Competition

[Bee7]

Does anyone else feel like pregnancy and motherhood can feel like a bit of a competition at times? Obviously everyone always thinks their baby is the lovliest, cutest, most intelligent etc (that's just normal!) but sometimes it feels like to some people everything is a competition to be/have the best.

I live in a small village and there's quite a few other girls due at the same time as me. My mum's actually friends with the MIL of one of the other girls and she's constantly asking what brand bottles or pram etc we're getting then making snide remarks about her daughter-in-law's being more expensive! I've even heard people talking about who has the best, neatest bump! And don't get me started on childbirth...apparently women who have c-sections or epidurals 'arent doing it properly'. Since when did motherhood become so competitive? Makes me worry for the poor kids as they grow up! xxx

 

[Verity2011]

Awwwww hon! I definitely know what you mean and the ladies on here have heard me complain about the same thing with family! As you said it's tough when everyone turns everything into a competition even the weight of the baby! It's just important to remember that the most important thing is that the LO is nice, safe and healthy, if other people's concerns are the price of their stuff etc. then their priorities are a bit ski-whiff!

The women on here always make me feel better about this as they are all so kind and supportive so I come on here and rant LOL

 

[VikkiR]

Why can't we women be kind to each other xx

 

[poppypd]

Totally agree! It's ridiculous - a baby is not a material item! Surely 'love' is the most important factor! I feel the same about weddings - people are so judgemental about things at weddings!!!! It really bugs me and I would want a small one if I got married. There are so many tv programmes now where people are judged, people are encouraged to be mean about others!! Come dine with me, who has best house, and countless others - let alone the talent shows!

 

[Bee7]

Don't get me wrong, i think some healthy competition in life is good and i know OH is intent on instilling a competitive streak in our little boy where sports and stuff are concerned. But it bugs me when people get so competitive and materialistic about the important things in life...like pregnancy, children, weddings etc. Surely we should all be supporting each other rather competing against each other?! Luckily the ladies here aren't like that at all...phew!

P.s. Poppypd, i was watching 'May The Best House Win' on Saturday morning thinking 'dear god what has the world come to!' xxx

 

[BellaRiven]

I completely get what you mean , my mum was complaining the other day about the amount of money I have spent so far on baby stuff and how her and my sister never ever spent that much, I didn;t mention that I actually work to get that money!!!, and it's not that I want the best stuff or the most expensive I buy what I like, I currently earn the money to do it, when I don't have the money I won't buy it!!, My best friend who is due 4 weeks before me has a massive competitive streak in her and she keeps asking me what I have bought and it's annoying.

My deeply irritating sister coined it with me the other day, I was picking my nephew up from her house and he said aunty Kelly you don;t care what you look like do you and my sister promptly replied with Aunty kelly wears what she wants when she wants and she buys what she likes regardless of other peoples comments and do you know what that's true and I will never change .....ever.

I don;t think there should be that much competition it's like what has been said we should be supportinge ach other not competing against each other

Sorry for the rant!!!!!!!!

 

[pixie17]

i think its so stupid. i dont think there is anything wrong with buying nice things if thats what you want to doa nd do not ram it down other peoples throat. but i would never judge someone on what they have/didnt have. the most important thing is that we care for our babies well (however, no doubt that will also provoke some 'she does that' 'she did this' rubbish) grrr. it really bugs me.

 

[winnie89]

i hate it when women comment on how you do things, i was talking to my mother in law the other day and i said about using wipes on harry from when he's born and she told me off! i'm like he;s my son and i'll raise him how i want to, i think we all try and give our children the best start in life and why should anyone be criticised for giving their child what they want! a girl who works with me she got married 2 weeks before i did and apparently because she had a huge wedding and i had a relatively small one hers was better than mine! but each to their own i loved my little wedding and i had a fantastic day no matter what anyone thinks! i was reading an article in a magazine the other day about how we all judge each other on how we do things especially when it concerns kids, but i know i don't do it , me and my sil do things completely differently and have made completely different choices (i.e she chose to bottle feed and i'm going to bf) doesn't mean we are doing wrong by our children we just have a different way of bringing our children up xxx