Angry

[netty]

.

 

[KarolinaMoon]

Hi Lynette,

So sorry to hear you are feeling down, it is a horrible horrible, quite lonely experience. I am still waiting to M/C, so I don't really know how I am going to feel after it all, but I do know that this is one of the toughest expeirences of my life.
If you don't feel comofrtable with counselling/antidepressants, then don't feel pressured into going down that route. They help for some people, but for others they simply don't. Only you know what will help and what won't
I think sometimes having a good 'let go', having a drink if thats what you like, helps get things out of your system. This wkend, me and my husband had a bottle of wine, maybe not the best idea since I am expecting to M/C any day, but it helped us relax.
With time, things WILL get better. I know this for definite, I had a termination 10 years ago and for months after I felt like I had a big heavy wait over me, but it will lift I can assure you Positive thinking is very powerful, do something that makes you feel good, something you enjoy
Be kind to yourself hun xxxx

 

[netty]

thanks hunny, so sorry you are waiting to mc i had to wait a week after my 12 weeks scan for baby to come and its the worst time ever. i think all it is is that i have told myse;f i am ok after going back to work and it has just all come to a head, i just got to accept i still need time i guess

 

[Dragonfly Fi]

hey sweetie xx hope your feeling a bit better after writing that xx

how are you on your TTC journey? are you waiting for the witch or just getting on with it? Maybe when your actively TTC you will feel a bit better? I know that it is giving me a bit of a crutch, knowing that one day soon i will be preggers again

I think that your hubby is probably trying to think of anything he can do to make things right again for you, its sad for men when they cannot help us You need to make it really clear to him (like i have with mine) that the only thing that will make me feel even slightly right again, is to get pregnant and have another baby.

i'm so sorry you feel like you can't have any answers to your m/c that must be so hard xx

Try and think about what you would like to achieve this month? just a few things, and then narrow it down and think about what you would like to achieve this week, or this day.. and just try and work at making things a bit nicer for yourself inspite of your grief. Obviously what we really want is to make another baby but be proactive about that if you can. I understand you might be waiting for the witch but maybe buy some ovulation tests or something so that you have done something towards that goal

much love

you know where we are xx

 

[Jaxx01]

Hey hunni...

I just wanted to say to you that feeling angry is a natural part of the grieving process. If you wanna feel angry, then feel angry... Ive had two MCs and until Id got all my anger out I couldnt move on!! I was horrible, angry at everyone, angry at my sister who fell pregnant 6 weeks after I lost my baby...I couldnt face even talking to her

But it does get easier and like bigbump said, as soon as you start TTC again you may feel like theres light at the end of the tunnel ..

Big hugs hun xxxx

 

[netty]

ahhhh BB your right, i think it is more that OH seems like ''oh well.....anyway time to move on'' i dont think he can ever feel the ache i have inside of me.

I am waiting for the stupid witch to come thought i had cramps last week but nothing its been a month now since my angel went away and i want my life and body back.

Do I sound awful when i say sometimes i am angry at the baby for taking my body and life and turning it upside down. sorry if that sounds sick

i need a tattoo or something, BB u still doing the suicide girl thingy? i wish i had some of my stuff to show you......i am thinking of going from blonde to dark again, maybe a choccy brown or a red

 

[CARNAT22]

Lynette,

I don't often get angry but when I do I find it creeps up on my suddenly (and is normally triggered by a little too much wine!) Also it's my OH that bears the brunt

I hate to be so bitter and look back so much. I try to spend every moment I feel like crap thinking of the things I do have, instead of what was lost. It's not easy though!

I hate that two friends will give birth to healthy babies at the time I should have given birth. I hate that they are picking out names and showing off bumps yet I have had two failed pregnancies...

However I know that I cannot change things - if I could I would but I know I have to deal with my life now, and not keep thinking about life as it could have been.

We're TTC - we discussed it a lot and for us this is the best way forward. We are not trying to replace anything - we just want our baby.

When I do fall pregnant (God willing) I will be terrified beyond words but I refuse to bring any bad feelings into any future pregnancies.

Everyday I try and try and keep trying to be positive. I don't always manage it but the more I try the more I actualy feel positive.

xxxxx

 

[netty]

yeah OH is taking the brunt of all this and i know it isnt fair. I just have to try keep positive

 

[Dragonfly Fi]

My OH is the same... he just seems non plussed by the whole thing and that really hurts me. I did have a go at him about it on Saturday and the poor guy looked so forlorn and like he couldnt do anything right, i felt awful. I have to be nicer to him, he is lovely really (for all his pain in the arse-ness)

 

[dyscochick]

Hi Lynette, i think a good day/night was required we all need to let go in our own way sometimes! and so long as you've listened and considered the options of antidepreassants and counselling and you have rejected them on what seem to absolutely solid grounds then as Karolina said don't be pushed down that route! You know your mind and body. If you need to off load on here then do. I don't think Ohs will ever fully understand an mc, and particularly early stage ones where they have not even seen a lovely live scan to appreciate the life growing inside. It doesn't mean he down care though and his aspergers on top probably doesn't help him empathise or show it. I'm sure that not great comfort to you, but big hugs hun, and remember anger is ok, and normal, and a release is better than holding it in xxx

 

[netty]

thanks lovely ladies i love you all.

feel better now i have been out and done food shop, i thnk its just when i alone i fal apart lol