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[CARNAT22]

My hospital were incredibly strict about c-sections and there is no way on Earth I would have been able to opt for one unless there was an incredibly serious medical / emotional reason.

My hospital actually offer private sections so I am not sure if this is the reason they are so strict ??

Anyhoo, as other ladies have said everyone is afraid of labour but most of us just have to get on with it.

I found Maggie Howell's Natal Hypnotherapy (the book in particular) really helped me stay calm in the lead up to labour. In fact I was looking forward to labour.

I didn't use the actual techniques on the day but it helped me remain chilled out about it all.

I ended up having a 50 hour labour shock but delivered baby naturally without so much as a graze... the MW's were quite impressed.

I'd do it again in a heartbeat, in-fact I hope one day I am able to do it again.

Speak with your MW, attend some antenatal classes and do some research / reading about Natal hypnotherapy and relaxation techniques

X

 

[Hope81]

Ah i completely understand being terrified of a natural birth. It is scary isn't it? After all we hear so many things about it and mostly shocking bad things. How much it hurts, cuts etc.
I was terrified too :/ second time around I still am as I know how hard it's going to be.
I will break down my own experience to see if that would help you.
Contractions up to 4 cm are more than manageable. It hurts a lot but nth we can't handle. Like a really bad period pain but more manageable than that as it comes builds up in intensity and then slowly gets better and disappears all in 30-40 sec then you get a brake with no pain at all.
After that you are able to get an epidural If you want. I did and it was a good decision. Well I had to have it as a precaution because I was delivering a big baby but I appreciated very very much.
While you have the epidural (which hurts a little to put in but nth unmanageable) you can feel the contractions like a sensation, you bump is getting hard but you feel no pain.
If you choose to have no epidural contractions up to 7 cm are painful but manageable after 7 cm the harder part comes and then you just have to go with the flow. Remember you do hVe other options like gas and air and oral pain relief.
My epidural stopped working at 10 cm(not sth that's likely to happen they messed a bit with it) 10 cm dilated contractions were awful painful BUT nth I couldn't handle. They cone and go you get a short brake and then the pushing stage comes.
Pushing usually feels good. It's like pushing the pain away. It's hard physically hard work but not nearly as painful as the 7-10 cm contractions. It's intense very intense but you have a job to do. Ofc if you have an epidural things are different you feel the contractions you push but no pain or minimal pain if you choose to lower the epidural a bit so you can more efficiently push.
The moment that baby comes is very painful but a different sensation than before. It's a very intense pressure and maybe a burning sensation but it's over before you get too consumed by it. Once the head is delivered you are practically done. The pain disappears almost immediately and soon you have a baby in your arms.
The tears, cuts and grazes usually come when the shoulders pass so when the midwife says stop pushing (after the head is delivered) you just freeze and do nth else than waiting the shoulders to come out by themselves.
As I told you I was delivering a big baby not that huge weigh wise but very tall with broad shoulders and big head.
I got 2 degree cuts from the shoulders getting delivered (I felt nth) and needed forceps for the head delivery.
Stitching didn't hurt at all (local anesthetic)
1 h later I was up and walking.
I had bruise like pain on my foofoo for about 2 weeks but only the first 3-4 days were actually painful and even then nth to be compared of how painful and uncomfortable the last weeks of pregnancy were. Very manageable with simple pain relief for the first week.
I was at the supermarket shopping second day and at a fairy next week.
My bleeding was on and off for 3-4 weeks quite a lot the first week then it slowed down to a similar to a period flow for one more week then it was just now and then for one more week and then it disappeared.
The first 6-8 weeks I could feel air gushing out of my foofoo every time I was moving around or sitting that slowly got better and disappeared as the vagina was tightening.
We had sex at 8 weeks if I recall which didn't feel quite ok as I was too tight....
Everything did go completely back to normal and then more...I got kind of incontinence the first couple of weeks which is absolutely normal and disappeared quickly with no problems now. I just had to regularly go for a pee the early days to make sure I don't get a too full of a bladder. I got no piles though the doctor said I got a couple but never bothered me.
I never had pain while going for a number one or two. All in one it was a great great quick recovery with no problems at all and it was even an assisted with forceps delivery.
Fast forward 1.5 years and I am expecting twins now. I so hope I can have a natural delivery again even if that will be a breech delivery instead of a c section.
C section means 7-8 weeks with no lifting anything more than my baby and I have a toddler around. It means a life long scar which can hurt and ache very often, it means I can't drive for 6 weeks, cook for 3 weeks I could go on and on. If I can have a natural delivery then yes please if I can't then that's it but I could take 12 h of relative pain instead of weeks of scar pain lol and all added physical limitations. Remember I told you I am still terrified of labor? Ofc I am it's painful. I will not even go to tell you that the result of it changes it all and you soon forget it.
I will tell you just that if you are afraid of the pain epidurals are a blessing no reason Togo through the pain part if you don't want to. If the recovery is the one worrying you then that's absolutely nth compared to the recovery of a c section.
As about the situation of your lady bits it may take some time but everything will go back to normal xx
Good luck with it all. Be open minded and it will be a success story I am sure of it.

 

[LaurenB47]

Thanks xx

 

[leesey]

How do you feel about it now Lauren? I'm really hoping for a natural delivery as I had a c-section with my first and like hope I don't want to go through the pain and discomfort of major surgery when I have a toddler to look after too.

Why don't you try something like a hypnotherapy cd or hypo-birthing class? I do Lazy Daisy and I love it, makes you feel so positive about giving birth.

Does your husband support your wish to possibly have a section? He would have to step it up with the housework etc as you won't very able to do any of that for weeks after giving birth via cs.

Although you've said in another post that you are single and live alone, this makes it even more important to make sure you have support!

Hope you're feeling better about it xx

 

[Gayle30]

Just a quick message to say I had the most wonderful elective csection! I was up and out of bed within 12 hours caring for my baby. Stayed in hospital 3 nights and on day 5 I went out on a shopping trip. Day 7 I walked approx 50 minutes then took a bus to see my family and back. I walked for miles each day pushing the pram. Very little pain after the csection and no problems with the wound.

If it is something you decide on then dont listen to what some say-its not all a horror story. I was positively glowing afterwards and would rather that than a natural birth any day of the week.

Good luck with what ever you decide on. Its not going to be easy which ever you pick. Xx

 

[BunnyN]

Are you in UK? NHS polocy and NICE guidlines say any woman can choose an elective CS. You may be required to have councining to make sure you understand the increased risks involved for you and the baby but if you still want one you have that right. Personally I had a natural birth and loved it despite being 38hrs it was one of the best experiences of my life and I can't wait to do it again.

 

[lizzie1978]

hi hun,

Im currebtly on 2nd pregnancy and with 1st i was petrified like you over the birth. Those fears go away when your in labour. I ended up with complications after being induced then a csection. I wish i hadnt had to have a section. Not only do i not remember musch about the 1st 24hrs but i had to call for the midwife to pass me my baby, my wound started seeping after 3 days and ended up in a&e and i have ended up with and apron effect on my tummy which must be why celebs get the tuck after.

Not all sections have complications but recovery, being unable to drive or lift anything heavier than your baby then your 2nd birth if you decide on a 2nd becomes more complicated. I would opt for natural birth. The nct do courses or ask your midwife if you could have an appt with a midwife at the hospital and take a list of questions.

Ultimately its up to you but knowing what i know now a natural birth would have been amazing to me