is it possible

[weestar21]

for a man to suffer from PND?
im really starting to think my OH is really suffering terribly from either depression or PND Things have been really tough on us both this whole year so far, its just been one thing after another. Going bankrupt having a baby,his dad having a stroke, his gran being diagnosed with parkinsons disease, us being evicted, him losing his job, starting a new job that he hates. My car being fucked (wheel baring being jammed on and OH hit the rear wheel arch with a hammer so now has a lovely big dent in it too)
He sold his car on ebay the other nite and pick up had 2 be made within 2 days of auction ending, a guy bought it now and said he was in edinburgh today (sunday) and would try get over to get the car if not it was going to be thursday. My OH has been trying to call the guy since last night and left a few messages but no reply now he thinks the guy has changed his mind and just not wanting to tell us. Whats worse is OH was bidding on another car and won but because we dont have the money from his car we cant get the one he has wone Everything is a mess were hardly speaking at all, all he does is cries. He phoned in work on thursday and told them he hurt his back and has been off since then, now hes been looking for a new job and says hes not going to work tomoz wich prob means he wont go back. We have booked a van for saturday for us moving but if he doesnt go to work this week we will haveno money at all to pay for it. I just cant get through to him

Hes spent most of the past 3 days in bed and keeps saying he wishes someone would shoot him.

I dont know what to do about him, im really stressed out and i guess i have had PND slightly but im trying my best to keep it together but just feel im fighting a losing battle.

Should i ring the doctors tomoz if he doesnt go to work, he has only been in this new job 3 weeks
i just dont know what to do anymore

if anyone has any suggestions what i could do it would be very greatfull

sorry about my long rant got no where else to turn too

xxxx

 

[Hypnorm]

launch an unpaid item dispute with ebay, see what happens, you can search for his contact and adress details on ebay as you have had a trasaction with him, i cant remeber where though.
He will end up with an unpaid item strike if he doesn respond and dont fall for the i've been ill crap!

Sorry to hear things are stressed, i wish i could offer some other adice to you

 

[sam96031]

yeah i think it is poss for them to suffer it 2 might be an idea for him to talk to someone download some info on the other half suffering it and then he wont feel so lost?

 

[oldermum]

Yes,launch an unpaid item dispute with ebay, if it is over the 2 days you stated, offer the car to the next highest bidder if there was one.

Can you not apply for some sort of Crisis/hardship Grant ?

If he would go i'd try to get your OH to the Doctors or councilling.

Sorry to hear you have so much going on.

 

[weestar21]

ok guy just sent a message saying he will be here on wednesday now for the car wich means OH will have to get the newish one on thursday night

just tried to wake him up and he told me to leave him alone
im ringing the docs first thing in the morning i cant take this much more and its not just me hes pushing adele away too

maybe tomoz will be a better day

 

[Hypnorm]

My hubby was a bit like that at one point , he'd been made reduntant and been in a car accident writing off his pride and joy which had also been his dads car for xxx yrs.
The bank was telling him to sell his house and to rent because of the dept he was in.
And he got depressed and went on antidepressants, i think that was the worst thing he ever did, as he had mood swings, i'd forget on little thing and he would go mad.
I took him a couple of yrs before he got back to being his normal self.
He went to a finacial adviser who helped him consolidate all the depts without him having to sell his house, which was very bad advice from the bank but all they wanted was their money they dont think about how it affects anyone!
I knowe times are hard but, hubby pulled him self up and went and actively found a job, and started doing things he enjoyed and it really helped.

He went through a similar phase about a week after ewan was born being very moody, and unhappy. but it passed and is fine thiese days.
He took the plunge and became self employed..
Is there anything your hubby could make his own business out of as there are lotso f grants available.. we weren't as tom earned too much anyway.

 

[weestar21]

thats wher all our problems started when OH went self employed as a BSM driving instructor. We had to sell our house we were head deep in debt and had to pay fro private let and now were beingevicted but luckily the council are finally giving us a house.

Bescause OH has declairded himself as bankrupt he wouldnt beable to go self employed again anyways.
As for a chrisis loan thing we have been turned down because he works more than 24hrs a week,

I dont get any money at all except child benefit and tax credits but its not enugh for all 4 of us to live off if he loses this job aswell

the way im feeling right now i want to grab him and slap him and tell him to snap out of it but ive just not got teh energy and i knwo thast not the answer.

just hope the doc can advise me on something

thanks for all yoru replys
xxxxx

 

[Strangeness]

Hun it may sound horrible but maybe you need to shock him a bit. Tell him that the girls are suffering because he's not his usual self or something like that? I don't know what else to suggest hun

 

[Tara & Liam]

have you tried to get a grant / loan from your council, (is that the same as a crisis loan).

Let us know how you are getting on.

I think that your OH is really having difficulties, it might help if he were willing to talk to someone. you both have had a lot to deal with over a little while, and it is just like one brick after brick if that makes sense. hopefully being in your new place is helping.

 

[weestar21]

Well he went to the docs on monday (the werent going to take him till next friday) as an emergnacy appointment. The doctor took his BP and said it was really high and he had to try stop stressing He gave him a 2 week sick line and once we move at the weekend and get a new doc he has to make an appointment their to see if they are going to put him on medication or give him more time off. Thing thast worring me is hes only been in this new job for about 3 weeks can they sack him for being off sick with a doctors line?

not sure if he will be entitle to SSP from his emplyer either
but i will just need to wait and see how he is afterthe weekend when we finally move.

He seems a wee tiny bit better but still not eating very much and sleeping alot during the day and not getting enough sleep at night.

only time will tell
but will keep yous posted but internet will bet cut off fromsaturday and i wontbe able to get back on till the 30th so hopefully when i return it will be all ok

xxxxxxxx