Advice For New Mums Who Plan To Breastfeed

[DebbieM]

I've been thinking about this for the past few days and thought that I would post here in the hope that I might be able to help some of you who plan to breastfeed your babies once they arrive.

When I found out I was pregnant, I wasn't sure I wanted to breastfeed but as time went on, I knew I definitely did.

I was pretty naive and thought that you got your boob out and the baby sucked and that was that.

The reality is far from it.

It's difficult. It's stressful and it can be very sore!

I'd say to any of you that want to breastfeed, PLEASE, PLEASE seek help if you have trouble in the early days. If your baby fusses and doesn't latch on properly, tell someone and have a breastfeeding counsellor come and help you. There is so much help and support out there for breastfeeding mothers now that people don't realise is there until they actually need it.

I have had a hellish time with feeding. It's been horrible at times and I have shed many a tear over it due to frustration and pain. I've been left feeling like I am a terrible Mother on occasions and it's all been down to feeding.

I have had help now and things are better. After 4 weeks, we're still not 100% with it but it's not hurting AS much as it did and I am enjoying it more again now. You might put off getting help because you think it will be embarrassing having someone watch you feed, but trust me, when you really want to feed your baby but it hurts, you'll do almost anything!

The other advise I can give is to make sure you use nipple shields if you get sore and Lansinoh is a very good cream for cracked and sore nipples.

I've not posted this to scare anyone so please don't think that... I just wish someone had told me beforehand that breastfeeding isn't always something that is easy (although I realise that for some, it is!). Had I known though, I may have been a little better prepared.

Good luck to all of you who plan to breastfeed. It is one of the best things in the world, even if it is hard at times.

 

[Jade&Evie]

THANK YOU.

Can't believe Luke is 4 weeks old!

 

[Suzie and Faith]

Thanks for that Debbie
I've never been 100% sure on the idea but i've said i'd like to try and I will definitely make the effort to get help if I need it. I don't think i've thought about how it works too much before, as you said you just presume you put the babies mouth at the boob and there you go... but i guess it's not that easy!

Well done you for keeping it up, hope it gets even easier for you!

 

[sarafet]

thats really helpfu debbie

i understand how tiring it can be, i'm a student nurse and had a health visitor placement last year, we spent a lot of time with breastfeeding mums and it was really horrible how down they got when they weren't managing. i think a lot about breastfeeding is support though, i know a lot of the mums we visited could have done with a supportive husband/partner at times

glad you are doing a bit better now, i'm really looking forward to it, really hoping everything goes smoothly and i can do it

sarah xxx

 

[mummysarah+co]

i tried breastfeeding my daughter but i found it so hard and very painful because she was a bit prem and didnt have the instinct to latch on properly, i carried on with the advice of the hospital breastfeeding counseller and i did for about 3 weeks but to no avail, some women and babies just cant do it but that hasnt stopped me wanting to try again this time round! it was so rewarding wen she was feeding and we got a good bond from the short time we perservered.
fingers crossed for this time round!
there are some wonder women out there waiting for someone to ask for help and advice and id say they are well worth talking to and another thing to remember is to not beat yourself up if you cant breastfeed or have difficulty if you're stressed your baby will sense it and we all want whats best for our LO's

 

[happy-chick]

I agree with all of the above, i had a very simular experience but with the right help & support im still bf now and im enjoying it as its no longer difficult

 

[Happybunny]

Thank you so much for your advice. I am sorry it was so hard for you, but I am glad things are getting better.

I am really keen to breastfeed, but I know, from watching my poor sister last year, it isn't straight forward. She had a terrible time too.

I have been trying to get as prepared as I can (I've been to an NCT and a Sure Start workshop and trying to read as much as I can find), but I know nothing will really prepare me until baby is here and I have to get on with it. It is great to know there is so much support out there and you have found it useful. I certainly will be calling on people to help me!

 

[sarah2807]

Thanks for your advise Debbie. it's nice to know that not everyone finds it easy because if we do find ourselves in that situation I think it will help us feel that we aren't bad mothers and it's ok to ask for help. I know I'm really worried about not been able to do it properly so I'm glad there are people who are trained to help and otheres who have struggled but got there in the end.
I'm glad things are getting better for you-hope t continue's to get easier.

 

[Becky]

The thing about breast feeding is that if you only half heartedly try it (because you feel you should or its expected) then you are unlikely to succeed.

Breast feeding is hard for at least the first 2 weeks for a number of reasons:

1) You have never done it before
2) Your baby has never done it before
3) Your milk supply will fluctuate from not enough to too much
4) You are the only one who can feed baby so its emotionally and physically draining
5) Baby hasn't settled into a feeding routine

This sounds like its a lot of effort, and it is. However, it is worth it. After 2 weeks your milk supply should start to settle down, your baby will start feeding more regularly and you will become more practised at latching baby on.

I went through a tough 2/3 weeks before things started to get better and through that I worried that I wasn't good enough to feed my baby and that I'd failed twice already (not b/f well and had emergency section) and kept thinking about giving up.

I had a lot of help from the hospital and my community midwife and from my OH who did nappy changes through the night so I could just concentrate on feeding.

It did get better and it was so worth it. It was, and is the best thing I have ever done. It was so hard but the joy of being able to feed my own baby was incredible.

The other thing was the convenience. I know a lot of people think bottle feeding is easier but I disagree. At night to feed Lucy I would lift her out of the moses basket, feed her and put her back all without getting out of bed. Through the day I could pop out for a walk or into town or over to my mum's without worrying about how long was I going to be, how many bottles should I take etc.

There are times when, for whatever reason things don't work out and breastfeeding just doesn't suit.

But, if you are going to try, you have to be prepared to give it 100% effort and you have to do it because you want to. Not because you think you should, or because your relative or friend says you should.

 

[lfc_sarah]

Thank u for the advice...

I do plan to breastfeed, although im aware it can be hard

 

[kellysomer]

Debbie, i agree!!!!!

I am so proud of feeding Morgan and so appreciative of the help i have received from NCT and various other places that i am going to look into becoming a breastfeeding advisor.

I want to give someone else back the pleasure and great feeling that i get when i feed him. I so nearly gave up but its so worth it to continue...

 

[loz]

I agree, I found it easy to begin with then got really sore nips and panicked that I wouldnt be able to feed my bab. I should have asked the MW sooner about it and she realised that I had my technique a bit wrong and had mastitis! After I had sorted both out with anti-biotics, better technique and the cream that Debbie recommends, everything has been fine with BF.

It is incredible how our bodies produce such a good thing as breastmilk which is all your baby needs for nourishment - definately ask if you have problems and go to any breastfeeding classes that the MWs put on. Try not to have your waters break during the class like me as you dont remember anything!!!

 

[Ginnymarie]

hello debbie

so nice to see you back.

I am really sqeamish about my nipples, can't even touch them but hoping bf feels a bit different and i get used to them being abused as such

I ahve bought the nipple shields and the cream already, bit in advance but i am determined to give it a go and ask for help if I struggle.

thanks for your words of wisdom
x

 

[Sydneysmum]

As mother of a 9 year old breastfeeding seems a long way off to me now but what I will say is that it was the most personally comforting thing I have ever done. I did have problems in the beginning - I couldn't latch him on without stamping my feet in pain and the thought of his little mouth coming towards my sore nipple seemed intollerable.

But...I found nipple shields so helpful and with a little help from the breastfeeding support group I attended (attached to my local doctor's surgery) I got over my problems. It was the most convenient way of feeding my baby. At night, I could just reach across, lift my son out of his basket and feed him without even getting out of bed - I have wonderful memories of being cosied up with him in the early hours of the morning. I fed him on the bus, in a cafe, in the car in a car park - I only wish I had the opportunity to feed him in the library!

Ultimately, if feeding yourself doesn't work out, the most important thing a child needs is a confident, relaxed and happy mother free from guilt. For those who have yet to try breastfeeding, please remember that this is only one aspect of a child's life. Yes, there is no doubt that breast is best but it's not the only way you can show your child that you love them.

I lay awake at night thinking about feeding this baby. Can't wait...[/i]

 

[charlie84]

Yep definately agree with debbie.
I have found breast feeding quite hard. Its still early days for me so still finding latching on to be quite painful at times. Its not at all how i imagined brestfeeding to be.

I do recommend the Lansinoh cream for your nipples, its really helping me.
I have the nipple shields but have yet to try them out.

I agree with asking for help from the midwife at the hospital or the one who visits you at home. I found my midwife who visited me at home to be great, she spent some time making sure we were latching and how to hold baby whilst feeding.

 

[DebbieM]

I'm glad that people have replied to this post with their own experiences. It just goes to show that when you are having problems and feel like you want to give up, that there are many others out there who are/have been in the same position and have come through it.

Things have improved drastically with regard to feeding for Luke and I over the past 3 days. It's been amazing. I'm no longer wincing in pain and Luke seems a lot more settled than he was - probably because I am less stressed and tense and babies pick up on that.

All I will say is if you can't breastfeed after trying, don't be hard on yourself. Trying is the main thing but DO get support before giving up. I am glad I haven't given up but without support from the Health Visitors and Breastfeeding Support Worker and of course, Matt, I'd have put Luke on bottles now and there is a chance that may have made me depressed.

People will tell you over and over that "it wil get better". You won't believe it but it is true. It DOES get better. It's a huge learning curve for you and your baby!

 

[Tillytots]

thankyou to Debbie and all boobie feeding Mummies who have left us advice I'll be back for more I expect

I think I am in for a shock how hard it is potentially going to be but I WILL try and definately get help if its not working before getting stressed out. Had I not been warned it will be very hard at times I would almost certainly have given up so big thankyou for the advice. Im looking forward to giving boobie feeding a shot

 

[Becky]

I think its also worth mentioning that it isn't any harder than some aspects of pregnancy/labour etc.

I know my some people have really hard 1st trimester with sickness/tiredness etc. and think they'll never survive the rest of their pregnancy if things don't improve but we all know that (for most people) it does get better, you just have to persevere and you get there in the end.

I think the problem sometimes is that we expect things to get easier after the baby is born... I know I thought that the hardest bit would be labour - yea right!!

 

[cinnamon81]

Thanks for posting this, its nice to have some honesty. I've got so many leaflets about breastfeeding from midwives appointments but none of them say anything about problems, yet my two closest friends gave up BF after a couple of weeks as it was too hard.

I just hope the support is there for all who need it.

 

[DebbieM]