No Sex Throughout Whole Pregnancy!!

[Julia]

Hi Girls,

I do not really want sex at all BUT my DH has admitted that he will not have sex with me even if I wanted to!! It obviously terrifies him!! He is not being insensitive about my weight gain (he says he thinks my stomach is the only part of me that has gained weight - I know this is not true because I can now see it in my arms, legs, bum and face).

He says that my boobs are "fab!" but he will not come near me. He said that all he can think about is the fact that a baby is at the top of my vagina and it really freaks him out!!

I don't really mind to be honest because I have not been in the mood for sex at all and it also freaks me out abit - I feel very delicate and don't really want anyone near me!!

Does anyone else's DH feel the same? 9 months is a LLLLOOOOONNNNNGGGGGGG time without passion!!!

Julia xxxxxxx

 

[Steelgoddess]

Yes mine isn't having a bar of it... at the most he MIGHT allow me to give him ahem, a bj but he worries baby will be able to see "it" or it might poke the little guy...

I don't know you can't wi with these men, when we're not preg they want it all the time and when we are they run off... I dont know... Can't get the staff these days!!

x

 

[chezzabell]

god wish my oh didnt want it

he is obsessed with sex

 

[spacehopper]

Im the same as chezzabell, mine always wants it. He says it doesnt worry him as he knows that baby is protected.

Me on the other hand i dont, it hurts and its uncomfy lol

 

[nickilubs]

We still do but its more of a closeness thing I really miss being that close to OH you can cuddle but its not the same. Its very very very rare though because now tummy makes it awkward and sometimes I find it gets to a point where it hurts which aint good! But I cant wait to be able to jump him again hehe I miss being able to do that!

 

[Neev]

In our relationship it is ME who does not want it ...

I just find it strange - not that it is strange but to me I would rather wait this period out....but we do still have the closeness and everythign else minus the intercourse...

DH is also happy waiting till LO is with us...its just something we dont think of anymore...so yes almost 9 months since we have done it as well. Initially it was a fear of - lets not do it for the first 3 months incase something goes wrong..I know it would not have but we were just petrified after the 1st miscarriage.... then it just became one of those understood situations..NONE till after

 

[millylillyrose]

i'd love it if OH didnt want any! lol! he's very good about it but i feel horrible if i turn him down. and so much of the time, i just dont feel like it at ALL!

we're trying to be a little more regular at the moment though to get the baby out, hahah (sorry tmi)

 

[dannii87]

I can SOOOO understand a guy's way of thinking of it!! I think I'd feel similar too! A) I've never had a very high sex drive anyway, I've coped brilliantly without it since Gray left! (I might be gagging for it afterwards, but it's tough titty as I have no fella!)

I guess my way of thinking would be that as baby is in my tummy, I should be protecting her and making sure no harm comes her way I know it's not even logical because babies can't see it or understand what's going on, but it would be MY psychology if that makes sense?!

x

 

[Julia]

I really appreciate your replies, girls!

Even though I don't want it, i still want him to want me (if you know what I mean). He just keeps me at arms length saying that pregnancy and sex freaks him out! I spoke to my midwife who said it is very very common and just as men must respect women for not wanting sex, women must also respect men for not wanting it (and yes, I do).

I had a miscarriage with my very first pregnancy a few years ago and I think I am so protective over my baby because of that (this is my third pregnancy - no problems with second or this one, thank goodness).

Julia xx

 

[*pud01*]

peter was okay at first he 'read up' about it and that it causes no harm to the baby and the baby cant see it or feel it etc etc in fact he took great pride in explaining it to me... the only time not to have sex is if the doctor or m/w advises you not to. so we was still...
the only times we had problems in the bedroom dept is when i was having horrible bleeds between when i was 12-16 weeks and im not talking spotting, and now everything hurts too much i have to mentally prepare myself when i stand up, sit down, even blink ... for the pain to come so sex isnt exactly top of my list of things to do atm peter on the other hand

 

[Lindsay]

Julia, I was PG with you last time around and remember your posts about no sex from then! My DH is the same (I think I mentioned this last time too!) He says exactly the same as what your DH says, that it doesn't feel right knowing that there is a baby inside!! LAst night he did say, that if we get to next week and baby isn't out we could give it a go - 9 months too late though, lol!!

Xxx

 

[JoAnn&Aimee]

Ewan and I didn't have sex during my pregnancy until a week before my due date but that was only because I was desperate to get her out! It was mostly my sex drive though. It just went! It has come back full force now though!

 

[Julia]

Thanks for your replies, girls!

Hi Lindsay - can't believe you remember my complaint from before!!! I must have moaned like mad about it!!
There is nothing I can do about it - the more I moan, the more it upsets him!! The stupid thing is that my sex drive has gone anyway!! Thanks for your post....

Julia xxxx

 

[katrina1985]

I know how you lot feel - me and my man havent had sex either since the end of december 2007 - i am getting really really fustrated.
He has an over active imagination, so is worried he will hurt me or LO. Its a pain though as i am horny as hell and i am sure it would have been the best sex ever a few months ago as was so sensitive. I cant really be bothered with it now as so tired and my back always hurts.
I just hope that once LO is here he will want to do it again!!!!

 

[hennaly]

Omg there is no way on this earth either of us could go that long, i think i managed a week off the other week as i felt shit and im finding it a bit harder to get into a comfotable position but still manage it somehow.

 

[AliCat]

We're still having sex, sometimes I feel like it, and sometimes I don't. The fact that we haven't had sex that much during this pregnancy is more to do with Dave's awkward working hours (shifts, nights and weekends). I'm off on annual leave all week next week and we're going down to the Midlands to see families, so might have more time then to have some passion!

 

[elliej]

we still do it, although just lately its getting so unconfortable, but there are other ways of having sex.... lol, saying that though, if i dont feel like it DH is great and fairly understanding, which is quite unusual as he has a mega sex drive and i dont! lol. but then everyones different.

 

[Red_Fairy]

we carried on like normal (possibly even more sex!)
I even had sex the night before i went into labour with both my girls!

 

[bunnymom1980]

I haven't really wanted to throughout this pregnancy and neither has my husband, he feels weird about it.

 

[Hazel]

DH and I didn't at all throughout entire pregnancy. Not because niether of us didn't want it but on doctors orders for first 16 weeks then I could feel her kick and it was just to weird. Did say we would if went overdue but didn't get that far.