What have people got against my wedding day?!

[MrsDraven]

Seriously it's starting to grate on my nerves. I've had a million people let us down already, too many to even go into, but my bridesmaids are pissing me off. My maid of Honour is fine, she's the only one that seems to be bothered but the other two are just frustrating me. I've asked them several times if we can arrange a time to meet up to find the dresses. Heard nothing. Gotten to the point where I've just said look, can you mail me your dress sizes so I can get the dresses. No replies. They've been online speaking to each other loads, barely spoken to me unless it was to ask for help with a uni question, but mention bridesmaids dresses and nothing. It's not that long til the wedding, I need them to actually get some balls and tell me they no longer want to be bridesmaids. F**ks sake.

 

[Kayelle]

Grrrr I feel angry for you! That's a little rude of them! It should be an honour to be asked to be a bridesmaid! I'll be your bridesmaid lol

 

[Geminiblue]

tell them that unless they respond to your messages youre going to have to assume that they dont want to do it. That should shock em but you have to be prepared to let them go not just call their bluff. Honestly, when it comes to weddings people get really odd and inconsiderate xxx

 

[MrsDraven]

I've told them several times and gotten no response so I'm just assuming they don't want to and are to pussy to tell me. Fine. Their loss. I have my maid of honour so screw them. It's just frustrating though when they live about 15 minutes away, don't work and pretty much have no excuse but can't be bothered and yet my maid of honour lives 7 hours away, works a full time job and has taken the time to book time off work, book a hotel and travel and get her dress, on top of offering to help with the cakes the night before even though she'll be exhausted. Screw them, at least I know my maid of honour is definately a true friend if she can do that.

 

[stargirl]

Obviously you choose right in picking your maid of Honor! She sounds like a true friend. I would email your other bridesmaids and tell them that if they don't want to be bridesmaids then all they had to do was tell you and that as they have paid no interest in the wedding prep your prepared to drop them as bridesmaids.( this is just my opinion) I'd then go and pick a stunning dress for your maid of honor to wear and have lots of fun planning your fabulous big day!

 

[MrsDraven]

She has a stuuunning dress yay! I'm going to email them once more and if they ignore me again, they no longer have bridesmaid duty.

 

[stargirl]

That sounds like a plan hun, I think after giving them one more chance, if they don't change, they you need to wash your hands of them, otherwise you're going to start feeling negitively about your wedding and it would be a shame to let them spoil it for you! Glad you got her a fab dress! Hope everything goes well for you.

 

[MrsDraven]

Thank you I think it's just stressy because no-one is taking us seriously. They, or my family rather seem to think we won't go through with it because apparently we're too young and immature. Despite being more mature than all of them put together and my sister who they were fine with getting married when she was younger than me. But her husband and his parents have money and huge houses so they got the seal of approval, my family are all money obsessed it's really frustrating because they're trying to put a damper on our day because we don't have money.

 

[LuW]

Boo to money!

Can't buy you happiness at the end of it!

The wedding I shot this weekend had a bit of this, Photographer, two brides maids, 30 guests, and the best man all pulled at the week before! Poor girl phoned me in bits begging me to do her photos.

at the end of it, if they want to mess you about- Don't let them! Cut them out and if they start asking ignore them! It's times like this you learn who you really need and want in your life xxxxxx

 

[MrsDraven]

I really can't be bothered with it, we've had enough stress with people messing us around since we decided to move the wedding forward. Some people didn't know about the baby so we can't explain to them why it was pushed forward but the bridesmaids knew damn well why we pushed it forward you figure they'd be a bit more understanding. Sucky.

 

[leesey]

I found this as well, I ended up with just my MOH in the end, and she was brill. Just write them an email saying you have had no choice but come to the conclusion that they don't want to be involved in the wedding, and that you will just see them as guests on the wedding day.

 

[frankie707]

Dont think I would be giving them another chance tbh. It's such a special thing to be a bridesmaid and as such you should be actively helping the bride not her trying to get in touch and ignoring it!
Good luck on your big day! It's brilliant

 

[Bellarina]

hey hun i agree with the others tha you should just tell them they can be guests...i wish id been able to do that. I had to have my 2 cousins as my bridesmaids, and after much effort i managed to get them to th bridal shop to get a dress sorted...when the dresses arrivd it was a nightmare getting them to come up my mums just a 2 min drive away to try them on...then same probs getting them to come for alterations..then they picked holes in everything about the dresses when they cost altogether £200 each! plus wed bought their flowrs, shoes, underwear, jewellery and bought them a present. then on the day everything was too much of an effort for them, at one point my dad was sorting my train out on my dress! they pouted and frowned all day and played on their fones during speeches and didnt eat any of their food which cost a fortune, , then they left early with their boyfriends (they did this on my hen too) so in hindsight i wish id just told them screw u il have my mates (tho this would have caused a rift in family)
My advise...chu
ck them before they can do anything else to spoil ur day coz if theyr not excited and helping at this point theyr not going to!

 

[LikeJohnnYoko]

I didn't make the right choice in mine. When it came down to it, 2 of my friends ended up doing the bulk of the bridesmaid type work. The time just before my wedding (as in after I arrived at the venue) was confusing and stressful and rushed. Things I specifically addressed to them were completely ignored. I'm trying to distance that from my day but it's hard to.

 

[MrsDraven]

At least I know I can rely on my maid of honour, she's the only one giving a crap, she has her dress sorted she's getting her shoes, she's helping us with the cake because the wedding cake person pulled on us the last minute so she's baking our wedding cake for us. She's an absolute diamond, the others can go screw tbh.

 

[DaisyPurple]

When are you getting married hun? XXX

 

[MrsDraven]

December.

I've 100% given up on one of them now, friendship and otherwise. Last time I spoke to her she got in a major strop because I had a different opinion to her regarding university fees [yup pathetic] and now she's just outright blanking me. Sadly she seems to have turned into a typical 'I am holier than thou because I study at university' type of person. I give up I can't be doing with arrogant people. She never bothered answering about the dress so I really can't be arsed with her she's become immensly stuck up in the space of about a month. Sad really, she was a decent person at one bit.

 

[LuW]

Offt don't get me started on the changes SOME people make when they go to uni. I've actually like 4 friends now, L being the closest! Tony has to be because he's my big bro, C I'm with all the time with her going out with Tony and I go riding with the other girl and train her horse when shes ill and thats it.

The rest wont even talk to me because I haven't gone to uni or because I want to be a stay at home mum even though they know I'm pretty unable to work anyway! Can't do most things involving physical work (bending mainly) and can't sit in a chair for more then 15mins! So I don't want to be putting myself through pain all day to be in a ratty mood with my kids when it's not their fault!

We all used to be so close too =[[

 

[MrsDraven]

Same here. It's odd though it's literally been in the last week she's just gone off on one. She ignored me for ages anyway and deleted/blocked me on Twitter. Then I added her thinking stupidly that her Twitter was playing up again because she had problems with that recently and readded fine. Never spoke to me once until I had a different opinion on something she posted and she hasn't spoken to me since. She's taken on a holier than thou, I'm right you're wrong attitude all of a sudden for no reason. I'm so glad I decided against going to uni, OH would have probably dumped me by now if I wound up like that, and I wouldn't blame him either.

 

[LuW]

I'd have been hung drawn and quatered! By myself. LOL!!

I know that life suits some but I just couldn't be happy doing that. I'm a carer by nature and thats all I could ever do, why should I spend a fortune to do something I'm already qualified to do, and why should I care for others while someone else cares for my children.....

I'm lucky in the sence that L's jobs pretty stable, especially with what he's moving into mainly because they look after that core more then the rest tbh - Lads (and Lasses)that make the cut for what he's doing are few and far between! But his carer choice means we can but can't have what we want. Though he's said he'd rather get phone calls and texts through out the day and me there to take the photos of like first steps and things like that rather then be told about it at weekend because I've only just been told by the nursery.