Potty Training

[Rooster30]

I know there are a lot of posts about this. I too have been finding this exceedingly hard and very very stressful.

I've decided Saturday is the day we try again as he'll be starting a week off preschool and both of my folks are off work too so will have a helping hand with my daughter.

All attempts so far have been absolute failures. He is now 2 years 11 months and i've had enough. Previous attempts including stickers/reward charts/chocolates/you tube videos/books/toilet seats haven't worked. What I particularly can't handle are the shouts for 'I WANT MY NAPPY ONNNNN' every minute - so, so far it's not like I can just leave him bottomless and hope for the best - contending with the shouting is horrible in itself.

He knows exactly what potties/toilets are for. I tell him each time i'm going and sometimes take him with me. I announce I need to wee and ask him what I should do and he tells me to go to the toilet - but he just won't do it for myself.

I'm not expecting Saturday to go well, but with the OH around hopefully we can get through it together and take over from one another when either of us starts to get particularly frustrated.

So, how do I get my child to cope with being without his nappy?!! How to I battle through the shouting?

 

[CARNAT22]

Rooster sweetie, as you know James is the same age and we've had hell with toilet training.

Unfortunately all I can offer is the cliché of "if he isn't ready then wait".

As you know I had the deadline of nursery to work with otherwise I'd have not bothered. We started months ago and have had numerous aborted attempts as he just wasn't ready.

We're finally on our way (day 17) but it's been a long, hard slog to even get here. Currently we use the seat over toilet / no nappies indoors / I take him every 90 mins or so / a chocolate button if he tells me he needs to go.

If there is no concrete reason to go for it right now then my advice is to save yourself the stress, bother and upset. By all means give it a try - and give it a few days as we were much better on day 2 but if nothing has changed by day 4 or so then it might need a little while longer.

Toilet training has been horrific for us and we're still not fully there.

X

 

[caseysmummy11]

I attempted to potty train my son numerous times before he finally did it. He would just wee himself and cry continuously everytime we tried so i give up and left it for a few months and when I tried again he did it. I didn't do anything different from previous attempts. He just did it. I couldn't quite believe it but I think it is like carnat says it's when they're ready xxx

 

[Rooster30]

Thanks ladies. We just got back from his preschool parents evening and they don't think he's ready yet for potty training. This, I guess, is sort of reassuring. The manager there was the manager when I went to preschool - she's been in the job long enough and potty trained enough children to know when the time to start potty training is.

I've bought an all-singing all-dancing super potty, so I will try it on Saturday but if we get nowhere then I will leave it and try again at Christmas.

Admittedly, and obviously this potty training thing is my issue. I'm ashamed to say, I'm a little embarrassed when my son is the only one in mappies amongst a load of 2/3 year olds - but whatever, I guess. He's further ahead on other things at least... There aren't many adults in nappies right?!

 

[kaz1983]

we tried with Elise when she was about 2.5 and we know now she wasnt ready. We started again as she starts nursery in January so we wanted her nappyless to go there and she has been fantastic through the day for a good few weeks now so we thought we would try at night......well that was a disaster we were up through the night and had accidents which we told her were natural and not to worry

we went back to putting her in a nappy at night as as long as she is dry through the day for nursery night time we had more scope to work with. The past two mornings when hubby has got her up she has been dry even with a nappy on we stop her drinking at 8pm latest so we are going to work with this for a few weeks and see how it goes then go commando so to speak

Every child is different so don't worry about it I did and its not worth it and your little boy will get there xx

 

[Hoping for no2]

After struggling for a year with my eldest before he was trained, my advice would be leave it for a few months rather than trying to force the issue. I also felt like he 'should' be toilet trained but ultimately he just wasn't ready and it was a hellish time. I know loads of kids that weren't ready till 3. You'll get there! X

 

[Starlight1986]

My aunt is a health visitor and she recommends not toilet training until 3 so I wouldn't panic.
However my 2 year old was toilet trained at 2 Years and 3 months old and this is how I done it.

Once you commit do not back out!!!!! So obvs you want to make sure they are ready (as much as you can make sure lol), even when you think they are ready it still takes 6+ days for them to "get it" and probably a month or so for it to be nailed.

No Nappies at all except nap time and bed time, I use pull ups at night and called them bedtime pants. I never used pullups or nappies during the day, We still went out and about, she wore pants and I had an endless supply of pants and leggings in my change bag. We still went to restaurants, park, asda etc.

I used these pampers mats on her car seat and pram so something was there to catch it.

I took her to the toilet every 30 mins or so, yes it was a pain in the arse, while we sat on the toilet she done stickers, we sang songs or read a book. She maybe sat for only a couple of mins.

If she ever done anything is was massive praise and I mean over the top praise, any accidents I just said Opps, next time we will do it in the toilet.

It took us 6 days, then it just clicked, it didn't happen gradually it literally was one day she was peeing all over the place and the next day she said "I need a wee wee" and that was that's.

You will get there!! I managed to do it with a 2 month old baby and a newly installed "frosted white" carpet (don't ask)

Good Luck!! x

 

[Rooster30]

Thanks everyone. I'm leaving it for the time being. He turns 3 later this month and decided I'll wrap up the fancy potty and give it to him a week or so after his birthday and see if he takes an interest. If not, I'll carry on waiting.

 

[Orion]

Never done it myself but my mum helped with my nieces' potty training and she put knickers with a pull-up nappy on top. This way the child has an incentive to not get wet as they'll feel it, but there are no accidents in terms of your carpet etc! Just a lot of washing underwear until they get it.

Just thought I'd mention it as this way your little boy gets to wear his nappy, but maybe he'll fall out of love with it if he's feeling his accidents.

 

[Rooster30]

Thanks. I haven't heard that tip before so will try it when I'm brave enough to start potty training again.

 

[Rooster30]

I have just tried the nappy on top of pants for the first time just now. He's peed and pooped. Didn't tell me, didn't care. think i'll do it throughout tomorrow and see if he does get annoyed at being wet eventually. Not feeling hopeful though. Darn.

He's 3 next week. I really thought he'd be potty trained by now

 

[caseysmummy11]

Don't give up hope rooster he will get it. My son was never bothered with the wet feeling after an accident either and one day did just click. It's hard going potty training but it all of sudden just comes to them. Sounds daft but another idea that I heard of not sure if it's already been mentioned but pop just cheerios down the loo and try to make it game of shooting the cheerios? It might make it a fun game maybe xxx

 

[Rooster30]

I'm struggling at being persistent with it. I just had nappy off time and he would not move until I put another back on. He's currently in pants and is at least moving around. I guess he just needs to keep peeing his pants until he's able to realise that being wet isn't nice...

He'll be wet in any moment now...

 

[Rooster30]

His pants are soaked and he just doesn't care. Fifth pair of pants. No wee in potty. He doesn't care. What is wrong with my child?!! Surely he should be getting this by now.

He has preschool tomorrow and since there has been NO progress at all i'm going to have to send him in a nappy. If he had done a couple of wees or shown that he cares about being wet then i'd send him off in pants but this feels completely useless. I actually think he'll be in nappies forever. My daughter will be out of nappies before him.

 

[CARNAT22]

Been there and got to t-shirt, cup and hat!!!

In fact we're still not fully there....

What I would say is carry on tomorrow (ideally don't send him to preschool if possible). James was useless on the first day - that was the day I had a breakdown!!! Second day was a huge improvement.

They recommend to try for at least 3 days and if there is not even a slight Improvement then leave it for a few more weeks and then repeat.

It's awful, I know it is.

Sending you a big hug.

X

 

[Starlight1986]

Yup, I agree with Carnet. I would class my daughter as smart so wrongly and unfairly thought toilet training would be "easy"

It was 6 days of really hard work then as I said above, it clicked on day 6 and that's been us ever since.

I would really urge you if you can to just go with pants and that's it (except night and nap time). Its a pain in the arse and there will be lots of accidents but I think it becomes really confusing when we switch back and forth x

 

[CARNAT22]

Yep switching back and forth is very confusing for them.

I kept doing it. James would be in pants for the morning and I'd get so exasperated I'd put a pull up on and it just undid the message I'd been trying to get into him all morning.

We have a while house of cream carpets (I know!!!) so accidents were doubly stressful for me but it was only once I preserved that he seemed to get it a bit more.

X

 

[Rooster30]

Urgh! And when he goes on the potty he holds it in! Sob. This is horrible!

I'm going to plod on though and hope there will be improvement soon.

 

[Starlight1986]

Also meant to say that throughout the 6 days there wasn't much improvement, its really wasn't gradual it literally just clicked for her and I've heard a lot of people say that so I wouldn't focus too much on him being better by say the second day.

 

[Starlight1986]

Urgh! And when he goes on the potty he holds it in! Sob. This is horrible!

I'm going to plod on though and hope there will be improvement soon.

I honestly feel your pain, its such a pain in the arse toilet training!!!

I think though he isn't holding it in as he wont even know how to yet, I would get frustrated privately but I now know its such a big learning thing for them to grasp so it needs constant repetition and over praise when its done x