Anger

[caseysmummy11]

I'm finding myself very angry all the time. Nothing in particular is getting to me just everything. I don't know whats wrong but I don't like the person I'm becoming, I just can't shake the anger but I'm trying not to let it out and cause upset when I know it may just be the grief that's making me so angry and don't want to ruin relationships I have with people over silly things.. I feel stuck between a rock and a hard place . I just want to feel normal again. Xxx

 

[Sparklisam]

I'm not an expert but within the grief cycle there is an anger element to it. Take the positives of this that you are moving through the grief cycle and that one day you will moved through the cycle. I don't mean you will have got over it as I'm am sure it is something you can never truly get over at all you just learn to cope with it all a bit better. My heart goes out to you and I wouldn't even try to understand how you are feeling. Try and focus on the positives of life and know that it's normal to have up and down days xxxx

 

[Emapot1]

Very normal at this stage. Can I suggest, i found having a weekend break away from normality and just resting your thoughts for a few days. I went to Eastbourne to the sea to breathe...and it helped. Didn't know what to do or say but just being there at that moment of time, taking some sea air in, just helped me to keep peace at ones of anger. I went on a couple of over night breaks with my 3 year old and Adam (husband) and believe it or not, even though given the circumstances, I managed to smile a couple of times. It may not be for you but I'm quite an emotional person, very hot headed and a bit lost, and found it made a small difference. To be honest that's all you need at the moment - small differences not big ones xx

 

[Emapot1]

We went relatively soon after x

 

[caseysmummy11]

Thank you both. I keep telling myself to just let it go as in the whole its so insignificant. Funnily enough empot after it first happened my first thought was I want to get away to the beach somewhere to try to forget for a little while where there's no reminders. I might try to do it. I don't want to be angry anymore, I feel sorry for my boy for being so snappy to him. The past 2 days I've made a concious effort to spend some time one on one with him and that's helped me a lot. He's definitely my light in the dark at times xxx

 

[derekbrian]

You should not worry about the matter. Only thing is that keep yourself busy and divert your self from negative thoughts. Then see the changes in you.

 

[jameshenry]

It is not only with you at this stage, it is normal because of hormone changes in the body. To over come this stage, best mode for you is to sit with your family members and devote as much as time you can with them. Watch entertainment programs on TV and go for morning walk daily, to feel fresh.

 

[kaz1983]

My boss caught most of my anger and she just stood there and took it ny anger was aimed at her because i partly blamed work for causing unnecessary stress and she jnows that she done wrong by not dealing with issues i raised she told me to let it out at her she could take it then i also took it out on a close friend as after the mc i fell in the house an he told me i had to b careful i said why the damage was already done people who realli care will know ur not meaning to b angry at them as it is all part of the grief process

We went to blackpool for a couple days an it realli cleared out heads

Take care xx

 

[caseysmummy11]

I'm not that angry anymore. I think it's just a part of the grieving process, it was misdirected anger I just wanted my baby back and I was angry that there was nothing I could do and I was angry that I was never going to see her again. There were other issues with my daughters grave that I won't go into detail with but they have since been resolved since talking about it. I bottled a lot of my feelings up during the first few months after my daughter passed away which did me no good. Ive since let it out a bit and I have been writing to her in my pregnancy scrap book I started when I was pregnant. I find it helpful as I feel like it's an outlet for me to express how I'm really feeling knowing no one will read it. It's been almost 6 months since I lost her, I still miss her very much. We didn't get to go away as my partner had to return to work but we've spent alot of time together as a family. The anger does go but the pain remains which I'm sure it always will xxx

 

[derekbrian]

This is not special with you. At this stage behavior change is normal. Keep your self engaged in jovial activities and spend much time with your family members. It will certainly brings change in your behavior.

 

[jameshenry]

It is right on your part having loss of life in a family matters a lot. But what can we do before almighty. Try to adjust yourself and try to devote your time with family and friends. It will certainly provide you positive energy.

 

[Sammy43]

I think it is totally normal to feel how you feel as I have felt the same feelings after my grief of missed miscarriage. I think first we feel devastated and cry a lot, then we go through the bit where you feel ok some days then something small will trigger your tears and remind you what could have been, and the whole world seems to be rubbing it in our faces that we aren't pregnant anymore. Then we will go through the anger stage as we think 'why?' and we have many unanswered questions and I think sometimes we blame ourselves when we all know we shouldn't as it wasn't our fault it was natures choice, which is why I think sometimes we become angry. I also find with me I tend to become angry when I see pregnant women not doing everything they can to look after their unborn baby, like eating things they shouldn't or smoking, when I know I did everything I could. It's ok to be angry it just part of the grieving process that we feel. I don't know if this has made sense but maybe this is why you feel the way you do. It's completely natural xxx