TTC and state of mind

[Sweets2018]

Hello,

We've been TTC for 3 years now and nothing's happened so far. We have been having some tests done over the last year and a half and so far there is no indication that there is anything wrong with me (apart from very low TSH levels measured in May but it normalised by the time I got an appointment with endocrinologist). I have always thought/felt there is a problem with my hormones as I suffer from migraines (so did my mum and she received hormone treatment to achieve pregnancies) and hair loss. I have just had hycosy test and tubes were fine.
My husband might have a problem with his sperm count as it has been below normal range every time (he's had 5 sperm analysys done).
The thing is, even though we are trying to become pregnant, neither of us are 100% sure we are ready for this. As for myself, I have never been able to imagine myself being pregnant or being a parent. I have never been maternal however when my sister had her kids I fell in love with my nieces and that changed my view of having kids - it made me like kids.

My question is, is there anybody else out there who has mixed feelings/uncertainty about becoming a parent? Do you think me not even being able to imagine getting/being pregnant is stopping me from conceiving? They say the mind is powerful...

Would be interesting to read your thoughts.
Thank you in advance

 

[Rosie2]

Stress can certainly have an impact on your overall health and wellbeing, although each of us will have our own individual worries. I'm sick of seeing the 'don't stress' messages in advice on TTC... I personally find that more stressful than anything, lol!

I have to admit I have worried that I might not be ready, and particularly whether having children will impact my career. I absolutely love my job, and as a self-confessed workaholic I'd be more upset at giving up that than anything else. I realised that even just a pregnancy, whether I took time out or not, would impact my career and I was quite resentful that I'd have no choice but to deal with that while my husband would have no impact at all. We did decide we would never go through IVF - it's just not for us, and we aren't that set on the idea of having biological children. Sometimes I wonder if that makes us less caring, but honestly neither of us want biological children enough to go through all of that. So that's our agreed limit - I'll take medication if it helps, but we aren't going further than that.

Anyway... eventually we decided we were ready, it was fine, and we started trying. But it's an individual decision for each couple and it's what's right for you.

Have they tested you for PCOS? I was diagnosed with PCOS and have had migraines and some hair loss/thinning (but has been controlled with metformin)

 

[Vintageling]

Yes mental health or the power to imagine yourself walking ect has a huge impact on you, now the care sector look at caring for everyone's individual faith, mental health and general wellbeing as this impacts your overall health. So stress ect can effect things. I doubt you not being able to see yourself as a mum is effecting it though as you obviously have the desire to be a mum or else you wouldn't be trying for a baby. Just try and keep things as low stress as you can which is really hard and just try and make time to just be happy do things that make you happy

 

[Sunflower1]

I think it's more likely to be the sperm count issue. Plenty of women get pregnant accidentally when they don't want to. There are things you can do to help sperm count I think. Weight is an issue if his BMI is too high. Alcohol, smoking, lack of exercise, even too much sugar can affect it. My OH takes Wellman vitamins. Eating less processed food can help and drinking enough water. It's best not to eat an acidic diet, to therefore increase vegetables and cut down on sugar and starchy food. There are fertility diet books.


I found dark chocolate good for migraines...the magnesium and flavonols in particular. I also stopped getting headaches after giving up fried food and processed food. It can be stress on the liver.


Good luck!!

 

[MoominGirl]

I agree with Sunflower - it's more likely to be the sperm count that's the problem. There are lots of things you can do to improve sperm health though. Good diet, exercise, not smoking, reducing alcohol and caffeine. My OH had low motility so we tried a lot of lifestyle changes as well as conception vitamins and his sperm results did improve.

 

[Sweets2018]

Hi everyone,
Thank you for your thoughts and replies, it's comforting to read them.

To Rosie2, I've had ultrasounds done and my ovaries look normal. I don't have any PCOS symptoms either.

With regards to my hubbies sperm count, we've been looking into it and he's taking vitamins esp zinc, he exercises every day, he doesn't drink nor smoke. What we are both guilty of is loving sweet treats (I love to bake). So we both could definitely cut down on sugar. But otherwise our diet is healthy, plenty of veg and home cooking.

My work has been stressful and I'm going to take a some time off to study and de-stress..Hopefully that will have a positive overall impact.
Thank you all again x