Any tips for keeping calm??

[Becs]

Hey there,

This is my second visit to 1st tri as have had a m/c and a couple of chemical pregnancies. I know that everyone in this section finds it just terrifying and wondered if anyone has developed techniques for dealing with the self inflicted stress of being in first tri. I'm already checking every time I go to the loo my cervix position and to see if I am spotting. I'm going to be a ball of nerves if I don't get this in hand. Alternatively if you can't offer some words of wisdom why not post your own paranoid activety? If we can't find a way around it we may as well laugh at ourselves

 

[missjennipenni]

Im very paranoid just now too, but dont want to make you worse! lol

Ive been through a suspected ectopic, a general anesthetic, blood thinning drugs, morphine, a lost mirena coil, anti-sickness injections and a lapaorscopy, all while pregnant. Im petrified this has somehow affected my little bean

 

[Becs]

 

[sunnyday]

I was a complete wreck for the first few weeks, I'd had a chemical pregnancy in May and was convinced that this one wasn't going to stick. I used to rush to the loo every half hour and check for blood and spent ages trawling the internet for pregnancy risks and facts.

I did countless pregnancy tests, right up to week 7, then I got a grip and decided to stop. Booked in for a private scan at 8 weeks, saw the heartbeat and then finally managed to chill out.

Had my 12 week scan today and everything is fine. Again, I was a little concerned leading up to it as all my symptoms had disappeared and I felt completely normal. Just kept telling myself that this time would be different.

The thing that made the most difference for me was the private scan at 8 weeks. If you can afford it, book one up right away. Also, confide in a friend who's already had a baby and is happy to answer all your questions and concerns. I also told my mum early on which I found to be a real help. Plus, this forum is brilliant (as you already know), there's always someone about to offer support and advice.

 

[missjennipenni]

Ive had no bleeding though (apart from some very very light spots after the op) so im feeling much better about it now.

Ive never had a m/c before, so i have no idea really what you are going through. I know it must be far tougher xx

 

[jenna]

Could you get something to keep yourself busy? My sister bought me a scrapbooking set to keep my mind off it.

 

[happy-chick]

When I first fell preg I was terrified after my m/c and worried so much, I kinda had to give myself a shaking a decide that I was going to try to enjoy every day that everything is ok and not think about the 'what ifs' as there is no point worrying about something that may never happen.

I tried to keep busy with stuff and kinda ignore the fact that i was pregnant in a way so that I wasnt worrying so much, of course I worried there was no way that I wouldnt worry but I kinda got it into control by telling myself that right at this moment in time I'm still pregnant and everything is fine and therefore I had no reason to worry....

Hope that helps a little x

 

[lisa&alex]

well worrying isnt going to help things..stop checking your cervix, the only thing that going to help is bacteria to get up there..the 1st 12 weeks are nerve racking.. just try to enjoy it and dont fret.

if anything bad was to happen theres nothing you can do about it.. so try to stop stressing yourself out x

 

[Squiglet]

Im very paranoid just now too, but dont want to make you worse! lol

Ive been through a suspected ectopic, a general anesthetic, blood thinning drugs, morphine, a lost mirena coil, anti-sickness injections and a lapaorscopy, all while pregnant. Im petrified this has somehow affected my little bean

Holy Cwap!

I just had to keep peeing on sticks... and everytime I felt wet down there I panicked to see if I was bleeding again... I was lucky though as I had these hormone pessaries and you get to stick em up your lady bits and check to see if your bleeding at the same time ( ) with clean hands of course. But I bled a lot so it was always niggling in the back of my mind.

Oh yes...then the midwife and GP telling me all my meds would harm my unborn child and I had visions of it coming out with three legs and a tail... That had me going for a long while...

Then there was the injury to my back and for a long time I thought I was in labour because that is exactly how my labour with my daughter happened....

Funnily enough, I am much calmer this time round...

 

[Babylicious]

Like squig I just did pregnancy tests everyday

 

[Happybunny]

Hiya honey! Congratulations!!!

It is completely normal to worry, I think everyone in first tri is a little anxious, whether they've had an m/c or not. It is an uncertain time coupled with the tiredness and hormones racing around your body.

As others have said, it is best to try and keep busy, almost ignore that you are pregnant. I have found the three weeks I have been at work have gone much faster than the three when I was on holiday.

Try and take time to yourself. I know it sound hippy-ish, but it is good to play some really calming music and concentrate on breathing. It really helps to relax you. You could use this time to visualize your baby growing inside of you and imagine it having a warm, protective glow around it. (I know it sounds a mad, but my therapist taught me how to do it and it helps lots!!)

Best of all, come and chat to the peeps on the forum when things are getting you down. Everyone is always so supportive and positive. I always feel better sharing my worries here.

Good luck to you sweetie,

 

[Becs]

well worrying isnt going to help things..stop checking your cervix, the only thing that going to help is bacteria to get up there..the 1st 12 weeks are nerve racking.. just try to enjoy it and dont fret.

if anything bad was to happen theres nothing you can do about it.. so try to stop stressing yourself out x

Well I do wash my hands first, I'm probably one of the few who wash before and after

Happy chick - good one, that's my new mantra, 'I am pregnant right now and nothings wrong'

 

[fothers]

stop checking your cervix and stop taking your temp. This is a new pregnancy and a new start- things should be fine.

Can you get a 7w scan to see the heartbeat? I would try and push for that from your GP after the last miscarriage- it will make you feel much better and will break up the long drag til 12w

 

[Ginnymarie]

hi pet

I have been a nervous wreck this pregnancy and to be honest the anxiety was ruining it until i saw the bub on 8 wk scan and it had grown and it was a bit of reassurance...
as happy bunny says all the calming stuff and talking to the baby sending good vibes might help
take care...its easier said than done i know
x

 

[happy-chick]

Happy chick - good one, that's my new mantra, 'I am pregnant right now and nothings wrong'

Thats the spirit hun, im sure you'll be just fine

 

[Becs]

I'm glad I started this thread you have all got fantastic advice. Happy Bunny, I love the idea of calming music, relaxation and picturing a warm glow around my baby. I'm going to do that after each bath. Big thumbs up to all of you and Best wishes and good vibes for all your little beans.
Becs xxxx

 

[muppetmummy]

 

[Becs]

P.S - No more checking my cervix and feeling better already

 

[muppetmummy]

i worried myself silly in the first couple weeks checking my cervix. I was convinced af was gonna arrive cos it was so low.
I also carried on temping for the first week. It does help you to relax when you stop all that

 

[gemmap27]

I was very worried too, but I decided that I was going to enjoy being pregnant - if something bad is going to happen there isnt anything that can be done to stop it. Just make sure you listen to your body - take plenty of rest when you need it - sleep when you need it and just generally look after yourself! Before you know it youll be at your scan and off to 2nd tri!!

congratulations and try not to worry (easier said than done I know!!)