Pissed off with OH

[pinkyprincess]

For those that don't know, we've recently been given the opportunity to move up a housing 'band' so that we can move out of our tiny (unsutible for baby) studio and bid on bigger houses that we would like to move in to.

OH only gone and bidded on some 1 bedroom houses and flats which I think is silly because if we are offered it we HAVE to take it!

Weve got 5 months until the babys born and OH is rushing into trying to get a 1 bed place that we'll only have to move out of again when baby is 6-12 months old (as we will be classed as overcrowded) instead of waiting a little while now (while we don't need to extra space) for a place with 2 bedrooms that we can settle in and not have to move out of!!!

Moving in stressfull enough let alone having to do it with a little baby. The one bed place we might get has a high chance of not being hugely liveable in being council owned (and judging by what our flat was like when we moved in) so whats the point of doing it up, only to be moved again and have to do up a new place!

I don't think he's being very sensible at all and although we spent all weekend at home alone together who chooses when i'm out to bid on places where we will both be living together, leaving me with no choice in the matter.

 

[Piglet10]

i wud kick his ass, im pretty sure if u ring and retrabt ur bids before theyre acceptedthis wud be feasible , just say it was an error xxx

 

[Danti]

I would be fuming! I haven't got much in the way of advice but big and fingers crossed you can do what Piglet has suggested. xx

 

[Princess81]

It sounds like he's not thought it through at all why are men so dense sometimes??

 

[Dee83]

Yeah, i would be majorly pissed off too hun!! I would do what piglet said and try to retract the bids - or better still ask him to do it! xxx

 

[ChrissieCool]

Can you cancel the bid? I could when I was bidding on places and to be honest you really need to bid on a 2 bedroom place now while you can coz if you move you will be put back to the bottom of the list and might have to wait years!! that's how it worked for me anyway, whole thing was a nightmare and I had to wait years to even get to the bidding part so you don't want to mess it up trust me, best of luck xxxx

 

[pinkyprincess]

Weve got lucky Chrissie, our place is so small, when the council didn't do anything we got the local MP involved which is the only reason we can bid now!

I'm going to talk to him when I get home and try and get him to retract them if he can! I don't know what i'm more angry about, him bidding on places without me seeing them or the fact they are 1 bedroom places!

It's bad enough that when we do get viewings, most likely I wont be able to go as I work Mon - Fri 9-4.30 for a cow, but at his work they are more flexible so will give him time off to view so i'm going to have to rely on his judgement!!

 

[ChrissieCool]

Really hope it goes well in the end, I'm sure it will xxxx

 

[pinkyprincess]

He's now saying that after everything the council apparently won't give u's a 2 bed place so we have to move into a one bed till baby's a year old then apply to move again! Where is the common sense in that?

 

[Dee83]

Oh no, really hun that's crap!! I suppose they are keeping the 2beds for those who need it now rather than later it's totally ridiculous! At least you're able to move out of the studio tho chick. It will all work out in the end. xxx

 

[pinkyprincess]

Yeah just stressing me out in the process!! Xx

 

[littlemiss83]

What a carry on!!

Most councils are the same, they dont class a baby officially as a baby untill they see the birth cert. Same with tax credits/benefits ect.

Hope you get something sorted soon, sounds like you'd be better off where you are just now. It is a hassle to move with a baby, but maybe not quite as bad when baby is 7/8 months old for example!

 

[1986princess]

Is be as angry as u are hun, as he hasn't thought what might be eat for you and baby now. I'm sure he didn't
Intentionally try to be insensitive but have noticed my other half rushes into silly decisions also! Must be a man thing! Plus the set up is annoying If u are offered the house u have to take it? Ur other half is in for a hard time from u if that's the case! Hope it works out for u in the best way possible
Hun x

 

[NinjaKitty]

Is the bidding done via internet? If so change the password on your PC so he can't bid on any more without your consent. Failing that whack his fingers with a ruler if he does it again.

I hope you can get some of the bids retracted like some of the other ladies have suggested.

 

[Dragonfly Fi]

moving into another house thats too small will just take any strength away from your overcrowding argument, they will just say you 'chose' to be there and make you stay there for ages.

I dunno why he doesnt see that but i suggest you make it really really clear to him because he will be getting it in the neck for years when you have a 2/3 year old sharing a bedroom with you. We are currently sharing a bedroom with our one year old and to be honest its a total nightmare. He will soon change his tune when he realises sex is off the cards because it will wake the baby up, and reading in bed, and getting up in the morning is a total hassle.

Goodluck, men cant see past the end of their noses sometimes.

 

[Jayceesmumma]

Defo try and hold out for a two bedroom if you can, youll never get out of a one bedroom.. ive known people with 3 kids in a 1bedroom flat.. they just tell you to use living room as ur bedroom and the bedroom as the babys room..

im sure he meant no harm in it and is just worried... try and talk about it with him and get him to understand the position youll be getting yourselves into in a 1bed place..

I hope all works out in the end.. try and cancel the bids and change your password.

I know how it feels, i was in a hostel for 15months with Jaycee and it was awful we were classed as a band D for months until i pushed and pushed them.. they even sat there and said you need to live in a hostel with shared bathroom/kitchen/livingroom etc to be a band B and i bloody well was!! the other girls in there were band Bs and i was a D for about 8 months finally they changed it and i got my 2 bedroom house 3 days before her 1st birthday crappy area for 2yrs but with the help of homeswapper im in a fantastic location and a nice 2 bed house that didnt need any work.. the last house had no floor.. just concrete with rubble.. and that was its best feature!

youll get there in the end i promise!

 

[Lulabell]

My hubby and I are currently renting a 1 bed flat. It's a little stressing as I keep thinking about space and the lack of. But at the end of the day, baby will be in our room for the first few months. So will look to move after that. Although it does suck, surely anything is better then a studio? You might be lucky and get a place with loads of space? Fingers crossed for you hun. Try not to worry too much. Easier said then done though I guess.xx

 

[Dragonfly Fi]

I also know of families of 4 or 5 in 1 bedroomed council houses. We are in a single room of a shared house all 3 of us and they only considered that 'silver' banding (3rd down) we only got upgraded because we have an eviction order. If you move into a 1 bed place you just wont ever get out of it. here 'seriously overcrowded' means needing 2 or more extra bedrooms, they reckon kiddies can share until they are 8 so even if you have another kid straight away, you wont be in that band for 8 years!

I think you can cancel your bids. have a look because i can reject mine anytime x

 

[pinkyprincess]

Thanks everyone

Jayceesmumma - you live not to far from us we are West Drayton. We were in band D, but since we got our local MP involved we've been moved up to band C. OH says that becuase the baby is not yet here (ie a body) we cannot even apply for a 2 bed place (or apply) although they know our situation and the urgancy has been echoed by the MP. Is this how it works from your experiance? Surely it's better for the council to get us housed once and for all, not in a 1 bed which would obviously be temp, only to have to move us again due to overcrowding??

He's also saying that people downsize from bigger places into a 1 bed (not a studio) so if we move into a 1 bed, we could possibly swap into bigger to speed it along. Is that worthwhile do you think??

 

[pinkyprincess]

Excuse the crappy spelling and punctuation - finish work in 5 mins so need to pack everything up lol