Can anyone relate?

[lauralou]

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[netty]

i am so sorry they have you in limbo hun, not sure why they add 2 weeks on but someone on here will know. Didnt wanna read and run sweety i hope it all works out for you, they shouldnt make you wait like that from what you have described it does sound like MC BUT theres no guarantee so try and stay calm, plenty of ladies have a bleed and carry on fine.

I really hope it all works out for you sweety, i lost mine at 14 weeks so was in agony sorry i cant relate more

 

[TORino]

I have had the dreaded wait between scans in this scenario as well hun. I know all too well the rush of emotions you will be having. I swung between being positive and then assuming the worst. It is torturous.

I went as I had some brown discharge and I was meant to be 8 weeks pregnant. I was told the heart wasn't beating properly and that I had to wait 2 weeks to see if it could fix itself or otherwise. I got the feeling they weren't telling me everything at first so I pushed them on it. I said how likely is it to be good news at the next scan and the sonographer said it wasn't very likely. I started the grieving process after the first scan really, then I would get cross at myself for giving up on my baby as the sonographer did say that she has witnessed 'miracles'. When I went back they told me it hadn't grown and the pregnancy wasn't viable. I had no bleeding etc and would have otherwise found this out at the 12 week scan probably. I asked how big the baby was and she told me it has grown to a gestational age of 6 weeks so we had obviously caught it in it's demise at the last scan.

If you got your BFP on the 26th october, assuming regular cycles and on that day you were roughly 4 weeks pregnant then you should be about 8 weeks pregnant now. The fact that you are only measuring 5-6 weeks is not a good sign hun . Especially with your bleeding etc. Sorry I know this is not what you want to hear

I hope you get good news at your next scan and you have a good support network around you for the next 10 days as it will be a real emotional rollercoaster for you. x

 

[BabyBrain]

My understanding of it is they add on 2 weeks as it's roughly the date of the end of your last period, as many women ovulate at different times of the month its seen as a safe average (but then I could be wrong). They then use the 12 week scan to date the baby accurately which is why many women are either put back or forward at that point.

Thinking of you hun xxxxxxxx

 

[dyscochick]

babybrain is right. For some reason in this country they work on post-menstruation dates so it adds another 2 weeks on to your dates i.e. the date of your last period (other countries don't always so it makes it even more confusing!). You could be earlier than you thought, have they booked you in for another scan in a week or so to see? Sadly its a really inaccurate process this early in pregnancy and often seem to keep people bouncing back forward until they can be 100% sure that the baby isn't viable, i.e. they they see no growth between scans and no heartbeat when there should be one, depending on the size of the foetus. Its an awful time for you hun, I was further on so didn't have to go through that but my heart aches for you cos its so emotional. Sadly you will have to wait 10 days to find out either way for sure, the scan just isn;t sensitive enough for them to be really sure what is going on.

I hope they gave you advice if you do start to bleed more heavily, painkillers if you need them and pads, not tampons.

 

[CARNAT22]

Laura sweetie, I am not sure this is what you want to hear either but I'll be honest with you.

I had my BFP on 25th and would have been 8 weeks + now so even if you did conceive late or have really long cycles the fact that you are only showing as 5-6 weeks and bleeding fresh blood is not good I am afraid.

I had almost the exact same thing happen to me in May and I was left to wait 3 weeks before I had my resolution (which was sadly my first M/c)

All the EPU could do was wait and see if the pregnancy progressed - it did slightly progress between my scans at 5w 6d and 6w 6d but when I was scanned at 8w all the could see was what they had seen at 6w 6d.

I then miscarried naturally.

So yes I can unfortunatley totally relate to what you are going through.

It was very isolating to have to walk around for 21 days effectively 'waiting' to lose my baby and when I think back I wonder how I actually coped (I was still at work through-out as apart from light bleeding I had no pain!)

When M/c did occur it was over a long weekend and that was when I bled heavily and had pretty horrible cramps. A scan 3 days later confirmed complete M/c.

I have since gone on to have two more losses but that first loss was grim, the waiting was much worse than anthing else! Also the fact that there was the most minute possibility I could remain pregnant played mind games with me. I was literally in limbo...

It is no comfort now sweetie as you are there, going through this. I promise that you will come out the other side though and you will be OK.

You just need to be brave and strong.

On a practical note I would say make sure you eat and drink to keep your physical strength up. Try to keep busy (I mean mentally so read / watch DVD's - try to not too ponder too much)

Of course there is always a chance sweetie that you have your dates wrong but I think you need to be preapred for the worst just in-case!

I am sorry this has happened to you.

xxxxxxxxxxx

 

[kred84]

Sorry to hear what you are going through hun.

Have you had bloods done?

I had to have them 2 days apart to see how the hcg levels are. Apparantly that can give a better indication as to whats happening and, hopefully you won't have to wait so long for your scan.

Sorry i can't be much more help hun



xxx

 

[CARNAT22]

Sorry to hear what you are going through hun.

Have you had bloods done?

I had to have them 2 days apart to see how the hcg levels are. Apparantly that can give a better indication as to whats happening and, hopefully you won't have to wait so long for your scan.

Sorry i can't be much more help hun



xxx

I am surprised they didn't take bloods either?

Although saying that with my 1st M/c (which sounds very similar to what poor Laura is going through) they didn't give me any blood tests either.

 

[kred84]

That was their first port of call as i was too early to show up in the scan.

They can tell so much just from the bloods, i would have thaough they'd do that so as not to keep you waiting.

It's pretty horrendus sometimes as they don't really acknowledge it properly beacuse it's before 12 weeks. I kinda felt that they don't really care, when i was going through this they just said well it's really early so just expect a period sometime soon!

Not really what you wanna hear at such a hard time.

Hope you get some answers soon, limbo sucks.

xxx

 

[CARNAT22]

That was their first port of call as i was too early to show up in the scan.

They can tell so much just from the bloods, i would have thaough they'd do that so as not to keep you waiting.

It's pretty horrendus sometimes as they don't really acknowledge it properly beacuse it's before 12 weeks. I kinda felt that they don't really care, when i was going through this they just said well it's really early so just expect a period sometime soon!

Not really what you wanna hear at such a hard time.

Hope you get some answers soon, limbo sucks.

xxx

Yep, my last M/C was too early to show on scan so they confiremd it with blood tests!

Limbo does indeed suck. At the time it is all about getting through one day at a time.

Laura swettie, I hope you are doing OK (well as OK as can be expected!)

xxxxx

 

[lauralou]

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[laurat]

Sorry you are in this position! Xxxxxx

 

[CARNAT22]

Thanks carnat, your words help a lot. I really am in such a weird state of mind at the moment, one minute I'm ok and thinking how my dates could be out and that the gestational age is all that counts and so far it's not got a heartbeat purely because it's too early yet.

But then I just go so downhill, I can almost feel my heart sink as I remember what is happening. It's all so weird trying to get on with everyday things, I think havin my little boy around me helps as he's 3 and just so active and playful so I just spend my time with him, but I look at him and think "I'm losing one of these" and it just breaks my heart.
I'm still bleeding,but still no cramps. Just can't relax because I just don't know what to expect.

Oh and the mw said there was no point in a blood test as they aren't very reliable?? So today I rang the doctor to request one and they said there was no point and that of they thought it would help they'd do it.

You're really helping me tho ladies I really appreciate you sharing your experiences with me, I can imagine its hard to talk about it over and over xxxxx

I know exaclty how you feel about having that hope - until it is an actual M/c [or not?] that hope is what keeps you going

I had to go back to the EPU weekly and was always told "well it has progressed but it still doesn't look right, but anything could happen" - I mean what the Hell did that mean?

I get the feeling that they didn't know what was going on (I was scanned twice on each occasion - once by "normal Dr" and every time they had to call the consultant in as my case wasn't typical )

They were always pretty honest in that I should expect the worse but would caveat that with "but you never know, it could turn out OK". It was complete and utter mind fcuk. Add to that the fact I waited 21 days for a resolution! It was ahorrible, sad, dark time!

I think you have to take comfort anything you can and I am glad that your lovely little lad is helping take your mind of things

It will pass and you will begin to feel better, it never truely goes away though!

xxxxxxxx

 

[dyscochick]

I'm so sorry Laura, its such an awful time for you. The whole pregnancy process is a roller coaster of emotions and hormones and this adds on to that and makes the ride an awful one with even downs. I know when I went through it in slightly different circumstances to you about 4 months ago now (how time flies) the early days were the hardest and especially as you know nothing for certain yet i'm sure that are the worst for you. Thinking of you xxxx

 

[lauralou]

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[dyscochick]

So sorry honey