Hi, We have just attempted mediation which failed miserably. My ex wants to see our 18m old more than what he is seeing him now and my main concern is son's safety. Dad is negligent - no empathy, nappy rashes, fevers that he does not notice, etc. Hence I have concerns and was waiting for mediation to resolve this. His only aim was to increase the hours. Currently he sees him for 9h a week over two days. He also has a new woman 6 months after he moved out that he has already introduced to our son which I only found out at mediation. He lives with her and has taken our son there without my knowledge and refusing to give the address where he lives and takes him. I am not happy about any of this. When I requested in mediation that he sees him on his own in a warm place where they can play, he says he prefers to take him around on buses and to shops where he has friends. This is for 6h when he sees him! Is this normal? To me it seems he is not really interested in the child but in fulfilling his own needs... I was told that our next step is court. I could not get hold of my solicitor after the meeting and am worried about his imminent visit before I manage to get hold of her. Help! By the way the reason for the split was his verbal and psychological abuse in front of the child. I also caught him playing with him once when he was 2-3months old tonguing him. I have never mentioned this to anyone as I don't know what to do about it really. I am really disturbed about the whole situation and want to protect my son to the best of my ability and all I got from the mediator is well, there are more and more shared residences.
Contact with father
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Holi
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Sorry your having such a hard time!
I'm not 100% sure what you mean by tonguing him?? But if its anything sexual that you are not happy with, I would under no circumstances give your LO to him and I would go straight to the police. You cannot give your child to someone you know may be a sexual threat to you LO
Xxx
I'm not 100% sure what you mean by tonguing him?? But if its anything sexual that you are not happy with, I would under no circumstances give your LO to him and I would go straight to the police. You cannot give your child to someone you know may be a sexual threat to you LO
Xxx
CeeCee
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Totally agree with Holi, under no circumstances should a child be left alone with someone you feel may be sexually abusing your LO, but again, not sure what you mean by tonguing.
Unfortunately, as hard as it can be, your ex having a new woman, will not sway anything in court.
I'm currently going through court myself, and its such a long process.
Unfortunately, as hard as it can be, your ex having a new woman, will not sway anything in court.
I'm currently going through court myself, and its such a long process.
Hun if this is going to court then you would be the respondent parent, he has to set all that up himself if he wants to see your son.
As for what you've mentioned about your concerns that he was touching your son inappropriately, did you ever discuss it with him at the time or let him know you saw? I can understand if he was abusive to you, you might have felt unable to do anything at the time. Thin is something that I think you should involve the police with. They will ask why you are only mentioning it now and I assume he will deny it.
Once he takes it to court, which will take a few months at best, if you raise concerns about your sons safety you may be able to suggest using a contact centre.
I would strongly advise you to call childline about what you saw him do. They can advise you x
As for what you've mentioned about your concerns that he was touching your son inappropriately, did you ever discuss it with him at the time or let him know you saw? I can understand if he was abusive to you, you might have felt unable to do anything at the time. Thin is something that I think you should involve the police with. They will ask why you are only mentioning it now and I assume he will deny it.
Once he takes it to court, which will take a few months at best, if you raise concerns about your sons safety you may be able to suggest using a contact centre.
I would strongly advise you to call childline about what you saw him do. They can advise you x
