scared

[rosiee]

Hi, Im new! so forgive me if I don't quite get things at first...

Ok, so, my story.

Im 21 in two weeks, my partner is 21. We are not married, but have been together nearly 6 years. We have been living together while at university, and are graduating on Friday. After this, we will be moving back in with our parents until we can afford a new place. My partner (is OH other half? im not sure and don't want to sound like an idiot!) got a job 3 months ago, but has just found out his boss is in loads of debt and can longer afford to pay him, s he is looking for a new job.
My situation has been, I was an art student, and have always wanted to make a living out of making and selling jewelry and crafts online and at crafts fairs ect. My parents surprised me a few months ago, saying they really want me to do it and not just get stuck in any old job, so said they would support me while I make a go of it. They have even built me a little workshop in the garden. I am very lucky to have parents like them!! I've been working really hard at starting my little business.
I had been on the pill since I was 16, however stopped taking it at the start of may. I had been getting sickness for a while, and it had started happening immediately after taking the pill (we used condoms when this happened). The nurse at the clinic told me to stop taking them for a few months, use condoms in that time, then come back. I went back yesterday (we have been using condoms every time!! extra safe ones!!) and she said she would put me on a different pill. She asked when my last period was, and I realised I was late. She did a test, and it came back positive.

Am still in massive shock, as is my partner. We have always wanted to be parents, both of us absolutely love kids, he has lots of young nieces and nephews we have been involved with ect. We are in a very stable relationship. But i feel I've let my parents down. They were planning on supporting me and really wanted to see me make things work, and now all thats going to have to change. I am terrified of telling them. We are telling our families next week, after the graduation, but would really love some advice. I've been looking up money we may be entitled too, but it's all so confusing. I feel a bit lost. Im thrilled that we are going to be parents, but feel guilty as my parents will be disappointed, and scared because of our financial situation.

Sorry for the novel. If you managed to read all of it, thank you so much!! and please help!

Rosie x

 

[teampc]

First off congratulations

I think your parents will be happy to hear they will be grandparents, I'm sure they will react better than in your head

Also just because you will have a little one doesn't mean you can't still get your own business going as planned.d......in fact that will be better than a regular job as you will be able to do it around your little one I run my own business and it's finally started taking off the last couple of months, baby is due this week and it just means I'll have to work round baby now, but at least I'll be home with him

 

[spice]

i completely agree with what teampc has said . . . and was going to use her as an example! as i know she has her own business! having a little one really doesn't have to stop you, and in fact it could open you up to clients you didn't have before, as you never know who your going to meet at pregnancy classes ect!

my parents we're shocked, but so were we! and the main thing is that they will want you to be happy so once they realise how happy its making you they will forget their own worries! i'm 24 and was supposed to be going back to uni to do a new degree in sept but our little man has put a stop to that . . . for now!

so congratulations and wishing you all the best x

 

[BevG]

what better thing to do as a job while u got a bump? craft lots of new jewellery and sell it on ebay or something, buisness will be booming in no time and you will be supporting babe before u realise it.

 

[Xcitedmum]

I agree with what the other girls have said. Yes your parents may get a massive shock but they will get over it if given some time. Their hearts will melt when they see the little one. How far along are you?

 

[izzy1985]

I really dont post very oftern, I just tend to read alot for advice etc but had to reply when I read your thread. Although im a little older than you (25) I felt exactly the same as you when we found out I was pregnant. I graduated University and so far have done great and been really lucky and worked really hard, in getting my dream job and promotions along the way. I moved back home from where I was studying, saved for a year and then moved out with freinds to rent for a while. I met my OH in May 2010 and we found out I was pregnant in March this year so we hadnt been together even a year! I was absolutley petrified of telling my parents, they were so proud of how hard I was working etc and what I had achieved blah blah blah .... . I eventually blurted it out to my mum after sitting through about 4 different soap programmes one night when she was at home alone and I was so suprised by her reaction. Whilst I wasnt expecting her to 'tell me of' i kind of expected she would be dissapointed. I couldnt have been more wrong. From the start she has been so supportive ( I admit at first I was really unsure of what to do) and now she can not wait for her first grandchild. My dad was exactly the same, after the intial shock, he cried with happiness and is so excited, more so than anyone else I think!

My OH also has his own business that is really starting to flourish so I understand your concerns about that but I agree with what others have said, your own business gives you so much more choice/control over how you work, I think its great! His parents were also shocked but once that was over they too have been so happy and supportive.

Your mum and dad sound like great people, helping you like they have so far and im sure they will take this news in their stride and will be so excited to becom grandparents, even if they are a little shocked at first!

Sorry for such a long reply, it just reminded me so much of me!

Good luck and congratulations!

xx

 

[izzy1985]

Please excuse my spelling in that reply! Yikes!

 

[Squeakz]

What they said!! You'll always get some benefits to keep you afloat if you're in a rocky patch as well. I know its not ideal but for short amounts of time/to help those qho need it is what the welfar system is for!!!! But your own business sounds lsuh spesh with a LO (litte one)!!!!! Good luck on friday!!!! Just had my grad today (I'm 22 with a 9 month old) sinilar worries as you!!!!!!!!! If you need anything pm me, like I said I'm similar scenario in many ways!!!!! Let us know how frii goes _ want piccies!!!!!

Sophie xxxx

 

[rosiee]

thank you so much, all of you!! your stories and advice have made me feel a lot better It is really nice to be able to talk to people who have been in similar situations, its very reassuring! so thank you so much

Im about 5 or 6 weeks we think, I'm already desperate to get to the 12 week point! keeping our fingers crossed for everything.

Will let everyone know how things go with my parents, and also friday squeakz

Thank you all so much again!! x x

 

[ISH]

Congrats to both of you! Your parents sound lovely, I'm sure they will be very supportive and will make great grandparents.

As to pursuing your dream job, that is absolutely priceless and you are very lucky to have found your calling. I'm an artist too, and am doing it full time now, but it hasn't been easy making people see it was what I wanted from life.

If you want to talk about shops etc and starting your own business, do get in touch hun x And stay positive, you have every reason to!

 

[domestichuman]

Hi there, and congrats on your surprise baby

I am older than you, but I have been working since I was 15 years old. I am now pregnant and for the first time quitting my job to start my own business (like you, it will be crafts but fibre related - like knitting, crochet, weaving, dying, etc). Pregnancy and maternity leave is a GREAT time to be able to do your own thing. While the baby naps you can polish off a necklace or a set of earrings. When baby sleeps at night try to post some listings, get prepared for craft fairs, etc.

I know it's scary at first! Even though I am in my 30's I was so anxious and nervous! But your parents sound lovely and I am sure that even if they are also shocked at first they will be happy to welcome your little one by the time it arrives. Good luck with everything!

 

[Jayceesmumma]

Congratulations! as i was reading your post i was thinking the same as the other ladies.. what a perfect job for a stay at home mum! Everything happens for a reason babe and youve set yourself up with a good job just in time im sure your parents will be happy as they seem very supportive of you youve been with your OH (yes, other half ) for a long time so the relationship is stable.. not just a one night stand or new relationship (i was with OH 3 months when we fell pg) im sure they will be very happy for you!

Congrats on graduation and ur new little family xxx

 

[rosiee]

hello ladies!!! thank you, you are all so lovely and helped me feel so much calmer about everything! I can't thank you enough those who have offered help and advice on the shop thing too, i will probably be taking you up on your very kind offers at some point, so a few of you may be hearing from me soon its so lovely to have help and support from you all, i will definitely be on here a lot from now on!

well, yesterday was graduation. it was an amazing day, with both of our families there (they had a lovely day together too!) and this morning, we told them all. Everyones over the moon!!!!! it's such a relief, and feels amazing. My parents are so excited to be grandparents, and my brother and sister are so excited too, we were all crying with happiness this morning! it was amazing, i couldn't have asked for a better response. and my mum has already taken a trip to mothercare for some trousers for me as Im already struggling to do up my jeans, haha!

couldn't be happier right now, it's amazing. thank you to all of you again, your all lovely!
x

 

[Jayceesmumma]

Im so happy for you!!! Knew everything would be alright!! Enjoy the rest of your pregnancy!! xx

 

[Squeakz]

Oh that's amazing news!!!!!!!!!! Glad you had a good graduation amd glad everything went well with your families!!!! Now to just enjoy the rest of tour pregnancy as before you know it it'll be over and your LO will be here!!!!!!!!!! All the best and congratulations to you and your OH x