Need advice with husband

[preggersmama]

hi all, I’m new to this forum but in need of advice. I feel like my husband isn’t being supportive and I’m not sure if I’m blowing this out of proportion.

This am after my shower I freaked out because I had blood when I toweled off (I’m 2 months). I woke up my husband because I was freaking out but he had me wipe and I didn’t have anything more. I was upset and crying (hormones and all!), and he started telling me I was being crazy and a lunatic being so upset. Then he said I might as well tell everyone I’m pregnant because it seems like I’ll have a breakdown, then he went back to bed.

I’m SO upset when all I wanted was to be comforted. Am I blowing this out of proportion? I fear this is a sign of the lack of support I’ll receive...

Thanks,
Upset mama trying to stay strong for her baby

 

[Jellybean86]

I'm sorry that he wasn't showing more concern after you had bleeding. Have u had anymore since then or has it stopped? Also was it fresh looking or old blood?

Thing is the pregnancy journey is a long and testing one. Your hormones are up and down and your partner is also getting their head round the fact that you are both having a baby.

Try to talk to him again about the bleeding and why you were so upset and concerned but also make sure it diesnt end up blowing up into a big row as that is no good for you either

 

[Kitana]

I'm sorry you have to go through this.
When I read your post, it made me think on how my oh would react. He can get extremely grumpy when woken up and say things he wouldn't mean. Have you talked to him since? Maybe he also feels bad for reacting that way but hasn't found a way to tell you. Men can be stubborn and only address the issue when the partner does. Don't make his reaction seem like a big deal, just try to tell him that you were worried and that you wanted to let him know, just that it came out in a bad way since you were in a panic. Make him understand that it's happening to your body and your embryo amd that makes it even scarier.
Was it bright red or "old" blood?
Hope you get to talk to him.x

 

[preggersmama]

Thanks ladies, helps to have this sounding board. It was old looking blood, dull (not bright) and my DH thinks it may have even been from him having a slight nose bleed the other day. So I think that part is ok, but it was still scary and the reaction.

Yes this is all good advice. He did call and slightly apologized when I explained where I was coming from but there was also a lot of “me needing to handle things better” coming from him.

 

[Kitana]

Thanks ladies, helps to have this sounding board. It was old looking blood, dull (not bright) and my DH thinks it may have even been from him having a slight nose bleed the other day. So I think that part is ok, but it was still scary and the reaction.

Yes this is all good advice. He did call and slightly apologized when I explained where I was coming from but there was also a lot of “me needing to handle things better” coming from him.

I'm happy to hear you were able to talk to him. Men don't respond well to things they can't control and maybe it frightened him too but wasn't able to express it like he wanted too.
The pregnancy journey is a rollercoaster though, so hang on! It isn't easy for us, and it's hard for the men to understand.
My oh wasn't very kind or helpful during the pregnancy so I moaned loads on the forum! These lovely ladies here will always try to find a way to make you feel better!x

 

[Jellybean86]

Thanks ladies, helps to have this sounding board. It was old looking blood, dull (not bright) and my DH thinks it may have even been from him having a slight nose bleed the other day. So I think that part is ok, but it was still scary and the reaction.

Yes this is all good advice. He did call and slightly apologized when I explained where I was coming from but there was also a lot of “me needing to handle things better” coming from him.

Well old blood is better and if you haven't had any since then better still.

I had a mc last year and I was a nervous wreck when i got pregnant a couple months later. I knew I would be. I ask my close friends and family stupid questions that I know the answers to but I just want reassurance. It's a difficult time for all involved during pregnancy and emotions are all over the place

 

[preggersmama]

Amazing, thank you lovely ladies! I’m already feeling the power and comfort of this forum!!

 

[Aprilxxx]

Sorry your OH related like that.
I think men don’t understand pregnancy or really connect with it until they see the baby on the screen. My bf is a great support as we have had two mc and he knows I know my own body well if I’m freaking out it’s called for but that being said he couldn’t get his head around all the mad pg symptoms (he thought I was being dramatic). Then he saw baby a few times and realised how fast it grows and it’s all clicked in his head how much of a bid deal making a baby is.

I wonder if by him telling you to deal better he isn’t meaning it nastily but maybe that it’s going to be a long 9 months if you worrying about everything?
Does he know what the first 12 weeks are the highest risk? Because most women would freak out if they had blood like you to!

Xx