Hello, ladies, I am new here I don't really know why I registered, but I've been feeing the need to vent, since my situation is nothing like my friends have experienced, so none of them can really relate to me at the moment. The hubby and I have been together for 8 years and got married just 4 months ago, we are both 28 years old. I have always been terrified of getting pregnant, so we were always extremely cautious with protection, I was on the pill up till last year, after that we switched to condoms and just after the wedding decided to use the pull out method.
I had a minor pregnancy scare 2 months ago, which flipped some kind of switch in my head and suddenly I realized the timing may be right. So I went from one extreme to another. It came as a shock to my husband who said that it is still too early for him and he would be needing another year or two before we can TTC. He believes he could be doing better at his job if we wait a little longer, or so he tells me. I honestly think he is using this as an excuse because he is scared and I really shocked him with my change of heart. We always knew we weren't going to TTC right after the wedding, and I did beieve this... but now I am confused
I have no idea how I feel at the moment. I find myself secretly hoping that some kind of miracle would happen and I would accidentally get pregnant, so we won't have to go through all the decision-making and planning and honestly, I'd hate to face another rejection from him. When I confronted him about it and said that if he truly fears it so much, I probably should get back on the pill, because this is slightly riskier, he said it's ok and he has taken the risk into account. So he is NOT that terrified, but he'd rather just wait and see what happens.
I always thought when the time is right we would be on the same page, so now I am really confused and I don't know how I feel about this. "Alone" is one word for it. "In limbo" is another. He wants children, he believe we would be good parents, we have ticked all the boxes - decent income, big appartment, good jobs, age is good, timing seems right, yet... he is not ready. None of my close friends have experienced anything like this, most of them are at earlier stages of their relationships so they can't really relate to the problem. There is this one friend who got married last month and is now 6 weeks pregnant. She keeps talking about "her baby" and all the things she's going through with the pregnancy and it makes me feel hurt and jealous... I am happy for her but I do feel she could be a bit more considerate. After all she knows what I am going through. She was just so happy her husband was the one who suggested TTC and it feels sometimes like she's rubbing it in my face. I am so sorry for the long post, but I really needed to share with someone impartial. I can only hope I am not the only person in the world with such a "problem". It would really help to get some support from people who have gone through the same...
I had a minor pregnancy scare 2 months ago, which flipped some kind of switch in my head and suddenly I realized the timing may be right. So I went from one extreme to another. It came as a shock to my husband who said that it is still too early for him and he would be needing another year or two before we can TTC. He believes he could be doing better at his job if we wait a little longer, or so he tells me. I honestly think he is using this as an excuse because he is scared and I really shocked him with my change of heart. We always knew we weren't going to TTC right after the wedding, and I did beieve this... but now I am confused
I have no idea how I feel at the moment. I find myself secretly hoping that some kind of miracle would happen and I would accidentally get pregnant, so we won't have to go through all the decision-making and planning and honestly, I'd hate to face another rejection from him. When I confronted him about it and said that if he truly fears it so much, I probably should get back on the pill, because this is slightly riskier, he said it's ok and he has taken the risk into account. So he is NOT that terrified, but he'd rather just wait and see what happens.
I always thought when the time is right we would be on the same page, so now I am really confused and I don't know how I feel about this. "Alone" is one word for it. "In limbo" is another. He wants children, he believe we would be good parents, we have ticked all the boxes - decent income, big appartment, good jobs, age is good, timing seems right, yet... he is not ready. None of my close friends have experienced anything like this, most of them are at earlier stages of their relationships so they can't really relate to the problem. There is this one friend who got married last month and is now 6 weeks pregnant. She keeps talking about "her baby" and all the things she's going through with the pregnancy and it makes me feel hurt and jealous... I am happy for her but I do feel she could be a bit more considerate. After all she knows what I am going through. She was just so happy her husband was the one who suggested TTC and it feels sometimes like she's rubbing it in my face. I am so sorry for the long post, but I really needed to share with someone impartial. I can only hope I am not the only person in the world with such a "problem". It would really help to get some support from people who have gone through the same...
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