Second miscarriage

Discussion in 'Coping with Miscarriage & Loss' started by JoD, Feb 7, 2012.

  1. JoD

    JoD Well-Known Member

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    What is up with me!! I'm so angry and frustrated, feel like a failure as I don't seem to be able to provide myself and husband with the family we desperately want.

    1st was 10 weeks to the day back in november, this time I've only got to 5 plus 6 days... will they even count this as a miscarriage as under 6 weeks?

    I'm waiting for EPU to phone me this morning, I know I wont get answers and will just be told 'how often it happens'.

    Are there any supplements I can take myself to help with next pregnancy?
     
  2. netty

    netty Well-Known Member

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    so sorry hun :hugs: and YES it does still count sweets dont let em fob u off
    hope ur ok sweets, again i am really sorry ur going thru this xx
     
  3. CARNAT22

    CARNAT22 Well-Known Member

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    Oh darling, I am so very sorry to hear this!

    One is awful but mulitple is just cruel.

    Please take some time to rest and try to recover - a loss is a loss at any stage and yes 5w 6d will be counted as an actual miscarriage.

    When you feel a little stronger you need to book an appointment with your GP and see if they can refer you to a recurrent miscarriage clinic.

    Please be aware that some catchment areas have a strict '3 miscarriage policy' and you may not get referred BUT it is worth asking and stressing how upsetting you are finding this....

    Your age may be a factor I think if you are over a certain age, you can be referred after 2 losses.

    As I say it is dependant on your NHS trust.

    I am currently awaiting my results after having 3 m/c's in the space of 7 months...

    Sweetie - you are not to blame - miscarriages are our bodies way of saying this baby was not going to grow and be healthy? As harsh as that sounds a m/c really is our body doing it's job.

    I know how upsetting it is to go through a miscarriage though - I have been there and felt heartbroken too many times for my liking :shock:

    Keep strong and healthy and I hope you get some answers soon

    xxxxxxxxxxx
     
    #3 CARNAT22, Feb 7, 2012
    Last edited: Feb 7, 2012
  4. JoD

    JoD Well-Known Member

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    Thanks ladies, I'm 31 in april... wish we started trying a few years ago but just presumed when we were ready I'd come off the pill and have a baby... how wrong was I!!

    Going to give it another go and if the same happens again I think I'll have a coil fitted for 6 months.

    It's a strict 3 miscarriage policy here as I asked my Dr last time, but I'm still going to go back and see him again.

    Thanks for the kind words and support x x
     
  5. CARNAT22

    CARNAT22 Well-Known Member

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    Oh darling, I'm 32 in June and wished we'd started TTC earlier as well.... I did fall pregnnat very easily after coming off the pill yet went on to have 3 m/c's.

    Life is so cruel sometimes?

    Def go to the Dr and see if he can be persuaded to refer you earlier? Although I know that the 3 M/c policy is usually set out by the recurrent m/c clinics and not our GP's... It just goes to show that multiple miscarriages are quite common.

    So sorry that you are having to go through this!

    xxxxxxxxxxx
     
  6. beanster

    beanster Well-Known Member

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    So sorry you are going through this for the second time. It is really hard but try and stay strong. It is not your fault and there is nothing you can do to stop this awful thing happening. I had 3 mc's and had tests done, OH had his chromosones tested too to see if we were mismatched. Very disheartening when they can't give you any reasons. We nearly gave up but then a miracle happened and we had a sticky bean so it can happen. Thinking of you :hugs::hugs::hugs:
     
  7. CARNAT22

    CARNAT22 Well-Known Member

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    Glad to hear it all worked out for you!!!
    Out of interest did your tests find anything?

    We've had all of our blood tests etc and now just waiting for the results - have been told that there is only a 30% chance these tests will even indicate a reason :shock: :shock:

    xxxxxxxxx
     
  8. beanster

    beanster Well-Known Member

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    Nothing came up on any of the tests to indicate why it kept happening to us. Got a lot of statistics too about how often it happens etc, not really that much comfort though is it. First mc was a blighted ovum but don't know about the other two
     
  9. CARNAT22

    CARNAT22 Well-Known Member

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    Well as I say glad it all worked out!

    Hoping for sticky beans all round :)

    xxxxxxxxx
     
  10. Sunbeam638

    Sunbeam638 Well-Known Member

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    Awww I'm so sorry you have had another mc :hugs:

    I've had 2 in the past and one was about 6 weeks, it does count & please don't feel like a failure xxx you're not!

    It's sad that they expect you to have 3 mc before they investigate it :(

    I take pregnecare. I did take agnus castus, EPO till ovulation then baby aspirin from Ov to cycle due date. Some docs recommend it for preventing further mc's.

    Good luck xxxxx
     
  11. Spinneygirl

    Spinneygirl Well-Known Member

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    Sorry for your losses hunni, ive had 2 MC's and am now 5 weeks pregnant. Dont give up hope xxx
     
  12. Emmalina

    Emmalina Well-Known Member

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    Sorry for your losses, sometimes life is so unfair :( I know how hard this is (trust me I do) but try and think as positive as you can xxxx
     
  13. JoD

    JoD Well-Known Member

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    Thanks all, I know I need to stay positive and focused it's just hard at times.

    EPU don't want to know as I'm not 6 weeks! Fuming, I'm 1 DAY out!! So I've made an appt to see Dr later today as I want this loss documented, I just don't think its fair that I may have to go through this time and time again until I have another 2 miscarraiges over 6 weeks! Wish I'd lied about my dates now. I don't think the people running these units actually know what we go through each time.
     
  14. CARNAT22

    CARNAT22 Well-Known Member

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    My EPU saw me at 5w 6 days last time? And they also saw me with my first M/c at 5w (m/c didn't occur until 8w though!). They were fab with me during both m/c's....

    They did advise me with loss #2 not to come in as there was nothing they could do by the time I was able to ring them [loss number 2 happened on a Friday and was pretty straight forward, I knew it was a clean m/c]

    On the upside it means no medical intervention is needed and no horrible internal scans whilst you are bleeding?

    Def go to your GP and get this all recorded on your file!

    Not sure how you are financially but you could look into getting tests privately?

    xxxxxxxxxxx
     
    #14 CARNAT22, Feb 7, 2012
    Last edited: Feb 7, 2012
  15. laurat

    laurat Well-Known Member

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    Sorry honey! Xxxxx
     
  16. JoD

    JoD Well-Known Member

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    Well the Dr is referring me to EPU so I'll expect another call from them tomorrow to arrange a scan to check all has passed.

    Carnat.. are you referred to a fertility clinic after your losses? I mentioned to Dr that I was willing to pay for private tests if it was within our budget, but was told I don't need any as I can get pregnant?? Now from my limited time on here I know that isn't always the case.

    What tests do they carry out? I want to find out as much info as possible. Is my best bet to contact a private clinic direct? X
     
  17. beanster

    beanster Well-Known Member

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    When I was referred after 3 mc to a consultant at the hospital I had an internal exam on first visit and then an ultra sound. Blood was taken as well. My OH had to give a blood sample too and they checked our chromosomes to see if they were incompatible and causing miscarriages.
     
  18. CARNAT22

    CARNAT22 Well-Known Member

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    I am currently under the care of a recurrent miscarriage clinic but overall this falls into 'fertility and gynecological health' so this will be why your Dr is confused? Specify you want the recurrent miscarriage clinic next time you go to see your GP.

    My recurrent miscarriage Dr tested the following:
    1) my womb to make sure it is clear and my lining is of a certain thickness (internal scan - checking for fibroids / cysts etc)
    2) Check my blood - blood tests
    3) Check mine and OH's chromosomes - blood tests for us both
    4) Check my egg quality (again with a blood test)

    I had a lot of blood tests - 14 vials in one sitting - plus another blood test on a different day. I also need to rebook the scan as they sent me on the wrong cycle day. I need the scan when I am on my period :shock: :shock:

    The Dr said there is only 30% chance that these tests will pick something up [so 70% chance my recurrent losses will remain unexplained].

    If they find a problem with my blood clotting then I can have injections / treatment and this should keep me pregnant next time.

    If it was fibroids or a cyst (which it isn't) then I'd have been offered surgery.

    If it is a problem with my egg quality or mine and OH's chromosomes then we'll be referred for IVF.

    So it's pretty scary!!! However I do not want to have another miscarriage so I went for all these tests willingly and happily. I'll find out more on 2nd March !!

    Sweetie, maybe look into seeing if there are any recurrent miscarriage clinic's you can see privately?

    Mine is NHS but they have been pretty crap (sending me for scans and blood tests on wrong date - cancelling scan at last minute etc)

    I going to check my health care policy with work and if this covers me I'll go private after I get my results :shock:

    I know you must feel so frustrated and obviously don't want to have another loss BUT I think you should push your GP to at least try and help as much as he can (I mean maybe there are some preliminary tests he can do??) or else consider going private.

    xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
     
    #18 CARNAT22, Feb 8, 2012
    Last edited: Feb 8, 2012
  19. JoD

    JoD Well-Known Member

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    Thanks beanster and carnat for info.

    I've got a lot to think about and going to spend the next month weighing up my options. I have emailed a private clinic asking for an estimated cost to see if it is something we can consider.

    Also thanks sunbeam, missed your post yesterday. I'm going to look into agnus castus, am I right in thinking it can lengthen your luteal phase? I've not been temping but when using opks if I ov on the day of surge mine is 11 days but if I ov the day after surge only 10 days. I get ov pain on both days so can't really go by that. I know with 1st mc baby must have implanted well but wondering with this one being so early if this may be a possible cause.

    Anyway I've just booked a holiday for June, so at least I have something to look forward to!! x x
     
  20. CARNAT22

    CARNAT22 Well-Known Member

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    Where did you book hun?

    Was so tempted to book a week in Kefalonia for June (my Birthday is in June!) but I'll wait a little while longer.

    If you have any other questions, just ask

    xxxxxxxxx
     

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