Insecure hubby

Jezzabond

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I am having issues with hubby. he is slightly overweight but I love him with all my heart.

I am due tomorrow and he has not been near me for months. It is quite frustrating. I know he loves me as we still cuddle and kiss and stuff but it is not nice to be kind of neglected in that way, especially as it can bring labour on and I want that!! He tells me it is because he can't get as close as he would like to me due to the pregnancy and because he feels fat. It is so sad. I hate to have him feel like this. I try to reassure him but he gets annoyed and does not want to talk about it.

He said things will go back to normal once baby arrives but then I may not want to for some time! I feel so helpless, I don't know what to do. I miss the closeness and intimacy with him and feel sad :(
 
Ahh hun! Do what I do then, and tell OH to lose the weight. Dont sit about moaning, do something about it.

It hasnt worked so far, but then like your OH mine isnt really fat, just abit plump round the middle.

All you can do is what you are doing unfortunatley, try and make him feel as loved as possible... easyer said than done. Sorry I dont have any more advice - if you find a solution, let me know :lol:
 
why is he saying things will go back to normal after baby arrives? that suggests its not his weight thats the issue its your pregnancy- which i found my boyf was a bit funny towards the end. melissa was breech until nearly 37 weeks, and when she turned my boyf admitted he was a bit freaked out about doing you-know-what so near to his daughter's head. which i can understand i spose!

i nagged my boyf for sex to bring on labour- but i made the hugeeeeee mistake of whining, looking tired and scruffy with my joggy pants and unbrushed hair, and telling him to get this baby out of me! he said it was a turn-off and made him feel "used" and sex seem so clinical! he wouldnt oblige, even refused bj's which are a rare treat (i read they could work lol!)

lesson learned for when we ttc i suppose- no mention of fertile times or anything else unwiley- do sex kitten act instead!


if it IS his weight though, sounds like he might be depressed, try to encourage him to talk to his gp or just to join a gym- do u have a brother/mutual male friend he might like to go with? sorry idk what else to suggest- my boyf is the opposite- he's the most self-assured person iv ever met its astonishing! maybe after baby arrives arrange a babysitter once a week, and do something together- if he's reluctant use the guise of "i want to lose my babyweight and want the support will you come along with me?" instead of making out like its for his benefit? me and my boyf used to do thai boxing together and LOVED it. its one of those FUN kind of exercises, not those tedious running machines etc! :hug:
 
I would work on the bad feelings sooner rather than later, as lack of sleep is only going to make you both feel more unloved when the baby arrives. If he is feeling miserable about himself, rather him feel better than him feeling miserable and frustrated!!

I'd get him a months gym membership or something (not all have 12 month contracts) or pay for 2 weeks of one off classes, so that once you've bought them it would be a waste not to use them. Or a new pair of swimming shorts?

x
 
..i think you need to settle this intimacy issue before the baby goes out. By then, you won't have enough sleep and most attention will go to the baby. Give it a serious talk..a heart to heart talk.
 

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