Why are people so nasty

[Tanya4beauty]

Ive had this all the way through my pregnancy but people seem to be getting immense joy out of a slim person getting 'fat' as they put it. I'm all bump tbh and although I'm feeling a bit more flabby all over I don't think I'm doing too bad.
Yesterday one of my clients first words to me were cor you're getting a big old girl now and then proceeded to ask me how it felt to be fat after being so slim. I had to soooo bite my tongue and try to explain its different to being fat.
Her words have really cut deep and I know I'm being stupid but it really upset me and i was in tears this morning. I'm getting sick of it now. Today I've had 'look at the size of you now', and cos I had a beef burger and a hotdog at my sisters BBQ I got 'are you eating for two, suppose you have the excuse now' Ffs why is everything I do related to being 'fat'.

I cant wait til I've had my little girl and it was all worth it cos I'll get my size 8/10 figure back and all those nasty people will still be just that - nasty and rotten inside.

Rant over, this is the only place where people understand how I feel! Xx

 

[pinkclara]

hi tanya

know how you feel; it seems that it doesn't matter what size my bumps have been - they're never good enough for some people!

with dd and ds i constantly got "omg you're only...........weeks!!!!!!" and "what a size!"

with this pregnancy i have constantly had to endure "where are you hiding that baby?" and "are you sure you're eating enough?"

ARRRRRGHHHHH - leave me alone!

 

[Loula]

people tbhink theyre being funny but theyre really not.
Im not gonna lie i love food since being pregnant but again im all bump and have been watching what i eat to a degree i balance it out.
carry on hun xxx

 

[leesey]

I hear ya!

I was also size 8/10 before bubs, and I've really had a tough time adjusting to people's comments. Fair enough I don't think most people intend them to be cruel or upsetting, but they clearly have no idea how often we hear it or how damaging it is for our self esteem. Others clearly get some form of glee out of watching skinny people grow. I mean I was never a total skinny malink, I've always been curvy, but now I'm just so aware of my body changing. Especially in the heat with everything swelling up.

I just know it will be worth it in the end, and I'll get some resemblence of my old figure back, I just have to think of bubs and I feel happy with what my body's doing. I just wish everyone would realise how delicate our confidence is at this time in our lives xx

 

[Kirsty.Y.84]

What I find most annoying is people saying that I might as well ear what I like as I have an excuse! Like being pregnant is just an excuse to pig out! I do say to them that although I'm pregnant I still want to watch what I eat but they never understand! You can't win, you're either told you're too big or you're told you're tiny, people will always comment! xx

 

[mrz85]

you aint fat your growing a little baby !!whatever people will always pass comment x

 

[Lolly85x]

Booooo!!!! Try not to let it bothe you, and enjoy your burger! Ha! Next time tell them at least your pregnant, what's there excuse!!! That'll shut them up!!! Baby will all be worth it xxx

 

[MrsKLloyd]

If it makes you feel any better hun its not just slim ppl who get these sort of comments, I think ppl don't rly understand how they sound sometimes and how it plays on our minds.

Im over weight, have been since my son in 2010 but started slimming world and excersize plan in August 2011 before getting pregnant, ppl have since assumed I would pig out n use the excuse to eat anything any time n say rather rude things but I try to explain im still doing sw and excersizing where possible for my babies and my health!
don't take what they say to heart hun just give ur bump a rub and remind urself you will have a beautiful baby soon so stuff everyone else!

 

[zoe82]

I get this all the time, I was letting it bother me to start with, but its become so boring now that I just ignore it! I know its easier said than done, but if you can ignore it you won't get it as much. What I don't get though is its usually from people that have had children themselves and think they know it all, I am determined not to be one of these people once my LO is here, just no need, let people get on and enjoy being pregnant! x

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[Beximillian]

How rude! Reading everyone's comments I think I must have been lucky as I've not experienced this at all, but I can imagine how it must make you feel. I don't think I'd be able to keep it in, I'd end up having a right go at them! x

 

[zoe82]

That's why I've just started to ignore it, as I've found if I respond I get the whole hormones thing, you can't win, so I've given up!

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[Karate Kid]

Oh sweetie, I can completely relate….

I have battled with eating disorders in the past so my body confidence has never been brilliant but at the risk of sounding extremely self-centred pregnancy has knocked my confidence a lot…. The only saving grace is that I know I am part of something pretty magical and I need to keep healthy.

I was predominantly a size 8 pre-pregnancy, a healthy weight and very active, I always ate well and only allowed myself the odd treat. I have given in to temptation far more during pregnancy but I have still been eating well too.

I am so fed up of people thinking that it is OK to be rude and it really gets me down, if it wasn’t for my hubby I would be a wreck. I know I have put on weight but I also know it is not excessive and I can loose it after LO is here. I would never go up to someone and tell them they have put on weight, so why people feel the need to let me know every five minutes is beyond me!! The fact that I have to bite my tounge after a comment gets me even more, but the comments are mostly from collegues....

Anyways rant over…..

Just hold your head high , be proud of your pregnancy weight and remember you will be the yummy mummy who will have a gorgeous little bundle at the end of all of this.

Big hug xx

 

[FirstBabyEek]

I dont understand why pregnancy seems to open up a gateway where people make seemingly nasty comments that they wouldnt dream of saying at any other time.

Saw my SIL at the weekend, who's always making comments and this week I'm pleased to say DH stepped after the 10th comment of 'sure you'll fit through that door way'. Partly because I'd been in tears an hour before looking for an outfit for a wedding I'm due to go to next weekend. Needless to say I couldnt find anything that looked nice.

Its just ridiculous that people think that they can say these things. Dont worry hunni, we all think you are a beautiful xxxxxxxxxxxx

 

[Tanya4beauty]

Thank you girlies, I knew you'd all make me feel better! I can't get my head around the fact people think they have the right to comment just because you're pregnant. Like firstbaby said they don't do it normally.
And karatekid you don't sound self centred at all, that's exactly how I've felt. I've really struggled to watch all my hard work of watching what I eat and all the hours of exercising go to pot.
I really wish I didn't care! On the other hand I'm so so so excited to be having my little girl and I can't wait to meet her. If people would just leave off with the comments I would feel so much better. I've been in tears several times to hubby too and he just reminds me that he loves me and that I have something very special in my tummy.
Well girls we are on the final stretch now so we may as well enjoy it!!! Chocolate here I come!!! Lol xxxxxxxxxx

 

[BumbleTumble]

ive also really struggled with this, ive battled eating disorders and body dismorphia. it was actually right up until i found out i was pregnant that i was considered 'bulimic'.

people are insensitive, but we are all doing an amazing thing, we are each growing a little person, and that's worth more than any stupid comment from ignorant people.

xxx

 

[leesey]

I've been in tears several times to hubby too and he just reminds me that he loves me and that I have something very special in my tummy.

Unfortunately this support is the one thing I seem to be missing in this case. My 'dearest husband' won't look at me when I'm undressing, barely touches the bump, refuses to even contemplate dtd and makes the occasional fat joke. I've told him already how my self-esteem is at rock bottom, but he continues to make 'funny' comments to friends and family about how he'd rather eat a hot curry than have sex with me (for getting the baby out), and how beside me no one notices how much bigger he's gotten!
He's not normally this insensitive but he can't get it through his thick skull that it's really really damaging my confidence. I've never had body hang ups before, but I feel so low about it just now and it's only likely to get worse. Nothing I say seems to get it through to him, I think he assumes I'm being touchy because I'm 'hormonal'

So unfortunately, in my case, I've been in tears several times because of hubby xx

 

[Tanya4beauty]

I've been in tears several times to hubby too and he just reminds me that he loves me and that I have something very special in my tummy.

Unfortunately this support is the one thing I seem to be missing in this case. My 'dearest husband' won't look at me when I'm undressing, barely touches the bump, refuses to even contemplate dtd and makes the occasional fat joke. I've told him already how my self-esteem is at rock bottom, but he continues to make 'funny' comments to friends and family about how he'd rather eat a hot curry than have sex with me (for getting the baby out), and how beside me no one notices how much bigger he's gotten!
He's not normally this insensitive but he can't get it through his thick skull that it's really really damaging my confidence. I've never had body hang ups before, but I feel so low about it just now and it's only likely to get worse. Nothing I say seems to get it through to him, I think he assumes I'm being touchy because I'm 'hormonal'

So unfortunately, in my case, I've been in tears several times because of hubby xx

Aaaw you poor thing! He's the one person you need the support from. Sorry you're not getting the support from him. I hope he soon realises how upset you are, I don't think some men know how to cope with our feelings during pregnancy. Hugs to you and just remember the special little person you're growing inside you whenever you feel down. Xxx

 

[Little bean]

People are so horrible I just walked into a supermarket and 2 girls walked out one looked at me and said I hate pregnant women they look disgusting. Not happy

 

[CathC]

I had a lady on Friday morning say "cor bet your feeling this heat" Mmmm why cos I'm pregnant I asked myself, she was five times my size with obesity! I would no more dream of walking up to an overweight person in the street on a lovely summers day and say "cor you must be feeling this heat"!!! How rude are some people! I have a neat bump, large but I'm 35 weeks gone, however it sits on my size 12 frame!
So ladies yes we do know how you feel when really insensitive people open their fat mouths!
Rant over xxx

 

[Tanya4beauty]

People are so horrible I just walked into a supermarket and 2 girls walked out one looked at me and said I hate pregnant women they look disgusting. Not happy

How bloody rude!!!! God there are some awful people walking this planet. A lot of people think pregnant women are beautiful so hold on to that thought! One of my customers told me she feels like a lesbian when she sees a pg lady cos she loves it so much! Not sure how I felt about that comment lol!!!