When to tell the parents and in-laws

[Nurse 26]

Hey was just wondering when people are or have told parents and in-laws about their pregnancy? I want to wait till 12 weeks same as i will tell my friends and others! but alot of people say you should tell your parents before that??

 

[Lacey's Mummy]

I was at my mums house when i did the test as they knew we were trying so they found out straight away even before OH!! Dunno when in laws found out though as we have no contact with them so they would've prob found out the same time i told my SIL'S at around 14 weeks!

 

[Countrybumpkin]

It depends.

We are both very close to our parents and if anything had happened in the first 12 weeks we would have wanted their support through the hard time. Also with them knowing it made things easy when we popped around for dinner and things and they understood why i felt like i did some days.

I guess it is a personal choice, depending on how close you are, how often you see them and how close they live. My in laws live next door, and I am very close to my Mum and Dad, who live less than 10 miles away.

If you don't feel right about telling them, then don't it is for you to decide.

 

[Kateplus1]

It was two weeks after my missed period that I was brave enough to take the test. I think I was more scared of it being negative...

It was my mum that persuaded me to take the test as she said I "Looked preganant", tee hee. Mum always knows!!

It is a very very personal decision. I suppose it depends on how close you feel to your family, and how easily you can talk to them. All of my immediate family now know, including partner's family. My superviser knows, but that is all.

My criteria is: "Would I be comfortable talking to this person if something was to go wrong?" If the answer is yes, then I tell.

It is so exciting you just want to tell everyone....and 12 weeks is such a long time...argh!!

 

[Nurse 26]

Thanks guys, we are fairly close to both and we are currently staying with my parents for a few weeks while my hubby is working where they live so feels rather strange living here and them not knowing anything. but also i feel that if i tell my parents its not fair to leave the in-laws out and they might be a bit upset when they found out my parents know, also my mother in law works in the same hospital as my mum so they know each other and see each other fairly often.

 

[Nurse 26]

Thanks kateplus1 thats a great way to look at it and the fact is i would tell them if somthing went wrong anyways.

 

[Kateplus1]

It feels so good to tell and I think that contributes to staying positive and happy. People will be able to support you through the good times and the worrying times if they know

I won't tell the gossips in the office yet....I will just leave them to speculate

xxx

 

[BabyGagasMum]

Its entirely your decision, its a personal one. If you feel you want to wait til 12 weeks, go for it. Theres no rules!

 

[Emmamb]

Hiya,we told parents and siblings straight away,again I'd have wanted their support if somethin had happened xxx

 

[honeyloops]

I've told a few people and purposely avoided telling others until 12w scan. Choice is yours! x x x

 

[mablestarr]

I told my mum when I was about 8 weeks just cos I was down at hers and wouldn't see her again for a couple of months. Told in laws at about 10 weeks. Then told friends etc after my 12 week scan.

Entirely your choice though, I would have loved to have the scan picture and possibly slip it into a pile of holiday snaps or something and then show my mum that way, just couldnt keep it quiet as I was so excited. xxx

 

[pinkymum]

As some of the others have said its a totally personal choice. I told mum two days after my BFP, we haven't had the best of relationships and I wanted to get it out of the way, thankfully she took it better than I thought....Yep nearly 29 and still worried about what my mum thinks lol. My dad (they're divorced and mum is remarried) knew I was trying and I told him the day after my BFP. I knew he'd support me whatever happened!

Good luck, you'll know yourself when you want to tell them

x x x x

 

[WILMAFLINSTONE]

With DD my mam told me I was pregnant ha yes mams def know dont they....so when I had it confirmed I went and told my parents officially and of course they were delighted!
Told his parents the same day too I was 8 weeks!

Sadly both sets of parents have passed away so we had no parents to share our news with this time but weve told very close friends and some family members from 5 weeks kinda on a need to know basis but the rest will find out on Monday after my scan when we officially announce!

Like the ladies have said its kinda what you feel happy doing and feel most comfortable with xxx

 

[Nanc]

Apart from my OH I have only told my best friend. My mum lives a couple if hundred miles away and although we speak on the phone every other day, I haven't seen her since I got my BFP. So I have decided to wait until I see her rather than tell her on the phone. But I find myself putting off a visit till I am a bit further along as she will be obsessed once she finds out and I don't want to have to manage her obsession as well as my own!

 

[Nurse 26]

Thanks for the replies everyone, we have decided to wait until 12 weeks to tell both sets of parents (as long as they don't guess before) instead i have told my two best friends, so really enjoying chatting to them about it hurry up 12 weeks...