Struggling

[dita_parlo]

I've been finding it really hard these last few days. It sounds really strange and horrible to say, but I've always felt that I'll struggle to keep a pregnancy - has anyone else ever felt this way? I just have always kind of known that I would suffer m/c's and now it's happened twice I'm really starting to reconsider TTC. I don't want to go through all the heartache of this, and I just kind of "know" that it'll happen again! This feels horrible. Also, I might be talking total rubbish, but are recurrent miscarriages hereditary? Because my aunty had about 8 miscarriages and never had a child, my husbands parents had 3 miscarriages after him and never had another child. Is it something to do with early menopause??? My mum, aunty and nanna all went through the menopause between 34 - 38 so it's likely I will, at nearly 27 could this be affecting things??????

My head just feels all over the place and I really think I don't want to TTC anymore.

 

[LoopyLouize]

Ohh hun big hugs - I'm sorry you feel so down. I cant really answer your questions but I hope you do get a sticky bean xx

 

[Nurse 26]

Oh Dita, so sorry you are feeling down. i dont have a clue if m/c are hereditary. I know my mum and gran, aunt ect never had any so i guess that wasnt a sign in my case. Maybe you are just having a down day hun. Maybe a wee break would do the trick.

Hope you feel better soon. xxxx

 

[Spinneygirl]

Hi hunni, im so sorry your feeling down, im no expert but i wouldnt have thought they are hereditory. No one in my family has had one only me. Please dont give up TTC for this reason, try and stay positive and maybe a little break would do you good. Hope you feel better soon xxx

 

[dita_parlo]

Thank you ladies. I have been to my doctor today and told her how I have been feeling. She was really nice. I asked whether I have more chance of having miscarriages now than the average woman and she said yes I feel like such a failure as a woman. She advised me to come and see her as soon as I get pregnant again, but I just don't think I can cope with this all anymore. I mean, even if I go to see her as soon as I get a positive, she can't stop a miscarriage happening so why would I go??? I asked about being referred out and she said that would happen after 3 miscarriages. I'm seriously considering stopping TTC now. My husband has told me not to be stupid and he knows in his heart we will be parents, but I truly believe in my heart we won't be [natural] parents.

 

[laurat]

Hey honey, is this your first your trying for or is the wee cracker not yours in your photo. I have felt the same about the worry of not being able to have children and was so happy when I got my bfp. I also knew that I was going to m/c the week before I did even though noone particularly a rude dr listened.In terms of heriditory I have since discovered the my nana had at least one although it wasnt talked about in those days. She only ever had 1 child so Im wondering if there were more. I am just desperate for a bump but like you I dont know if I can keep going. We should I guess feel lucky to have had a bfp but I keep thinking do I want to go through this again? The answer for me at the moment is a resounding yes but I feel it slowly taking over my thoughts and I dont know if this is right.

I am happy that I have these forums though to air my thoughts as I think its really tough with people face to face as they dont really understand.

 

[cosmicgirl]

Sorry you feel so down, I know that nothing we say can change what is in your heart but I hope that you will acheive your dreams and we see a lovely sticky bean with your name on it soon x

 

[heartbroken]

Sorry you feel so down hun .. If its any help my mam had 3 miscarriages then went on to have me & my 3 sisters and none of us had a miscarraige (i had a stillborn baby boy).. I really do wish you all the luck and lots of xx