Would love some advice....

[Betty-Boop]

Hiya all,

I'm new to this site, i desided i needed some advice and can not talk to anyone in person yet as i'm not ready so thought i would try a forum.

Basically i'm 17 (18 in about 2 months), I've been with my boyfriend about 2 and a half years, hes 24, yes a little older but we've been happy from the start. We have started house hunting recently and have got everything sorted his parents are completely supportive of us and helping us out alot (I don't see mine very much as have not lived with them since i was 12). I have a really good job as a Paralegal in a South West Law firm, and im working my way up the ladder....

So really i've been really lucking in life since i met my man, but then these past few weeks i've been getting more and more worried that i'm pregnant and i'm so scared that every time i go to get a test, i end up walking out of the shop getting back in my car and driving back home.

I'm pretty much sure i am pregnant, i've been researcing the signs and been getting alot, and i'm sat here now confused and in need of help.

I'm sure you have better things to be doing than to be reading this, but i would be so gratful if you could take the time to give me your opinion,

Many Thanks

Betty-Boop
(Don't want my boyfriend to know i'm talking about this yet so having to use this code name for a while until i sort things out)[/code]

 

[xashleyx]

hun i would go and take a test or go to the doctors for a test, its the only way u will know if you are pregnant or not, will your boyfriend be happy if you are?
let us know how you get on hun
good luck
xx

 

[Minxy]

You've got to bite the bullet and take that test! Speculation is no good for your health.

Sending you courage, hope you get the result you want xxxx

 

[Riley's Mommy]

hi hun i agree with others replys. there isnt really a way to know without doing a test.

*sending more courage for you*


let us know how you get on

 

[lil_miss123]

yer i think u should take a test and let us all now haw you are getting along...

and dont worry we always got time for you if you want to have a moan a rant were here..

im 18 and pregnant by 12 week and my boyfriend is in the army i was scared to tell im but things will be allright sweet heart.

 

[Betty-Boop]

Thank you, all of you.

I agree do need to take a test, i have tryed so many times to even just buy one but never can make myself...I did also try to tell him today when he came over, the words i need to tell you soething came out then i trailed off into stuff about the house we are buying! Such a chicken!

I'm so worried about the outcome, how it would effect everything i've worked so hard for. I know if i am i will keep it because me and my partner both have agreed on that. We both want children in the future together, but its just all a bit too soon!!


Thank you so much for your words of encourangment...

 

[Minxy]

I know exactly how you feel. I'm a little older (30) but fell pregnant at the most inapropriate time.

I left a well-paid career to start something new which paid crap but I loved. We were engaged and the wedding was all booked (and paid for) by my parents.

I'd been in my new job 4 weeks when I thought I might be pregnant. I bought and took the test in a shopping center on Christmas Eve. Subconciously I thought it would be such an unromantic way to find out it would mean I wasn't pregnant.

But I was. I cried for days. Work weren't pleased but they have to be fair and I go back next week. My wedding's been moved to May and my dad agrees the small financial penalty is well worth a grandson!

My point is, it can seem like the worst timing in the world, but if you are pregnant and proceed with the pregnancy, you will cope. Because you'll have to! I look into my son's eyes now and I know I can't imagine it any other way.

It sounds like your relationship's strong enough to take what life may throw at it and everything else is in place. You need to know if it's all going to change soon or the bootee shopping can wait a few years, that's all.

Take the test and good luck. xxx

 

[Betty-Boop]

Thank you Minxy..

Yes your right about the timing, i wouldn't be so concerned if this was happening in a few years time but its not its happening now and i need to face it head on.

I know that our relationship will be fine, it will be tough at first but we always get through, i'm mainly worried about how his parents would react.....

When they first met me they loved the way i was so career minded and that i (and i quote) 'have my head screwed on' then when they found out i was 7 years younger than him they were shocked and it took them about a week to regain confidence in me, they soon over looked my age and realised that me and their son are in love and that we know what we are doing and now we get on perfect! I don't want them to change their opinion on me, i don't want to be a disappointment.....

Another thing I'm worried about it work, i don't want them to think less of me or sack me because I'm doing so well and working so hard......

I think the reason i won't take a test is because of all my worries.....

Sorry to keep going on guys, i haven't got the courage to tell anyone else just yet, scared of being judged....

 

[Minxy]

A baby will mean a career break, but not the end of it! Your age can only go in your favour here, you've got DECADES of being a wage-slave ahead of you (for better OR worse ). They can't sack you and being as it's a legal company they'd have to be pretty careful how they handled you anyway.

I'm with you on the in-laws. Mine are very religious and I dreaded telling my MIL I was expecting a child out of wedlock. She cried.....with joy!
It's difficult to comment when I don't know them and they may well be shocked. But a baby really is a blessing, and they'll come round and be ecstatic to have a grandchild. In my experience people are absolute suckers when it comes to their grandkids, they spoil them worse than their children!

It's interesting you use the word disappointment, it's the one I used to apologise to my family this time last year. If you go on to have a baby you will make yourself and your family unbelievably proud, that I can promise. If not now, then in the future.

Please take the test!

 

[Betty-Boop]

I will, i'll make sure i go and get a next week.

In regards to the in laws, looking at it from a different piont of view, with my man being their only child me having a baby would be their first grandchild, me and him are really their only way of having a grandchild so i suppose after the initial shock they would probably be happy for us....

I think i'm acually excited now!

 

[Minxy]

Keep us posted won't you?

 

[Betty-Boop]

Sure will, thank you all so much!

 

[mummykay]

do a test, ul drive urself up the wall til u do!!

 

[Riley's Mommy]

i waited about a week or 2 before testing. and i DID drive myself up the wall lol.

good luck with the test. and no matter the result, we are all here for you to talk to

 

[Betty-Boop]

Hiya all,

Well thought i would update you all...

Today i had the mother of all cramps, then suddenly i started bleeding extremly heavly and have been all day now. This was scary and strange for me as i never have cramps or bleed heavy!

I'm not sure if this was my delayed period (3-4 weeks late) but i'm thinking it is!

Does this mean i don't need to take a test, surely i cannot be pregnant if i've had such strong bleeding today?

 

[neeko_1]

Hiya all,

Well thought i would update you all...

Today i had the mother of all cramps, then suddenly i started bleeding extremly heavly and have been all day now. This was scary and strange for me as i never have cramps or bleed heavy!

I'm not sure if this was my delayed period (3-4 weeks late) but i'm thinking it is!

Does this mean i don't need to take a test, surely i cannot be pregnant if i've had such strong bleeding today?

hey hun, well 1st if you where late on your period, then you could be having miscarriage or just have a late period...

to be sure take a pregnancy test ASAP (tomorrow) it will still show if you are pregnant..

if you are pregnant and have been bleeding the go to A&E ASAP
even if it has stopped

i'm i making sense??

 

[Minxy]

Lots of early pregnancies end in what could be considered a late period. Just take care of yourself and take it easy for a couple of days. At least now you know for sure and it will all work out for the best.

Good luck for the future and don't forget us in a few years time when you're trying for a baby

 

[Betty-Boop]

[quote="Betty-Boop":2hx7dr5u]Hiya all,

Well thought i would update you all...

Today i had the mother of all cramps, then suddenly i started bleeding extremly heavly and have been all day now. This was scary and strange for me as i never have cramps or bleed heavy!

I'm not sure if this was my delayed period (3-4 weeks late) but i'm thinking it is!

Does this mean i don't need to take a test, surely i cannot be pregnant if i've had such strong bleeding today?

hey hun, well 1st if you where late on your period, then you could be having miscarriage or just have a late period...

to be sure take a pregnancy test ASAP (tomorrow) it will still show if you are pregnant..

if you are pregnant and have been bleeding the go to A&E ASAP
even if it has stopped

i'm i making sense??[/quote:2hx7dr5u]

Hiya, Yeah i think i understand what you mean... i'll do a test tommorow after work....

 

[neeko_1]

good luck hun

hope everythings okay

 

[*saulino*]

Hi

Just thought ide wish you luck and hope your okay'
Katrina