scared now

Discussion in 'Third Trimester' started by Linda, Jan 11, 2008.

  1. Linda

    Linda Well-Known Member

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    i think it's finally starting to hit home that we are going to be parents...... :shock:

    i asked o/h last night if he was scared and he said no!!!

    i'm carping myself now, can i change my mind???

    i'm worried i wont have any maternal instinct, other peoples babies dont like me much they always cry, what do i do if mine doesnt like me??

    how will i know what to do??
     
  2. purple13

    purple13 Well-Known Member

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    i think its a natural thing to be scared hon... i'm not feeling it too badly at the moment, but i think i'm still in denial about actually having a baby at the end of all of this :lol:

    i asked my other half if he was scared, and he said 'no' too - then he added, 'well actually yes, but only about changing nappies' :rotfl: :rotfl:

    i know what you mean about wondering if your baby will like you though. i read 'we need to talk about kevin' a year or so ago, and its haunted me ever since... :(

    but despite my moments of misgivings, deep down i know we're all going to be ok at this :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:
     
  3. paiges_mummy

    paiges_mummy Well-Known Member

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    I was scared shitless when I had paige, but with this one im looking forward to it.
     
  4. Squiglet

    Squiglet Well-Known Member

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    I never believe anyone who's about to become a parent and says they aren't in the remotest bit afraid... personally, if they aren't afraid of becoming parents then they really haven't fully considered what becoming a parent is (second time rounds slightly different though)... unfortunately there seems to be this stigma about being afraid.. but its natural...

    The responsibility is overwhelming and its scary... because you love this person soooooo much, and you know the big wide world is a dangerous place and you cannot always protect them against it...

    I actually think parents that are scared make better parents. They are already well aware of how important their children are... how unworthy they are to be this tiny miracles guardians and will do all they can to protect and care for this child.

    This is my second child... and I feel just as scared of her arrival as my first. I feel afraid everytime I send my first off to school in the morning... and I will do for the rest of my life.. :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:

    "We Need to Talk About Kevin" was a fantastic book btw... :) It dealt with a lot of feelings mothers have but are too afraid to talk about.
     
  5. Linda

    Linda Well-Known Member

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    Thanks for that,

    at least i feel more 'normal' now lol...

    i'm more scared about the huge responsibility of this tiny person that of the labour itself and i'm a total wimp..
     
  6. fothers

    fothers Well-Known Member

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    Thinking about labour doesn't bother me but the being a good parent thing is terrifying. I think we are all the same :hug:
     
  7. girlygirl

    girlygirl Well-Known Member

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    Im a bit the same...im not really scared. But im not used to babies at all!

    ive only held one or two babies in my life. and ill only do that if i like the mum, i just look and go ah usually. I know nothing about bringing up babies but have read the Gina ford contented baby book and found that really helpfull with feeding times, swadling, weaning etc. I plan to have a strict routine so this book has done good for me. My colleague used it on her 2nd and said it was great.
    I think tho when baby arrives that we know what to do as its a natural instinct, and we will learn.
    If you as a mother are calm then the baby will be too.
     
  8. Babylicious

    Babylicious Well-Known Member

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    awww you'll be a natural
     
  9. Kimbo

    Kimbo Well-Known Member

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    i think the same sometimes.
    ive also started panicking about carrying her up and downstairs! i cant get it out my head that something bad will happen :(
     
  10. KJL

    KJL Well-Known Member

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    I feel the same...i'm not scared about labour but I'm worried how good i'll be as a mum :? My hubby is amazingly paternal and very natural with children whereas, although I like kids, I've never been one of those people who is natural with babies and kids. My mum is amazingly maternal though and she said she was exactly the same as me and wasn't interested in children until she had her own...she says the love and feelings you have for your own baby from the minute he/she is born is overwhelming and natural. I do think think that I should be the same as I do already have strong feelings for "baby bump".
     
  11. samandbump

    samandbump Well-Known Member

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    im the same, espesh with our dumb dog under my feet all the time :hug:
     
  12. chrystaltips

    chrystaltips Well-Known Member

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    I have times where I feel exactly the same. It's completely normal. You're about to take a huge step into the unknown. It is scary as well as exciting as you have no idea what your life will be like and how you'll cope.

    As for having no maternal instinct, I think that's highly unlikely. It may take a bit of time, but once you've been through labour and see and get to know your baby, that you made, it will happen.

    I've never been that into kids, and don't go gooey about other people's but I know it will be different with my own :)
     
  13. pilkers

    pilkers Well-Known Member

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    i'm exactly the same... I have days when I'm worried about it and days when I'm so excited I can hardly sleep. It's normally when I'm lying in bed trying to get to sleep that I think about things like how will we manage when I have to go back to work, have I bought everything, will i be able to cope with a newborn etc etc.

    It does get on top of you..OH seems to be taking everything totally in his stride and isn't worried at all.

    I also have days when I panic about the labour part cos I know I'm not good with pain and I'm dreading it. I worry more about not being able to have an epidural cos of my medication. If i have my medicine within a certain time span of going into labour I can't have an epidural and I'm terrified that I won't be able to cope with the pain and I'll feel a total failure... its all swings and roundabouts with me at the moment!!
     
  14. happy-chick

    happy-chick Well-Known Member

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    I keep having sudden attacks of realisation that im gunna be a parent and be responsible for another life aswell as my own, its terrifying!! I think its a completely natural and normal thing to experience, afterall its a life changing event & things will never be the same again :D but its all good!!
     
  15. DebbieM

    DebbieM Well-Known Member

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    I'm bloody terrified about the whole caboodle! Labour, bringing baby home etc... Terrified I tell you LOL

    I think it is only natural though so I'm not worried about being scared. I even blogged about it last week :rotfl:

    http://mummy2be.wordpress.com/2008/01/0 ... -new-year/
     
  16. Full of hope!

    Full of hope! Well-Known Member

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    I'm really excited about becoming a mammy :D but when I really thing about it (usually when i'm trying to sleep at night) I suddenly panic and think omg how will we cope!

    I'm sure we all will though :hug:
     
  17. 1-week-to-go

    1-week-to-go New Member

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    ive been talking to my husband and ive told him that if i was to go into labour naturally i wouldnt be that scared but if i was to be induced then i would be terified, i know this sound weird but if i was to go naturally there is nothing i can do about it but if i had to be induced i wouldnt like it as i would be terrified on the run up to it the day before i would prob make my self into such a state the con would prob start themselves!!!!!
    lol I cant wait to mee my son though!!!

    Bayleigh due 21st jan o8 :pray:
     

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