Whats the best way to tackle this one?

[handbagqueen]

A couple of weeks ago Lily decided that she wouldn't sleep in her crib, after 2 nights of picking her up cuddling, feeding and constant tears i thought sod it and brought her into bed with me. This was much better for me as i was able to sleep! Also helped as she was waking every hour or so to feed or cuddle
Now over the last couple of weeks she has gone from going to bed easily to taking about 2 hours to finally settle. We've also had a period of her waking throughout the night every half hour or so... At the moment we're still taking about 2 hours to finally settle but she's only waking every 2-3 hours, sometimes there are larger gaps between but she's still in my bed.

Dh sleeps in the nursery during the week anyway as he has to get up really early for work but now he's having to stay there during the weekends too as we only have a small double so won't fit very comfortably.
I love having her in bed with me but i really feel like my relationship with dh is suffering as by the time i've managed to get her to sleep my dh is getting ready to go to bed! we don;t see each other during the day as he is at work and then i am ratty when he gets in as i'm still having to deal with lily as she is going through a stage of crying when dh tries to change nappy or hold her etc so i'm still having to look after her- this isn't helping matters either as he feels left out and I'm knackered!

I've tried doing bedtime earlier and later, tried giving her a bath before bed and a massage but i seem to have the only baby that gets more excited by this rather than chilled! I've tried different music- waves and lullabys on low. The room is always dark and quiet apart from the soft music.

The last couple of nights she has started off in the crib but then when she wakes she just will not settle until shes cuddled up next to me in bed. Like I said I love this but my dh is adamant that she has to get out of our bed in january when his work has calmed down I just don't know what to do for the best anymore- i keep reading different theories and have now got myself into a muddle over whether i should co- sleep or not.

 

[Mildly]

Have you seen those cots that you attach to the side of your bed which make it look like an extension of your bed? Then at least your OH would be able to be back in the double bed

If you google bedside cot quite a few come up, hope that helps

 

[handbagqueen]

thanks mildly unfortunately i don't have enough room in our bedroom for one of those.

i spoke to some people in RL about this yesterday so hopefully will be able to tackle this more confidently- i was just confused over how to deal with my husbands, mine and lilys needs.

 

[Charlie:-)]

Maia used to go straight off when she woke at 2/3am but then at 5am she would take a couple of hours to settle again cause she would just want to play, and babble and shout to us from her cot in our room. In the end I used to put her into bed with us and she would settle no problem and stay asleep then till we got up. Then she started to get wise and wouldn't settle in our bed. One morning I was so frustrated that she wouldn't settle I went and put her in her cot in her room and I sat in the nursing chair just listening to her playing and babbling to herself and her teddies. I then though to myself "what on earth am I doing sat here, I know she's safe, she's not going anywhere I may as well go back to bed". I crept out of the room so she couldnt see me or she may have been distracted again and I lay in bed listening to her. After about 10 minutes she went silent. I went to check on her and she had fallen asleep, so I went back to bed. That morning she slept till 8:30am whereas before she used to be our personal alarm clock at around 7 - 7:30am. From then on she slept in her cot in her own room and she started to sleep through from her very first night in her own room.

I'm not suggesting you move Lilly to her own room but maybe if she wont settle you could just let her play in her cot and you stay in the room with her and see how she gets on, she may settle eventually or she might not, but worth a try.