Just wanting to be left alone after the birth..

Discussion in 'Postnatal Questions' started by nickilubs, Oct 20, 2008.

  1. nickilubs

    nickilubs Well-Known Member

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    :( Im getting really bored of this now. I am fine or I would be if the HVs and Doctors would just leave me alone.

    Now the most important person to me is Ivy she comes first in everything so I will take her to be weighed and have her check ups and everything that is necessary to her so no problems there....... But I just want them to bugger off and leave me alone now, I'm fed up of taking Pills, I'm fed up of getting told expressing my milk is bad (if I just said I was formula feeding they would leave me alone, if I was breast feeding they would leave me alone but because I express they keep pushing everything else!), I'm fed up of being poked and prodded and stabbed with needles.

    And I ask what the pills are for eg-Iron and the only explanation is "oh your iron levels were low at the hospital and you look pale" (bare in mind when I left hospital they took me off Iron because the bloods showed I didn't need it...the midwife who I have never met before decided to due to the fact I'm not the colour of David Dickinson that I must be anemic and I looked too pale to be healthy!) I think I am fine I know my normal colour and if the only explanation is "because you need Iron" and not the reason WHAT I need it for then I don't know what the need is for it I want to know what having low iron will do....is it gonna kill me???!??

    I feel absolutely 100% brilliant since the birth till now and now that I actually have a problem I really don't want to go and see them because Ive had enough of all of it. I know it wont be a simple tell them the problem they do what they need to to sort it and I go home and get better it will be a whole load of other questions and more poking and more blood taken and urine samples. I am a perfectly healthy 21 year old just because I look like death all the time doesn't make me ill! My Dad is ginger and fair so I got his skin and my Mum is Olive skinned and has extreamly dark hair and eyes put that together and you get a pasty skinned child with dark features. It DOES NOT mean I'm ill. Also just because I'm not spilling out a whole load of problems and I am enjoying being a mum DOES NOT mean that I am hiding something and that I'm deeply unhappy but not telling anyone. I'm a quiet and happy person(most of the time) just because I'm not outgoing or walking around with a grumpy head it doesn't mean I'm not telling them something. (I smile too much!!!!!! So must be because theres something wrong and I'm hiding behind a smile?!?)

    When does all this end? I was kind of hopeing it would all be over soon as I left the hospital but it just seems to be going on and on now.

    Sorry I'm just grouchy about all this now :hug:
     
  2. Hazel

    Hazel Well-Known Member

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    Tell them this. I'm sure they think every new mum is sobbing into her cornflakes every morning :roll: . You don't have to take what they are prescribing you and you don't have to attend appointments if you don't want to. If you do have a concern over something go and see them though and don't let this put you off. :hug:

    The HV got me to fill out a questionnaire about my moods and when I gave it back she said "you scored 100%" with a suspicious look on her face that I was lying. I honestly feel fine, don't look for a problem where there isn't one. :wall:
     
  3. nori

    nori Well-Known Member

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    Sorry you are feeling like this.. i was anaemic for ages before they would give me iron (a whole other story) but its not wise to leabe it IF you are anaemic. They really cant tell your haemoglobin levels through skin colour alone.. its winter for goodness sake.. who has a tan?!!

    Id have one last blood test to find out and then tell them to leave you alone if all is ok!

    Claire x
     
  4. trixipaws

    trixipaws Well-Known Member

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    grr i kno how u feel! i am often told i look ill coz i have dark eyes and olive skin- which if i am tanned i look turkish or something lol but if im not tanned then i look very porcelain almost yellow!

    and i get sick of people saying melissa looks tired- because she has inherited my eyelids- we both have very visible eyelids when our eyes are open fully so they look like they are half-closed!

    dont take iron if u dont need it- its bad for you too much! :hug:
     
  5. flowergirl

    flowergirl Well-Known Member

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    I'm so pale that I look grey but my iron levels are through the roof! Even when I was in the last week of pregnancy my iron levels were at 15 (sorry, can't remember the units!) which is better than my OH!

    If you are fine and coping well then there is no reason for the docs and HV to be involved. Ask for a blood test to show that oyu no longer need the iron supplements and explainhat oyu are finding the contact intrusive and stressful. They get to see you and your baby at the regular developmental checks so there shouldn;t be a problem.

    My HV was suspicious of me as she spoke to my OH first and he boldly proclaimed the I didn't have PND (quite right) but because he'd been so direct, she thought he was hiding something! She only stopped asking the pointed questions when I'd filled out the questionnaire and the score proved I was OK.
     

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