Would You Pay....

[maria1976]

We already have a fund in place where we both put £25 in a month each for this. Although it is for her to do with what she likes but.................we are hoping will be put forward for education. Although we have missed payments this month I want Ruby to have more than I had so its really important to me, I left school at 15

 

[Morganuk]

Most defenatly.

I think most people would as they would always wonder what if.
I want my kids to be totally different from me and work hard at there education.

 

[CoreysMummy]

Yup 100%.

 

[claire2711]

Yep

 

[Laura_James&Amber]

Yeah I'd definatly pay for it but Amber would have to save up a little bit too, especially if she wanted to go out clubbing every night and eat loads of take aways

 

[HappyAlice]

Many many people go to Uni because their parents push them to it because they think it's the right thing. Many of these people end up in tens of thousands of pounds in debt and a degree that they won't use, or won't get them a job in a normal village/town/city (media, politics etc). Not everyone is academic and shouldn't be pushed into academia. There is money to be made in lots of sectors especially hairdressing, plumbing, electricals, that don't require big expensive degrees. At the moment my son wants to be a teacher and I will fully support that if that is what he really wants to do. However I won't tell my children they HAVE to get a degree to be happy, or to get a good job/run their own business for themselves.

 

[mary70]

there is also a hell of alot of help out there for paying the fees and you dont start paying them back until you are earning £15.000 or more and then it is very little they pay back and if its not all paid bk in 25 years it is wrote off

 

[Happybunny]

Many many people go to Uni because their parents push them to it because they think it's the right thing. Many of these people end up in tens of thousands of pounds in debt and a degree that they won't use, or won't get them a job in a normal village/town/city (media, politics etc). Not everyone is academic and shouldn't be pushed into academia. There is money to be made in lots of sectors especially hairdressing, plumbing, electricals, that don't require big expensive degrees. At the moment my son wants to be a teacher and I will fully support that if that is what he really wants to do. However I won't tell my children they HAVE to get a degree to be happy, or to get a good job/run their own business for themselves.

I do agree, you do not need a degree to be happy and have a job you love. I have many friends who do not have degrees and are very happy and/or earn very good salaries.

We do have an expectation that our daughter will go to university, we both did and had a great time and it has enhanced our lives. However, we also want our child to be happy and so if she chooses not to go, that is fine. We are saving and have made financial provision for her so that she will not get into debt, should she wish to go. I would rather she have the opportunity than her hate us for not giving her the chance.

Also, if she comes away from uni and does not get a high paying job, that is not a failure either. Working hard and getting a degree is an achievement in itself and the three/four years learning and having fun before joining the rat race is worth the money.

 

[SarahH]

Defo, if they wanted to go to Uni then they shall go, but my Dad has a trust set up for all grandchildren so they can go to uni or indeed, if they excel in something and require private school earlier, the trust will pay

 

[glitzyglamgirl]

Nope - thier rich grandparents are taking care of that

I have promised to buy my eldest a car when she passes her test though, as long as she can pay for MOT/Tax/Insurance herself.

 

[Sammystar]

definitely

It's not just about the degree, it's about so much more. I went, with the help of my parents, and it was the best thing I ever did.

I'd better start saving my pennies though

 

[Foxxi]

Its great to hear different views, but I cant help but feel differently... maybe because I didnt go and went straight from college into full time work... and never had any longings to go to University.. a lifetime in school (what seemed like it anyway) and 3 years at college, was more than enough for me. Even if I'd have wanted to go.. I know that I wouldnt have been able to.

I have been quite successful in the career paths I have chosen, without a degree... and the 3 years at college where a total waste of time... other than a 3 year piss-up.. yeah, I got my qualifications, but they didnt get me anywhere.

I feel that going more or less straight into work and not getting money off my parents for Uni has made me a stronger person .. stand on my own two feet as it where. I had a mortgage at 21 on my own..and if it werent for that..I can honestly say, I wouldnt have what I have now. The day I left home, to move into my new house, my father was sat in the kitchen and he said quite loudly to my mum 'I'll give her 6 months and she'll be back'.. I thought 'right ya *******, I'm gonna do this..I wont be back', sheer determination made me make a go of my new house and mortgage..and I did it.. 9 years on my own..I did it. But I understand now his reasons why he said it... he wanted me to succeed with it.. and he has since said.. that if he hadnt of said what he had said.. I wouldnt have made it and he wanted me to prove him wrong.. which I did. However his words that day broke my heart! Tough love... apparently.

Thats just my experience and opinion of it all anyway... I am certainly not saying that thats what I think about any of you.. we are all different.. and my opinions and experiences may not be for you..which is why I asked the question about Uni in the first place..I wanted to hear your view.

I say now that I wouldnt pay for Fynns university.... but thats now... I'd probably have a total change of heart in 18 odd years time.

 

[elaine22]

It depends on what the university funding/loan system is like in 17 years time but if we could afford it then we would definitely help her, particularly if she has a passion for a particular subject/career. OH and I both loved uni and had a great experience. However, if she gets to 17/18 and is unsure about what she wants to do then I will urge her to explore her options, not go to uni because it's the done thing and possibly end up unhappy - although I loved uni, I wasn't entirely happy with my course and am now planning to embark upon another course to get me into the career I want, because I didn't think things through enough when I was 17.

 

[Squiglet]

If the girls wanted to go I'd help them with course fees and books as much as possible.. but as for living expenses... welcome to the real world You get to work.

I left home at 17 and had to work while at college. Then I went to uni... I got a loan, paid for everything myself because my lazy arse ex spent all the money on weed and I had a kid at the time too... it was hard, but I still did really well... and I really felt proud afterwards because I did it all by myself. And I was much more dedicated to my course because to waste that opportunity and money was a huge thing, whereas my younger colleagues who had had mummy and daddy throw money at them were more likely to fritter away... When the Working Families tax credit people made a mistake with my award and left me with just 3quid to live on, my parents helped me out but I'd left uni by then and my loan had stopped, and I had nothing.

Life is hard, I know we should make it easier for our kids, but then they need to learn about living and being grown ups too.. if we run around after them then they won't ever learn how to be independent.

Even if Tia/lil miss don't go to uni, I expect them to leave home at 18, they can still come back if things go belly up, there will always be a bolt hole... but they need to be on their own. There was nothing I did better with my life than my own self emansepation from my parents. Uni is a great opportunity for them to leave home and be on their own so I will support that.

 

[Magic Monkey]

IMy parent's supported me hugely when I went to Uni, I had a loan that paid my rent, they paid my fees and gave me a set amount each month for food/books etc, then I worked for my spending money. This worked really well as I was never stressed about money, but I understood the value of it. My housemate didn't have a loan or a job for 3 years and her mum paid for everything, she wasted huge amounts of money on total rubbish!

I will encourage Ella to do the best that she can, but as far as uni goes I would want to know that she was studying towards a career, I have so many friends that went to uni and are now in low paid jobs that don't use their degree at all. On the other hand my DH didn't go to uni and he earns significantly more than me and was earning for the 4 yrs that I was at uni (I am a teacher so I do use my degree!)

 

[leckershell]

I would help as much as possible towards anything Ryan wanted to do, football coaching, dance lessons.. who knows what his thing will be, but if it's anything excessive I would hope he would be prepared to learn the meaning of work also. I'm happy to help in anything I can but if he's of an age where he can help himself too, I'll strongly encourage him to try to pay his own way (but I'll obviously still try to pay) if you know what I mean.

Nobody helped me out or Nat, and while it's taught us the meaning of work and the value of money, I sometimes wonder where I would be now and what I would be earning had I managed to get a degree or some sort of higher qualification.

 

[Foxxi]

it was hard, but I still did really well... and I really felt proud afterwards because I did it all by myself. And I was much more dedicated to my course because to waste that opportunity and money was a huge thing, whereas my younger colleagues who had had mummy and daddy throw money at them were more likely to fritter away... When the Working Families tax credit people made a mistake with my award and left me with just 3quid to live on, my parents helped me out but I'd left uni by then and my loan had stopped, and I had nothing.

Life is hard, I know we should make it easier for our kids, but then they need to learn about living and being grown ups too.. if we run around after them then they won't ever learn how to be independent.

Even if Tia/lil miss don't go to uni, I expect them to leave home at 18, they can still come back if things go belly up, there will always be a bolt hole... but they need to be on their own. There was nothing I did better with my life than my own self emansepation from my parents. Uni is a great opportunity for them to leave home and be on their own so I will support that.

Thats more of less what I was trying to say in a roundabout way! Very much like my upbringing..'and it didnt do me any harm' I tell ya!!!

Squig... you word things a lot better than me.. maybe I shoulda gone to Uni

 

[tom]

Life is hard, I know we should make it easier for our kids, but then they need to learn about living and being grown ups too.. if we run around after them then they won't ever learn how to be independent.

I think that this thread has examples of people who's parents have supported them and they have turned out alright. (sammystar, magic monkey, me)
This thread also has examples of people who had to support themselves and they turned our alright as well. (squiglet, foxxi)

If we choose to believe everyone who has posted (and I think we should, no one has a reason to lie here), then the only reasonable conclusion we can reach is this...

"being supported through university by your parents has no effect on whether you turn out to be a responsible adult or not".
=> you probably wont ruin your child if you pay for their university education so feel free to pay for them if you want to.

 

[Sammystar]

As far as I'm concerned, my parents gave me an opportunity which opened many doors, and for that I will always be grateful.

I had worked Saturday jobs since the age of 13, and I worked for all my spending money through secondary school and college. When it came to Uni, my parents sat me down and we worked out an 'allowance'. They were no way wealthy people, but they gave me what they could. I learned to manage on a limited budget, and I think it taught me so much about money, which has always helped me since.

I knew if I'd wanted extra spending money I would have to work for it. During my second year I did do the odd shift in a bar, and whilst teaching In Berlin I was able to give private English lessons to top up my grant. But during my final year I decided it was better to be skint and awake, than have money and be knackered! I concentrated on my studies, and just made do financially. I lived in a pretty grotty place......some would say that was character building stuff too

Once I left for Uni at the age of barely 19, I never went back home to live. I'd spent a year in Germany as part of my studies and was able to go to Berlin and get a great job with my degree. That opportunity made me into a very independent and confident young woman, and I thank my parents for helping me with that. If I can do the same for mine, I certainly will.

 

[Suzie and Faith]

I can see where Foxxi is coming from as I know lots of people who went to uni because they didn't know what else to do and got it paid for them by their parents and did a lot of drinking!

I would help Faith any way I could but I hope that if she went to uni it would be because she was passionate about what she wanted to study.