Advice regarding seeing GP please.

[Selina13]

Hi ladies,
I'll try to keep it brief, my hubby and I have not been using contraception since 2010 and initially we were laid back just hoping we would get pregnant. By 2013 we were starting to get concerned as nothing had happened. I started to do opks but never got positive test so we went drs. We have just basic tests and hub had sperm tested which was all normal. GP queried poly cystic ovaries but I had non if the symptoms, we were referred to fertility specialist but the day the appointment came I found out I was pregnant.
unfortunately I had a missed miscarriage at 11 weeks. AUG 2013
We were devastated but I got pregnant again (without using opks or timing sex) but again it ended at 8 weeks NOV 2014.
We have continued to use opks and have sex regularly and keep healthy but nothing has happened since.
I'm 29 and hub is 35 so we really feel ready for our family to grow. We feel our life is on hold and it's really affecting my mental health and our relationship.
I'm concerned about the length of time it took to get pregnant and then the miscarriages.
I know I won't be seen until I have had 3 mc but I really don't feel I can go through it again and it's taking so long!
I'm going to see my new GP on Wednesday and wondered if you had any advice on how I should approach it with him.
I know I'm under 30 and the previous professionals have said "oh your young, 3 miscarriages is quite normal!" But this is so unhelpful when I feel my life is passing me by.
Every time I hear that a friend/family member is pregnant it really upsets me.
Any replies are welcome even to tell me I'm being impatient and overreacting! Tough love welcome!
Thanks ladies. Xxxxx

 

[Blueflower]

That's horrible of the doctors to be so blasé about your miscarriages. Could you maybe say you don't want to have to go through another one just to get seen? Its a really unfair rule.

I don't think you need tough love, TTC is hard enough for anyone and we are hard enough on ourselves. When I was being hard on myself last time, I imagined what I'd say to myself if I was a friend and it was much kinder!

Just come on here and rant every time a friend or relative gets pregnant and parades around, it will make you feel better.

 

[Selina13]

Thank you blue flower. I know your right but I am aware that some women have been unable to conceive at all and may think I am overreacting!
I'm thinking I will explain exactly what I have said on here but was wondering of any suggested treatment or test options if anyone had been in same boat.
It's shit isn't it? We grow up and it's automatic right of a woman to be able to have a baby, sadly it's much more difficult and more complicated than that. It's so unfair.
How long have you been ttc? Xxx

 

[Selina13]

Blue flower, I'm sorry I didn't see your ticker! When are you starting ivf? Xxxx

 

[lisey]

You're not getting any tough love from me just virtual hugs instead
I know how you feel, I have had three miscarriages and it took a year to conceive the last time. There is a lot of anxiety about it taking just as long and of course the worry about another miscarriage.
If they have thought PCOS before then they should investigate this more, I am sure you can have the polycystic ovaries but not the syndrome or the other way around? not completely sure but its worth asking for more testing on this. I don't know how they diagnose it whether it be bloods or a scan etc.
I doubt very much that they will do any miscarriage testing at this point, they always go on about 2 being common it is a silly rule and I think they should test after 2 as it is so distressing.
I take it they have done day 21 and full bloodwork for thyroid, diabetes etc?

Just tell your doctor exactly how you're feeling and you never know, if you get a sympathetic GP this time, they may consider some earlier tests xx

 

[Selina13]

Lisey thank you!
Yes I had those tests in 2013 early in the year. I had had hormone tests in 2012 and the doctor said I had 'higher male hormone' but it was never discussed further or followed up?!!
Just in limbo now.
X

 

[lisey]

Is that why they suspected PCOS? I think too much testosterone can cause some issues but meds can be given to rectify as far as I am aware. Push for more tests hun. It amazes me that they notice something but then do nothing about it xx

 

[Selina13]

Yeah it's strange isn't it. I will mention it when I go tomorrow.
Thanks Hun. X

 

[lisey]

Hope all goes well. Let us know how you get on xx

 

[Bethyboo87]

I'm sure I saw somewhere that usually doctors will only check for problems after three m/c, but if there are potential fertility problems (e.g. 12 months ttc) they'll see you after two. Best of luck to you xx

 

[MelC2011]

Good luck for your appointment.
Let us know how you get on.
Sending big hugs lovely xx

 

[Gabrysia]

Hi Selina, just wanted to say good luck for your appt tomorrow! As far as I know After 1yrs of unsuccessful trying you shouldn't have no problems to see specialist and what a horrible doc to say that is common to have miscarried ! Can't believe, did you change GP or your surgery? Anyway don't leave till you get referral to specialist. Will keep my fingers crossed for you!

 

[Selina13]

Aww thanks ladies.
I think I will just be totally honest and see where that leads. Hugs to you all and thanks again for your kind words and support. Xxxxxx

 

[Selina13]

Hey ladies here's an update, I went and saw a lady doctor who was very sympathetic and acknowledged that my concerns were valid given the time it took for us to concieve and has arranged a scan of my ovarys to see how things are, a hormone test and a day 21 test.
She explained that following these tests she could refer to a specialist.
Phew, I'm glad I went and something is happening!
I told her how I'm feeling and how it's affecting our lives and she got it, I wasn't brushed aside like it was nothing.
Thanks ladies. Xxxx

 

[lisey]

That's great, I am so pleased she was helpful xx

 

[snowbee]

I'm pleased your appointment went well, it makes a huge difference if you can see someone who can understand you and you get on with. How long do you have to wait for your tests to start?

 

[Selina13]

I have to wait for my next cycle (day 25) as I'm due AF today for blood tests and should get scan appointment letter in 10 days or so.
It's so hard when you put so much into ttc, I even left my job working in child protection because I was struggling after the first mc and didn't want to be doing the job if it happened again which it did.
It's hard when you give up your career because you can't get pregnant! It leaves you just wondering what's next?!
I just hope something happens soon. X

 

[lisey]

Are they not doing your bloods on certain cycle days? They usually do one set of bloods on CD3-5 (I think) and then another later in the cycle, 7 days after you ovulate (day 21 bloods) xx

 

[Gabrysia]

Hi, great to hear that, not all docs are like the ather one you did have but they give really bad opinion. Fingers crossed you will get to see specialist soon. Good luck !

 

[Selina13]

Lisey yes they are checking my hormones (about 10 different things) and day 21 ovulation one but my cycles are long so will be day 25 for me.
She didn't say anything about earlier ones in cycle. X