what do i do

[lisa_davidson]

i came across a conversation saved on msn that was between my husband and a women he met on a night out. in it, amongst other things he said that he is only staying with me for our son, that he wanted out and that he wanted to arrange to meet with her and stay in a hotel! i am so shocked and absolutely devastated! so when i confronted him giving him his 'way out' he insists he doesn't know why he said it and doesn't want to split up...i feel betrayed and don't know what to do. please help!

 

[Suzie and Faith]

I don't think anyone can tell you what to do. Do you think your OH was serious about meeting up with this woman? Would he have gone through wiht it had he not be found out?
These sorts of questions are ones only you really know the answer to. Are you happy with him?

What he has said is awful and he deserves a slap! I'd be devastated if it were my OH and i think i'd have trouble believing it was all talk - but that's just me.

Sit down and have a think, by yourself, about him and what you want from him and life, and then have a long talk with him. In the end it's your decision hun.

Have some of these
I really hope it all gets sorted in a way that's not too painful for you, look after yourself xxxxxxxxxx

P.S feel free to PM me if you ever want a chat

 

[dannii87]

Aww Lisa, please try not to fret... And like BabyBee said, no-one can tell you what to do, only you know what you can handle and what you can't.

All I will say is that A) he's a plonker who didn't cover his tracks very well at all! and B) that there is more to life than worrying about what your OH is up to.

You DO have options though sweet, so try to keep your options open and see what will suit YOU and your situation best;

* Is there any way you could have a sit down chat with him and tell him that he's now put HUGE doubts in your mind and that if things are going to work, he needs to work OVERLOAD to help out with the issues he's placed onto you?

* If you feel comfortable, how about going on a "trial separation"? This would be more for your benefit than his and you can see how you would cope going solo with parenthood - although, it does pose the problem of perhaps wondering constantly what he is doing etc.

* Suggesting to do more things as a couple. It's difficult to FORCE things, anything in fact. A) this would get him off the net in the evening, B) you are spending more time together etc.

Sometimes in relationships you have to find the spark that made you fall in love in the first place. It can be easily lost and maybe talking to him might shed some light on why the hell he thought it'd be ok to chat like that to another woman

My motto in a relationship is do not do or say anything to anyone that you wouldn't feel happy doing or saying IN FRONT of your OH Easy to say coming from someone who is SINGLE lol!!!

I do feel that most people stray or get doubts when there are issues they have in the relationship (some do it just for the buzz). Maybe he is feeling insecure or unloved etc?

The only way to get to the bottom of it is for you both to talk.

If all else fails, here are some necessities whilst dealing with untrustworthy men;

xx

xxx