose husband has left them late 30's they move on find some one else but cant have children together.

not that you and your OH are going to split up but i just always think about "what if"
and i dont think they would do it to you.

my friend is 27 5 kids to 5 different men and they wont do her she is to young

 

[foxymum]

i want Rich to get the snip, we have 3 kids together & he also has a 14 yr old, so we have 4 kids & i never!!! want anymore adore my babies though.

he is 37 & i am 30, i wouldn't consider female sterilisation as its more hassle & easier for the man.

of course you are not selfish, you will probably have to have some from of councelling before to make sure its what you want, but at the end of the day obviously the decision is down to you 2 & (normally) can't be reversed easily.
good luck with whatever you decide

 

[budge]

I didnt want to make anyone trying for a baby sad or angry.

Has anyone considered this as a permenant form of contraception. We discussed dh going for the snip but I decided that I would do this instead.

It seems less acceptable somehow though.

We definately do not want any more kids but I wouldnt tell my mum. She would be horrified at the thought of me having this op.

I do not want more children and do not want to risk having an unwanted pregnancy.

Am I selfish if its what we both want.

Any opinions appreciated.

if you feel you have completed your family and you feel happy to have the op then do it.
you're not selfish you are sensible.

how old are you though?

 

[violet-glow]

To write this thread to me sounds like you have doubt in your mind about going through with it. You ahve to be 110% sure that this is really what you want. This is your body remember so only you can decide. Dont let your mum or OH influence your decision. Have a good long think about it on your own for a bit. You might change your mind about it a few years after you have had it done and by then it would be to late.

Sorry ill shut up now xx

 

[lauramumof2]

Mmmm, interesting comments.

Im only 29 so thats probably not going to go in my favour.

Its difficult to explain but I want the decision taken out of my hands and for the reproductive part of my life not to be an issue.

 

[Gem & Leland]

depo ? little less perminant ?

 

[budge]

Mmmm, interesting comments.

Im only 29 so thats probably not going to go in my favour.

Its difficult to explain but I want the decision taken out of my hands and for the reproductive part of my life not to be an issue.

thats young. my doctor is very reluctant to do me (im 33) or hubby even though hes 44 He says i am too young and might want another one. its so permanant. you have to be so sure! i won't have it done. no way

 

[kimmumof2]

hi hun its entirely ur decision as its ur body. u need to ask urself if u r sure u wudnt want any more children with your OH or with anyone else. if you are sure you dnt then i cant see a reason why not. my mum had this done at the age of 23 straight after my sis was born and she has never turned her bk on decision. you may have to convince docs tho so u need to be 120% to convince them. good luck with woteva u decide.

xxxxx

 

[katyk]

Its difficult to explain but I want the decision taken out of my hands and for the reproductive part of my life not to be an issue.

Depo then or something like that? I knew a lady who had her tubes tied, (must've been about 34) but she had health problems -serious bipolar disorder and was in the hosp. several times a year. Her husband was her carer, and they already had 2 kids.

I can see how if you have health problems or had a really evil case of post-natal depression, you might want this op, otherwise it seems a bit drastic if you could just have a coil or depo or something

 

[Baileysmummy]

hun..

Im 25 only just and im getting sterlised on 22nd June, i have made my choice and the docters are happy to perform this operation for me, i have my children and i feel the same as you, i dont want to risk any more children coming along, i think if deep down if this is what you want then the docters will understand, they will try and puruade you out of it like me, but be persistant if its what you want, but like others have said you need to be 110% sure..
make the choice for you and not those around you, im quite lucky i have the support of my mum and dad, good luck with what you decide!

 

[Sammystar]

It's an immotive issue for many. I can't speak for myself but I've talked to my mum at length about it. I'm the youngest of three and I wasn't planned. They couldn't really afford to have more kids and they knew they definitely didn't wan't more after me. My dad refused point blank to get the snip (bloody whimp!) so my mum was more or less left with no choice. She had it done whilst still in hospital having had me. She went through emotional hell afterwards and regrets it to this day, despite knowing she didn't want more kids.
She says she can't really explain it, it just really traumatised her.

I won't be getting it done. After 15 yrs on the pill and three pregnancies and births, it's my man's turn to do his bit now!!

 

[Melanie]

We have friends who have two children and dont want anymore at all. Because like us they are only in their 20's they wouldnt sterilise her but would give him the snip so that's what they had done.

My cousin is 25 and has 6 kids, the youngest is the same age as Thea and has massive problems from my cousin drinking and taking drugs (she says she didn't know she was pregnant until she collapsed and was scanned when she was 29 weeks and the baby was born at 32 weeks). She desperately wants to be sterilised, she has been asking since her third baby. They still wont do her. She has also had an abortion since her youngest was born 8 months ago, when she went to her 10 week check up she was pregnant again! I really cant understand why they wont do her!

I think you'll have a fight on your hands hun. Its much easier to get a doctor to agree to give the bloke the snip!

 

[libs]

Why do you think it would bother us TTCers? This is your body and your decision.

 

[fothers]

My friend was considering this but the doctor said 'what if both your children were killed in a car accident- could you be sure you wouldn't want to try again in that situation?' and she couldn't. They are using an IUD for now.

 

[muppetmummy]

I definately don't think it's selfish. It's very wise to think though the options rather than be agonising whether to have an abortion a few years down the line.

It has to be your decision and as someone else has already said you need to be completely sure.

On a personal level it's not something I would do because I have no idea whats gonna happen in 10, 20 years time, and what if me and OH split, and I met someone else and wanted a baby with him.

Its also not unheard of for women to think their familys completed, then 15 years later want a baby.

Have you considered a mirena coil? They are much more reliable than the pill and last 5 years?

If you are completely sure then go for it, you aren't doing anything wrong. It's your body and up to you.

 

[glitzyglamgirl]

Its absolutely your desicion and no-one elses, but as others have said you have to be so so sure its exactly the right choice for you.

Im 32 and my cylces rule my life - 3 weeks of severe PMT followed by a week of agonising cramps, its always been this way and after we have a baby I want to have it all taken away, no more babies and no more periods. But.....a part of me still wants to hold on to the possibility of having another baby further down the road.

Another option is to try a coil for 5 years - you wont have to think about it or worry about for 5 years, and then when it comes around to having it replaced or removed, you might be more sure of your choice.

I wouldnt recomend depo prevera to anyone, its evil nasty stuff

 

[kellie80]

I don't think its selfish at all hun as long as you have really thought it through and considered what would happen if any thing did go wrong in your life. Maybe you could get an IUD fitted and see if you still feel the same in a few years time. I myself have considered getting sterilized even though I know they probally wouldn't do it yet cos I'm too young. I can't honestly say though that I would never want another child, I know I definatly don't want any more at the minute and have no plans to ever have anymore but ypu never know what round the corner and how you will feel. Thats why I know it wouldn't be right for me. I think I will reconsider when I'm about 30 (in 3 years) and see how I feel then. Its such a big decision.

 

[greendayrock]

hi hun i was sterilzed on the 3rd of may, i have 2 children boy and girl. i feel my family is now complete and do not want any more kids. i have also had pnd with both so i dont wanna go through that again i am 32 and my doctor was only to happy to refer me for the op.