Completely Bummed Out

[MissJuly10]

Had my parents over earlier and got chatting to my mum about my cycle. She quite bluntly said she doesn't think I'm pregnant because I'm not different and have no *obvious* signs and also she said I don't have that instinct where I just know.

I know I shouldn't think too much of this but when people speak negatively over my feelings etc, it does bum me out and I start thinking they're right and I can't be. I'm not asking for people to sugar TTC over and tell me it's all rainbows and lollipops because I know it isn't but I do appreciate sensitivity.

However, having said that, I do have a slight niggling that this is different but like I've mentioned before, it might be because my cycle has gone on for so long. I told her my biggest sign is no AF!! Although I know I'm irregular so it could be that AF is due any day but then again there's no reason why a BFP isn't hiding somewhere.

I just think that from now on, I will talk about TTC only on here or to hubby - luckily only my mum and sisters are aware of us wanting a baby.

It's spurred me on to get hubby to take me off to the docs and get a blood test. I'm more prepared for a BFN and won't deny I'll be devastated if it is a BFN but at least I'd know.

Sorry for the moan, I just needed to get that off my chest.

x x

ETA - CD62 at the moment compared to last cycle's 42 days. x

 

[LouiseB]

I often find that i instantly regret asking my mums opinion on just about anything...

If you don't know whether you are pregnant or not, your mum certainly doesn't know if your pregnant or not

I hope you're not just sitting around waiting for AF to show - did you get any OPKs?

AF typically depends on when OV occurs, so if you haven't had AF it is possible that you are still waiting for OV.

I know you've been at it for what seems forever, but don't give up on thiss cycle just yet

And where did you get the lollipops?! No one ever offered me lollipops

 

[Tracey M]

Aw honey, I'm right with you. I'm not even telling my mum I'm TTC cos she'll be like "you dont have the space, you cant afford it" blah blah blah. My sister knows, my next door neighbour and my best friend and a couple of fellow travel agents (that I dont work with)...
I dont even discuss it with my DH cos he thinks babies come from a stork!

I really feel like I'm pregnant but I'm getting BFN or CBD and First Response so I think they are sooo final. They had better doing a test that says "bugger off you stupid girl, its just your body mucking you about - stop wasting your money" - but hey, they cant fit that on the stick!!

I dont know what I would do without you girls - for advise, reassurance, reality checks etc - you are all my rocks!!

 

[Tracey M]

And where did you get the lollipops?! No one ever offered me lollipops

Aw Louise !!

 

[LouiseB]

Found one

It's a bit hairy, but nevermind

 

[MissJuly10]

Louise - Have one of mine, I have plenty from when I first joined.

No but we're going to Asda tonight to grab a few bits for the weekend so hubby mentioned having a look at the OPKs, he doesn't want to go for the cheapies.
I feel like I've already OVed, I've had stretchy ewcm and then went dry for a period of time and then started getting creamy CM again. I also had 3-4 days of what may well have been IB and nothing since then except the CM. I've mentioned the other possible symptoms in my TTC Journal but I don't think much of them because I know I won't "believe" it til I have proof lol.

I won't give up but I just get nothing but negative comments and it makes me feel like I've failed already. Gah, I sound so selfish, I know there's people out there who've been trying for much longer and I have complete and utter respect and admiration for them, there's no way I could do this every 40/50/60/70 days, it'd drive me mad!

Tracey - I know, I don't know where I'd be without the forums, it's a huge support and I love it here, everyone's great.

I know what you mean, I have that niggly feeling but I reckon it's purely wishful thinking. I dislike CBDs because of their bluntness haha! In fact I hate tests full stop. x x

 

[maybe baby]

Aww Miss J,

Although your Mum's been a bit annoying she might just be trying to prepare you for the worst you know, not get your hopes up and things.

Really Hun, get to the docs, worst that will happen is a BFN and you'll get your long cycles sorted out and the best will be a BFP, if you don't go tomorrow you'll have to wonder all weekend.

Give them a call, you'll be fine!

xx

 

[kizzibea]

Hun, I think this is a huge part of the reason why I haven't told anyone we're trying. People don't always come out with the most helpful comments.

Really hope this is it for you.

 

[MissJuly10]

Maybe - I've got my car going now so will prob tell my hubby I'm going to book myself in tomorrow and just do it cos I'm so impatient now hehe! I could understand her not wanting me to be hopeful but I'd already said to her I'm not flitting about thinking I'm defo pregnant, in fact I'm thinking of the worst case scenario just so I don't get carried away with the fact I'm CD62 etc etc. She just kept on about it and in the end I just stopped her and said we should change the subject. x x

Kizzibea - Thanks hun. x x

 

[maybe baby]

Oh good, you're doing the right thing Hun, and you're not at all impatient, 62 days is a long long time.

Good Luck, keep me posted!

xx

 

[xshauna_bazx]

Hunni i thought i was out the month i got my BFP because i had no signs and never had IB or anything. You dont need to have signs everyone is different xxx

 

[MissJuly10]

Maybe - Thanks hun, trying to keep occupied. Keep expecting to get hit with AF cramps but nothing at all. So far so good! x x

Shauna - I think my niggly feeling is because of my long cycle cos I'm still expecting AF. I'm just eager to get down to the doctors and put myself out of my misery. x x

 

[SunnyGirl]

Oh dear re what your mum said - sounds like it came from a good place but totally off the mark in terms of helping. Hope you're ok - she might even say sorry soon. My mum does when she realises she's done a silly aw!

Definitely get to the quacks - this shy bfp needs pushing onstage OR your long cycles need some buttkicking. Chin up hun xxxx

 

[linxminx21]

aww hun i agree docs is a deff ..... you need to know and i know ya scared of needles but they wil either give you a BFP or some help with your cycles like the girls have said,
........... i need to know too lol im patiently popping in and out watching and waiting

 

[Piglet's Mama]

Hi sweetie,

Sorry you're feeling blue Sometimes Mums can be very insensitive, I don't think they mean it, but more like Maybe said, they say these things to prepare us. I rang my Mum last night squealing that I was ovulating (I don't think I could have been anymore excited if I was preggo!) and I just talked to her now and she said she was trying to work out dates for me to conceive; bless.

I was very quick to write the OPK's off - cheapies & digi's. If it wasn't for Maybe I would have thrown them out the window but THEY DO WORK! I know from having a 58 day cycle and two 50-day cycles previous to that, that I couldn't go through with guessing each time. That's why Agnus Castus and the OPK's were on the top of my list; even if I don't get BFP this time round, my cycles will be around 46 days (12 less than last time) and I now know when to start testing for OV. Last night, once I got that positive OPK, it all became so real and like "Wow - we could really make a baby now", before it was complete guess work.

Also, the EWCM theory, I'm not sure if that's accurate for everyone. I had it twice, tested and got negative OPK - Tracey had the same. I do think you will struggle to move forward with TTC if you only rely on CM to determine your OV.

Please please please (for your sanity & ours) get yourself in for a blood test. If it's BFN, you've got us to whinge and moan at, and plus, it is only Cycle 2. Get yourself some OPK's and try again.

xxx

 

[Olive]

Hope you're ok miss july. Must be very frustrating having such a long cycle. Hope you have some luck with the OPKs. And very much hope your BFP is just hiding xxxxx

 

[MissJuly10]

Thanks everyone. Will try and reply all in one go lol!

R.E. The doctor - My husband told me last night that he thinks we should go to the doctors, but try and wait a little bit more, especially as my cycles are so up and down - I could just be on a normal cycle but then I could be pregnant - who knows?

I just felt that my mum was drumming it into my head that I can't be pregnant just because I haven't said to her "I feel pregnant", I thought it was a lousy thing to say, besides, I *have* had that feeling but I don't say anything because I think it's because my cycle is so long! CD63 today!

We haven't written off going to the doctor, or using OPKs, we discuss it a lot and I think that we will be doing something about it soon.

I did say to my hubby that going to the doc's would at least tell us if it's normal or not and he agrees so I don't think it will be long til we go, I think it might be Friday as hubby is off work.

Thanks girls for the replies, I really do appreciate it. You're all so lovely.

x x