Positive labour preparation thread!

[i.love]

So many girls on here seem to be really nervous about giving birth. Let's try to support each other by sharing positive thoughts/tips that help us stay calm and not to panic.

I read up a bit about labour and pain. All the resources i used said that the thing that causes the woman most pain in labour is our fear. If we are scared, our muscles go all tense, which makes it more difficult for the labour to progress, and makes the process much more painful. If everything goes well and if we stay relaxed, calm and in control, there should not be much pain in labour!

My friend recently gave birth to her little daughter. She was not afraid, did not panic, and it went really well for her! She said she hardly felt any pain. Only some burning in her back, that was greatly reduced by her husband giving her massages. And she had no pain killers whatsoever.

My mum also had a painkiller free labour, and said she didn't moan or scream at all. Yes, it was painful, but she says that you forget the pain as soon as it's over.

So let's share our positive stories/thoughts here and help us all not to be afraid, and therefore feel less pain during labour!

 

[rachyryan]

The best piece of advice i have is to keep active during labour and let gravity do it's job. I was induced with both my children but the second time round was fab as it was just the gel they give you and i went naturally from there. I was encouraged to walk around and use the bed to lean over to get baby into the best position. It really worked for me and i found the pushing stage relatively easy and i think thats why. Still painful though

 

[MrsHakaxjdx]

ive got to admit when i had my first baby, i was induced, i panicked that much at 3cm i had an epidural because the pain felt unbearable. then i was confined to a bed it was awful.
My second baby was a breeze after my waters went i didnt panic at all and i just had gas and air had him and it was a great experience.

i think its all in the mind, great support is fantastic to x x x x

 

[LucyAnn]

awwwww lovely thread!!

Yes i've heard many of people say

If your scared and panic = pain
Calm relaxed = Less pain

My positive thought which is bad--- i am an anxious person in general so will hopefully be given some form of drug to calm me the hell down when it starts and help with pain

The thing that scares me is not knowing of things and experiences xxxx

 

[i.love]

awwwww lovely thread!!

Yes i've heard many of people say

If your scared and panic = pain
Calm relaxed = Less pain

My positive thought which is bad--- i am an anxious person in general so will hopefully be given some form of drug to calm me the hell down when it starts and help with pain

The thing that scares me is not knowing of things and experiences xxxx

Yep, there is always an option to have epidural and not to feel anything apparently!

 

[i.love]

ive got to admit when i had my first baby, i was induced, i panicked that much at 3cm i had an epidural because the pain felt unbearable. then i was confined to a bed it was awful.
My second baby was a breeze after my waters went i didnt panic at all and i just had gas and air had him and it was a great experience.

i think its all in the mind, great support is fantastic to x x x x

That's great, hope you have an easy labour again this time! Xx

 

[i.love]

The best piece of advice i have is to keep active during labour and let gravity do it's job. I was induced with both my children but the second time round was fab as it was just the gel they give you and i went naturally from there. I was encouraged to walk around and use the bed to lean over to get baby into the best position. It really worked for me and i found the pushing stage relatively easy and i think thats why. Still painful though

Thanks for the tip! I hope to stay active and keep moving when the things will begin to happen!

Being induced is supposed to be more painful anyway..

 

[Chookette]

My strategy so far to keep myself calm and not too worried about what is to happen is to watch every birthing show on telly I can find... This way I have seen the best and worst of any possible labour.. This way I know the worst that could be instore for me......

People think I am crazy but it seems to be helping my mindset so far..... See you I feel in a few weeks.

 

[i.love]

My strategy so far to keep myself calm and not too worried about what is to happen is to watch every birthing show on telly I can find... This way I have seen the best and worst of any possible labour.. This way I know the worst that could be instore for me......

People think I am crazy but it seems to be helping my mindset so far..... See you I feel in a few weeks.

Interesting - I am the opposite, I'm trying to stay away from bad labour stories.

Btw, our due dates are only 1 day apart

 

[Sarah13]

Great thread idea ilove! I'm staying away from any 'fear' stories and the rediculous american stuff they show on tv where these women are strapped to monitors and give an epidural straight away! I only want to hear positive things about labour now as I'm trying the Natal hypnotherapy route. I'm not scared at all, its what our bodys are designed to do. I remind myself women have given birth since the begining of time and its only recent western medicalisation of birth that has made us all scared and tense up which ends up with all the problems like you said. Women in poorer countries working in the fields, pop off for a bit when labour starts, give birth and then carry on working with the baby strapped to them! While we make such a song and dance about it? We're also the only mammals who seem to have this problem giving birth as well, yet we're supposed to be the intelligent ones!

I had an easy labour with my daugher 4 hours from my waters breaking and just used a tens machine. I was very lucky though as I did no research and didn't have a clue as I was young and before the days of the internet! I must admit I paniced a little near the end, but once the midwife calmed me down I relaxed again and all went smoothly, so I would say practice breathing and relaxation techniques, trust your body and listen to your midwife or partner so you don't freak out. I think its important for your birth partner to be educated and be strong enough to support you, I'm going to get my hubby to do some reading up once he's home again.

 

[OzGirlNat]

I'm hoping stay as calm as possible and have bought a natal hypnotherapy cd to help with this. If anyone has any tips for staying calm or regaining a sense of calm if you do start to panic, that would be fantastic. I'm not sure how successful I'll be at it once everything kicks off.

 

[Sarah13]

I think we have to stay positive all the time and not even worry or think about the negatives, I know that natal hypnotherapy says to surround yourself with positive thoughts and experiences. Even if something doesn't go to plan your better equipped to deal with it if you have been thinking positively and remaining calm.

 

[i.love]

Great thread idea ilove! I'm staying away from any 'fear' stories and the rediculous american stuff they show on tv where these women are strapped to monitors and give an epidural straight away! I only want to hear positive things about labour now as I'm trying the Natal hypnotherapy route. I'm not scared at all, its what our bodys are designed to do. I remind myself women have given birth since the begining of time and its only recent western medicalisation of birth that has made us all scared and tense up which ends up with all the problems like you said. Women in poorer countries working in the fields, pop off for a bit when labour starts, give birth and then carry on working with the baby strapped to them! While we make such a song and dance about it? We're also the only mammals who seem to have this problem giving birth as well, yet we're supposed to be the intelligent ones!

I had an easy labour with my daugher 4 hours from my waters breaking and just used a tens machine. I was very lucky though as I did no research and didn't have a clue as I was young and before the days of the internet! I must admit I paniced a little near the end, but once the midwife calmed me down I relaxed again and all went smoothly, so I would say practice breathing and relaxation techniques, trust your body and listen to your midwife or partner so you don't freak out. I think its important for your birth partner to be educated and be strong enough to support you, I'm going to get my hubby to do some reading up once he's home again.

Sarah, I totally agree! Women were successfully giving birth before without any painkillers, and they would often do it more than once, so it can't be that horrific!!

I am also very relaxed about it all so far. I even thought that maybe this is wrong that I am not scared, that I am too naive and am in for a big shock, so I read some more birth stories. But after I realised that the fear is actually the biggest problem in labour, I stopped reading all the scary stories - the last thing I want to do is to scare myself stupid! I better will be naive and brave

 

[i.love]

I'm hoping stay as calm as possible and have bought a natal hypnotherapy cd to help with this. If anyone has any tips for staying calm or regaining a sense of calm if you do start to panic, that would be fantastic. I'm not sure how successful I'll be at it once everything kicks off.

This is what my antenatal "teacher" told us:

If you start panicking, you will start breathing too fast and shallow. To get back to the 'calm' mode, you should make yourself breathe slower.

Also, when you panic your lower jaw tenses up, which, funny enough, leads to your muscles down below tensing up as well (apparently they are sort of connected). So you can try to massage your jaw to help it relax - press and massage gently right under your chin (in that a little hollow bit).

You can also rub some specific places on your hand - there is one such place in that soft bit of skin between the bases of your thumb and your forefinger. Just massage it "on both sides". Hope this makes sense lol

But do not do it just yet - apparently this place on your hand can also start your labour too early It's fine to do this after you are due or if you are not pregnant obviously

 

[Princess81]

I have really heard that relaxation and calmness is the key (though maybe easier said than done). Potter round doing things that occupy your mind during early labour and just cope with contractions as they come. I have a natal hypnotherapy cd which is very calming and i have also downloaded some meditation tracks to chill me out during labour. I also want to try to spen as long as i can at home with my home comforts and familiar surroundings (and my own bath lol). - Sorry for jumping in from tri 2 by the way, but I love labour prep threads so couldn't keep away x

 

[Bella2]

thanks for this thread ilove, it's really helping me to hear about the different ways of keeping calm, particulary as I can be quite an anxious person! What I've been doing up until this point is trying the whole ignorance is bliss route but you can't do that forever lol! Have made a point of not watching any of the amercian one born every minute episodes as someone told the women on there are so OTT. Going to start reading up on hypnobirthing this weekend x x

 

[Mummy2Adam]

I think relaxation and breathing is the key, having a good birthing partner is also an important part.
Watching birthing programmes even the ones that didnt go to plan made me prepared for any thing that was thrown at me.
Even though they tell you to write a birthing plan the thought of having things set down would stress me out if they didnt go to plan so this time im doing the same me with an open mind and my OH the only change is my hypnobirthing cd to see if i can do it with no gas and air this time x x

 

[roxane 1985]

well hopefully this time will be easier, i freaked out so much last time as i was in alot of pain but the midwives erent around and the twatty father at the time wouldnt go and get them, had no words of encouragement or anything.

thankfully ive a new partner who is very supportive so i know i can count onhim

 

[Menie13]

Yeah wasn't too stress before this week, not sure why it's happening now.. Maybe I start to realise than the labour is not far away and even If I do want to stay calm, relax and positive, there is a little part of me thinking to the pain caused by the labour.. But yes I do agree, staying calm, focusing on something else than the pain (ie listening music, relaxing on the birth ball etc..) is the best way!!!
Just need to educate myself to stay calm whatever happen

 

[i.love]

Hi girls

I went to another antenatal class yesterday, and our teacher told us about another thing you can do to keep calm, so I thought I should share it with you.

You should make sure that your shoulders are soft and down (not going all tense and lift up to your ears), and that you do not make fists. This is what we do in stress, and avoiding this position helps you to feel relaxed.