Why are people so rude?

[Keeponhoping]

Ok, so I'm 37 weeks pregnant, was in drs the other day and some random old dear said to me, did I see you at slimming world last night? I was quite shocked at first and my facial expression must have said it all, and I replied I might need to after I give birth to get rid of the baby weight. Then she said oh sorry you just have the same hair colour and dress on as that other person. Then she said makes a change to someone asking if you're pregnant and not. I jokingly said to her, I will let you off this once as she was elderly but I was a bit offended by it really as was in front of everyone else waiting in the surgery. I'm really not a massive weight, or maybe I am, better get to slimming world once baby is here! I just can't believe that complete strangers are so rude! X x

 

[Keeponhoping]

P.s. I've seen bigger people than me and they're not as far gone as I am. Shouldn't let it get to me I suppose. X x

 

[WinterWolf]

No one looks slim at 37 weeks pregnant so I wouldn't worry about that. I feel like a whale at only 20 weeks. Sounds like she was just old and made a genuine mistake between someone dressed similarly to you. Probably should've kept her mouth shut if she wasn't 100% sure though. At least she didn't say "you're big, you're about to pop" or any of that garbage...

 

[Sazlarxo]

I once had a customer ask me when I was due and I wasn't even pregnant! It was also right after my then fiancee and I had split up 6 months before the wedding and I'd been diagnosed with PCOS. I just wanted to punch her in the face

Also, I do sometimes find that older people use the fact that they're "old" as an excuse to be rude. Better to ignore their behaviour and hope they go away quickly.

 

[MoominGirl]

I think that for some reason everyone thinks it's ok to have an opinion on how you look particularly if you're pregnant.

I have the opposite problem in that I'm very very petite and even at 30 weeks I look exactly how I normally look but with boobs a bit bigger and a very neat little bump. Don't get me wrong I'm very lucky and the comments from normal people who know are all meant well and I'd much rather hear those than 'look how big you are'.

It's actually the professionals that are making me more uncomfortable. When I went for my 28 week check the midwife was like 'there's no way you're going to measure 28 weeks' which I didn't but I hadn't even got on the bed for God's sake!! Then we went to visit a maternity unit last weekend. The staff were making small talk and someone asked how far along I am. I said 30 weeks and was met with raised eyebrows and 'oh is everything measuring ok' in a tone that suggested there was something wrong with me. I clocked the badge 'midwife'. I'm sure that these comments aren't meant unkindly but it's actually not very helpful to be made to feel like I should be worried. It's a bit unnerving really.

I'm learning to ignore any more silly comments.

 

[Donna88]

Those comments from midwives are shocking; surely as midwives they will have come across many different size women. Some women don't show at all but have perfectly healthy babies.

People do feel like they can comment on pregnant women though. Everyone has an opinion

 

[MoominGirl]

I'm one of those that really took a long time to show. I actually took some maternity clothes back at the weekend as I don't think I'll actually wear them and I didn't buy much in the first place.

I'm a nurse but in a day unit and many of our patients have been coming for years. I'm just starting to show enough now that a few have them have noticed but have discreetly asked a colleague as they're not sure if I would have announced yet!! At least they're being a bit more respectful which is more than I can say for the midwives.

I don't know why it's so acceptable to comment on others, big or small.

 

[BabyWomble]

My MW told me I was small right up until my 28week check up then she changed her mind. Yesterday at 34 weeks she told me I look huge. Made me laugh. You can’t win!

 

[MoominGirl]

It's just ridiculous isn't it? I think midwives are probably the only people that seem to be able to comment on your appearance so flippantly and get away with it!!

 

[Vintageling]

I get asked if I'm pregnant quite alot but I haven't had my bfp yet even had my mum once sat rubbing my belly where really I was due AF and mega bloated