IM LIVID!! fuming.....

[Jones]

hey, thanks for reading........here goes....i got a 5 month old and basically got with her father only about 5 months before i fell pregnant although we were friends long b4 this. anyhow he hasnt been very responsible in the past with money so its now thats hes really picking things together saving for our house and not spending all his money on sport. he lives with me and my rents till we buy a house, we are very fortunate. however his mother from the start reckons my mum has been "undoing her good work" because my mum cooks meals and irons his clothes...my mum says theres no point us all cooking diff meals...its cheaper and easier just to do one big meal! but alas u know his mum has her view...well this mum..whos so perfect has let her son eat shite all his life...gave him money from god knows what age to go down to the shop to buy sweets..sooo thats what he did...so know his teeth are in a really bad state, he needs teeth removal, root canal, u name it hes gotta have it, hes scareed of the dentist aswell....my fury is...IF SHE WAS SUCH A GREAT MUM why on earth didnt she encourage him to go to the dentist...why didnt she sort this out. now hes got to endure far more. hes scared of the dentist and this hasnt helped by far. she looks like she doesnt take acre of her teeth. im just fuming. she has the right to criticise my parents for looking after us yet..she has let her sons teeth get to this state..wheres her responsibility as a parent.....i feel like telling her straight how i feel im so bloody annoyed!!!!!!!! please gimme ur opinion thank u xxx

 

[nik106]

Its probably not wise to tell her straight what you think - my future MIL has really annoyed me too, but if i say anything it'll just cause problems for me and OH. My OH will tell her (partly) where to go, but i have to remain diplomatic too. Unfortunately, for yours, his and your LO's sake, i'd say you're going to have to be diplomatic, not say much. Explain why your mum is cooking/cleaning etc (i actually think her cooking is a good idea as it does save time and costs if the whole household eat the same). Maybe point out that you're looking forward to having your own house and for the cooking etc to become a shared responsibility but right now, that's not possible.

Try not to take it to heart, there is a chance that she's being bitchy because she can see what better parents yours have been than her. If you can ignore her, do so! It'll save you a lot of hassle in the future!

 

[Jones]

thanks for ur advice...its so sad that we cant get on with our inlaws better. i wish i culd...but shes so opinionated and works in probabtion so thinks she knows a lot plus likes to point out where every offender lives which as i got my lil one nw...i really dont want to know...ahhhh i feel envy for those who get on with their inlaws!!! im just so annoyed it feels like im picking up the pieces with my oh when these problems should have been prevented by help from responsible parents! i think bcuz i got the little one now i see things differently again to before.....i hope ur relationship with ur inlaws gets better unfortunatly my oh knows i dont click with his mother..im too honest xx

 

[nik106]

My OH knows that she's annoyed me, but he also knows i won't let her know it, i think in part, she's annoyed him too so he understands why i'm angry. She obviously doesn't have a problem with me, as today she was pushing for us to set a wedding date.

I hope things improve, although i suspect that its going to take a lot of keeping schtum on your behalf! She probably doesn't even realise that she's wound you up! I think as time goes on, people get more used to accommodating each other's family's, and at that point it becomes easier as boundaries can be drawn